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Salsa: the miracle food-product

Started by Cait M. R., November 24, 2009, 01:44:29 PM

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Cait M. R.

Ah, the wonders of salsa. That reddish chip-sludge that so many people have eaten, little do they know of its many uses.

I can put this shit in ANYTHING and it makes it better. For example, try a salsa meatloaf sometimes. No, really. It is bright red all the way through and ridiculously delicious. I'm also well known among my friends and family for my awesome salsa-based hot pasta salad. Something that, though it is physically painful to stir, cannot be fucked up by even the worst cook on earth (i.e., me). I'll probably post a recipe sometime.

Oh, and I also mix this delicious pseudo-Mexican paste into macaroni and cheese. Not the box kind (though that is even made edible by salsa) but the oven kind. Fuck, I bet there's like, maybe 10 commonly-eaten foods that can't be improved with the addition of a half cup of goddamn salsa. And I bet they're all desserts or sandwiches.

Furthermore, there's usually a metric assload of salsa in my fridge at any given time. And if I can't find anything else to eat, you can be damn sure I can make a fucking awesome meal out of pasta and random shit we have in the cupboards.

Tl;dr, fucking salsa kicks ass.

Sir Squid Diddimus

so no recipes?
what kind of salsa do you mean?

i mean there's salsa fresca, salsa verde, xni pec, black bean, corn, etc....

Cait M. R.

I mean chunky.

Yes, the American not-quite-salsa salsa.

Recipes will be coming soon. I don't have them now because I normally make my food without measuring at all. I just guess.

Sir Squid Diddimus

Quote from: null & void on November 24, 2009, 05:02:28 PM
I mean chunky.

Yes, the American not-quite-salsa salsa.

Recipes will be coming soon. I don't have them now because I normally make my food without measuring at all. I just guess.

does this mean, from a jar?
you don't have to measure btw, a guess is just as good with stuff like this

Cait M. R.

Quote from: Squid on November 24, 2009, 05:09:43 PM
Quote from: null & void on November 24, 2009, 05:02:28 PM
I mean chunky.

Yes, the American not-quite-salsa salsa.

Recipes will be coming soon. I don't have them now because I normally make my food without measuring at all. I just guess.

does this mean, from a jar?
you don't have to measure btw, a guess is just as good with stuff like this

Worse. It means from a jar or, more often, a gigantic plastic container. Yes, I buy in bulk because I use it that much.

Well, as far as guessing, it's hard to do with this because I have an extremely hard time comparing amounts off-hand. When I next make my pasta salad I'll set all the ingredients aside beforehand and compare the sizes, so I don't get them confused and fuck it all up forever.

If you want to try guessing at it on your own, though... I'll get a rough list of ingredients in a little while here.

LMNO

I think he means, "not-salsa salsa".




You know, the goopy, almost-ketchup, mostly cornsyrup and faux jalepeno additive sodium supplement.

East Coast Hustle

to be fair, there ARE some pretty good commercially available salsas.

however, none of them say "Pace" or "Old El Paso" on the jar.
Rabid Colostomy Hole Jammer of the Coming Apocalypse™

The Devil is in the details; God is in the nuance.


Some yahoo yelled at me, saying 'GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH', and I thought, "I'm feeling generous today.  Why not BOTH?"

LMNO

Do any of them come in 5-gallon buckets?

Cait M. R.

Quote from: LMNO on November 24, 2009, 06:19:54 PM
I think she means, "not-salsa salsa".




You know, the goopy, almost-ketchup, mostly cornsyrup and faux jalepeno additive sodium supplement.
Fix'd

Not-salsa salsa yes. Almost ketchup? Nnnnno. (I cannot STAND ketchup. It leads to violent vomit spells.) I think you're thinking of that stuff with the consistency of thin spaghetti sauce. While this is in fact goopy, it's also full of gigantic veggie chunks.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

My favorite jarred kind is the Herdez.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Sir Squid Diddimus

<---- spoiled. doesn't like the stuff in jars (and has tried more than pace and old el paso, but not buckets)

Salty

The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

LMNO

FACT: chopping up tomato, garlic, onion, serrano and cilantro with lime juice, tequila and salt is better than salsa.

Sir Squid Diddimus

Quote from: LMNO on November 25, 2009, 01:38:19 PM
FACT: chopping up tomato, garlic, onion, serrano and cilantro with lime juice, tequila and salt is better than salsa.

!!!

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Squid on November 25, 2009, 04:51:33 PM
Quote from: LMNO on November 25, 2009, 01:38:19 PM
FACT: chopping up tomato, garlic, onion, serrano and cilantro with lime juice, tequila and salt is better than salsa.

!!!

:crankey:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."