SHUT UP, CHICKENS

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I mean, seriously. 20 minutes of bagawwwk at 6 am just because you shoved an egg out your ass?

SHUT UP.

[Chairman Risus]

To be fair, it's a better reaction than I would have had under the same conditions.

[Dysnomia]

ear plugs?

[BabylonHoruv]

My dad kept the chickens far enough away from the house that they couldn't wake us up, although that also meant if they were being murdered by a raccoon or a weasel we wouldn't know about it until too late.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I should totally move them farther from the house, like maybe I should move them into those townhouses they just built behind me.

It's not normally this annoying, fortunately. They're just spazzy because it's winter.

[Dysnomia]

do you have a garage or shed where you could house them till the cease to be annoying, and it ceases to be winter?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Oh, they live in an insulated, heated house. They're pissy because there isn't much to eat besides pellet and corn, and they want to be decimating plant life. They're also pissy because the sun doesn't come up until almost 8, and because I won't let them out until after the dogs have gotten to go out.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Oh, and now one of them has gone broody.

[Dysnomia]

oh lol.  Silly chickens. 

[BabylonHoruv]

we fed ours house garbage.  As long as there's no eggshells in it they can eat pretty much any compost.

[The Johnny]

we fed ours house garbage.  As long as there's no eggshells in it they can eat pretty much any compost.

Otherwise they feel guilty?

[The Johnny]

Gawd, living with chickens must be like walking on eggshells annoying.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Mine get compost too, but there's not that much compost.

[E.O.T.]

EITHER

          That's what happens when you feed them old omelettes and turkey carcass. Seriously, wait till you see what their carnivorous shit does to your compost in the garden. That's right, feed me Seymour. Little garden of child eating horrors.

OR

          It's the wail of forthcoming lament, because they know you'll arrive later to gingerly, affectionately, steal their unborn children. Yet tomorrow, again they will give, and give again. They're like little chicken Atlas'es, putting eggs on your plate faithfully, despite the horror. And being Portland Atlas'es, maybe the Greeks weren't so wrong, because in their little henhouse of Lesbos, unknowable FTM tranz chicken operations are being performed, and to every Greek who wanders by they look like little tough guy roosters, with wallet chains and cigarette packs under their rolled up sleeves, with sideburns and sleeves of tattoos. And yet that "Ba, Ba, Baw, Baw,Bawkaaaw" so early in the morning, so painful on the ears and heavy in their little chicken Atlas woe and Whoa!, will later in the day carry your heart to a sweet place when all else is a world full of shit. 

[Fredfredly ⊂(◉‿◉)つ]

what is with your either/or in every post. its annoying. stop.