What is the largest animal you think you could kill with your bare hands?

[Bu🤠ns]

http://kentbeatty.com/2009/02/19/chimps-gone-berserk-woman-mauled-baby-killed/

crazy things


I could take down the Hoff.

[Triple Zero]

[Thurnez Isa]

Ok that was seriously the fucking cutest thing I have ever seen

[Cain]

I could kill this wretched creature.  And the goat, if need be.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I guess this kind of thing is inevitable after the content rush of the last couple months.

[0]

I could probably kill this:

[Epimetheus]

I could probably kill this:

I don't know if I'd want to touch that.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

 

best thread on PD

[BadBeast]

I'd be comfortably confident of my chances against a human. But thinking about a big critter, and we are proportionally so much weaker than them. Apes would be out of the question. Chimps are like little hairy uBersKinz, strong enough to pull off your arm. Big teeth too. Out of the question. Gorillas are twice the size, but I'd rather take on a Gorilla than a Adult Chimp. Oran utangs are as strong as JCB Earthmovers, and the Males are aggressive, and are well known for putting the raep on anything they can catch. So nuh uh! Monkeys, I reckon I could kill a Baboon. They're not so tough. They can kill Dogs though. Anything up to a  large Pits are quickly despatched. The Dogs run in to get a bite, and the Baboon wraps its at arms and legs around, and then gets those huge teeth stuck in! And the thing to remember about Baboons is they have four hands. (2 hand/feet).

But it's funny, I've seen film footage of Baboons, and one Adult Baboon will think nothing of fronting out a pair of grown Cheetahs, without any fear at all. But one Leopard, will have a whole Troop of thirty Adults racing for the nearest tree / high up escape. They are terrified of Leopards. And so am I. So big cats are off the Billing. But I would take on three Cheetahs. And win. Cheetahs have much weaker smaller mouths than say, a Tiger or Lion. I'd stand a better chance against three Cheetahs than Pent would against three Rottys. For sure.

Rottys are full size Mastiffs, 12 Stone each when they're grown. They have awesomely powerful jaws too. They can run along at fult tilt, jump 7 feet up in the air, catch the branch of a tree, and hang there just by their jaw power. That's awesome when you consider 12 stone moving at up to 15 mile per hour. They were bred by the Romans specially for tearing into a charging line of Cavaly and taking out the horses.  And Pent reckons three of them? Two of them would be the Famous Scottish over optomism. Three? Nah, If Scotsmen were capable of killing three Rottweillers each, then It wouldn't have been The English ruled the Empire for so long.  
Gorillas, yeah,

I also would take on an 5 -6ft Alligator or  Croc,  Especially in this weather where I'd have the advantage  of them being torpid and slow. Just have to get their jaws shut, (one hand) then poke an eye out, with fingers, and gouge at socket until movement ceases. How hard can it be?
I wouldn't take an Ostrich on, they are fucking insane, mad as a tripping chicken, and if you just imagine them with no feathers,they are Velociraptors! nope, they're more  deadly than the proper Reptiles, steer clear.

I forgot Bonobos. That might be tricky, because they wont fight. But If I put the sex on them, for long enough, I'm sure it would die before I did. And if attacked by a Chimp,  you should get your dick  out  (assuming you have one)  and they run the fuck away. Chimps have tiny little dicks, littler than Chinamen apparently and they really don't wan't to have to groom and bitch for no Human, so they run. Just in case.
That's what my friend, Lie Bot  said, anyway.

So my choice is the 6FT Gator. (Then the Bonobo)
    

[Slyph]

Are we going by length or body mass? Because a big snake would probably be an easy kill.

[BadBeast]

Are we going by length or body mass? Because a big snake would probably be an easy kill.

I thought about a Snake, but it's not as easy as you'd think to kill a big one. Or even find one that's big enough to fight. Even when you chop one in half with a spade, the two ends go crawling off and become two separate snakes. And some of them are venomous, and can give you a nasty bite. That's why I opted for a Alligator. At least their bite isn't poisonous.

[Kai]

I could kill a fully grown human. I wouldn't even think of fucking with a squirrel, or anything larger than a large beetle.

[Slyph]

Are we going by length or body mass? Because a big snake would probably be an easy kill.

I thought about a Snake, but it's not as easy as you'd think to kill a big one. Or even find one that's big enough to fight. Even when you chop one in half with a spade, the two ends go crawling off and become two separate snakes. And some of them are venomous, and can give you a nasty bite. That's why I opted for a Alligator. At least their bite isn't poisonous.

All the really big ones are constrictors, innit? Couldn't you just stomp on the head?

[BadBeast]

Are we going by length or body mass? Because a big snake would probably be an easy kill.

I thought about a Snake, but it's not as easy as you'd think to kill a big one. Or even find one that's big enough to fight. Even when you chop one in half with a spade, the two ends go crawling off and become two separate snakes. And some of them are venomous, and can give you a nasty bite. That's why I opted for a Alligator. At least their bite isn't poisonous.

All the really big ones are constrictors, innit? Couldn't you just stomp on the head?

You could, but they are very tough, their jaws unhinge too, and they have teeth nearly as big as a dogs. Thy don't get big enough to swallow humams because we are too wide at the shoulders,and our arms won't go down.

[Adios]

WTF is wrong with you people?

I HAVE OPPOSING THUMBS AND WILL USE ANY FUCKING WEAPON I CAN WRAP MY HANDS AROUND.