Plus I Got Depression

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

So I ain't got no depression, but what I do has is OCD, which usually manifests itself in mild ways but, rarely, escalates to a problematic point. Last time it was bedbugs, fear of. I just realized that my constant worrying about people, which is a fairly normal state of existence for me, has recently escalated into the "obsessive" category. I realized this when I realized that Hippie Boy hasn't texted me in EIGHT DAYS, which should be a godsend because I was going to break up with him and also it makes perfect sense after I rebuffed his advances on Valentine's Day, but the first thing I thought was "OH NO I BETTER TEXT HIM AND MAKE SURE HE'S NOT DEAD!"

People I have been obsessively worried about the deaths of in the last few days include but are not limited to:

My EFO (there was an incident involving her being out of the house and unaccounted for for about an hour)
Roger
My dad
Hippie boy
Sir Talksalot (I don't even like that guy, why???)
Mario

Last night, in particular, involved me sleepless and in tears because I was convinced that Mario is dying. Which, although I am not the only one of his friends to have had that thought, is still totally ridiculous no matter how I try to justify it.

Roger isn't going to die. 

GOOD. Sometimes I just need to be told this shit.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

My EFO (there was an incident involving her being out of the house and unaccounted for for about an hour)

This happened to me once. My son was inside his friend's house and was supposed to be outside where I could see him. He was 10 minutes late coming home.
I flipped out and called the police.
I felt like an asshole when they were standing there telling me they couldn't find him and he came walking up.

Dude, where your kids are concerned freaking out over not knowing where they are for 10 minutes is totally justified. I was once in hysterics because LO thought it would be funny to hide from me. She was four, and within a few minutes I became convinced she had gotten outside and been kidnapped or was lost. EFO got outside TWICE when she was a toddler, so it wasn't such an unreasonable idea.

Needless to say, after seeing Mommy have a hysterical breakdown, she never did that again.

[Faust]

Another lovely day, the sun is shining and there's not a drop of rain about. What a wonderful world.

[Doktor Howl]

So I ain't got no depression, but what I do has is OCD, which usually manifests itself in mild ways but, rarely, escalates to a problematic point. Last time it was bedbugs, fear of. I just realized that my constant worrying about people, which is a fairly normal state of existence for me, has recently escalated into the "obsessive" category. I realized this when I realized that Hippie Boy hasn't texted me in EIGHT DAYS, which should be a godsend because I was going to break up with him and also it makes perfect sense after I rebuffed his advances on Valentine's Day, but the first thing I thought was "OH NO I BETTER TEXT HIM AND MAKE SURE HE'S NOT DEAD!"

People I have been obsessively worried about the deaths of in the last few days include but are not limited to:

My EFO (there was an incident involving her being out of the house and unaccounted for for about an hour)
Roger
My dad
Hippie boy
Sir Talksalot (I don't even like that guy, why???)
Mario

Last night, in particular, involved me sleepless and in tears because I was convinced that Mario is dying. Which, although I am not the only one of his friends to have had that thought, is still totally ridiculous no matter how I try to justify it.

Roger isn't going to die. 

GOOD. Sometimes I just need to be told this shit.

I cannot be killed, much like palo verde beetles and New York wharf rats.  Thanks for your concern, though.

[Doktor Howl]

Another lovely day, the sun is shining and there's not a drop of rain about. What a wonderful world.

I'm lying in bed with a laptop and a big mug of soup.

Yeah, life is pretty good.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

It's completely irrational and not reality-based. I just start going in my head and somehow at the time it makes sense. I've been able to tone it down a lot since I realized what I was doing, though, which is good.

[Doktor Howl]

It's completely irrational and not reality-based. I just start going in my head and somehow at the time it makes sense. I've been able to tone it down a lot since I realized what I was doing, though, which is good.

I know precisely how you feel. 

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

It's completely irrational and not reality-based. I just start going in my head and somehow at the time it makes sense. I've been able to tone it down a lot since I realized what I was doing, though, which is good.

I know precisely how you feel. 

Heh!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

So I haven't masturbated for several weeks because I have this thing where I start crying after I orgasm. I gave it a shot today to see if it's gone away, and it hasn't.

I'm sure that for someone out there, that's a feature. For me, it's definitely a bug. 

[Freeky]

That sucks.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

It's fairly goddamn lame.

[East Coast Hustle]

So I haven't masturbated for several weeks because I have this thing where I start crying after I orgasm. I gave it a shot today to see if it's gone away, and it hasn't.

I'm sure that for someone out there, that's a feature. For me, it's definitely a bug. 

easy solution: never stop orgasming.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

That probably sounds better in theory than it would work out in practice...

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

Nigel I empathise, hon, I am having trouble with the voices and the fap.

It gets so I can get the horn but the psychosis makes it difficult to impossible to climax.

That's my biggest issue with the crazy. Stress makes it worse but I have had to quit the pot and the main other coping mechanism also makes me feel fucked up and I'm at a bit of a loss as to how to deal with it.

Also my dad is getting on my and my stepmother's nerves and making her feel stupid. Apparently I'm weird cos I like literature like Chaucer and Shakespeare and like to eat a high fibre diet with plenty of vegetables.

I have given up trying to cook here cos they are so set in their ways and everything I make us weird.

I'm looking forward to seeing a real shrink instead of the community psychiactric nurse so I can get anti psychotics if I need them.

Hopefully they will prescribe me ones that will not fuck with my sexual function too much and not make me gain a fuckton of weight.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Not being able to climax is the worst... so frustrating! Especially fapping; it's not so bad if you just can't finish with a partner and have to get yourself off manually afterward.