Author Topic: EvangeliGASM  (Read 8494 times)

Salty

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #30 on: February 23, 2010, 02:02:59 am »
 :argh!:



 :lol:

Not a problem. I learn more shooping this way.

Eh, this'll take me a bit. Might not get done until tomorrow.
« Last Edit: February 23, 2010, 02:06:05 am by Alty »
The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

Salty

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #31 on: February 23, 2010, 02:13:12 am »
Oh yeah. That's beyond me. dots per inch is the same as pixels per inch, then the original unmodified image is not large enough to fit.

If anyone knows how to work around this, please do let me know.

ETA: Maybe if I create the image at that size and then crop the excess. Will try that later.
« Last Edit: February 23, 2010, 02:24:05 am by Alty »
The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #32 on: February 23, 2010, 08:04:55 am »
Oh yeah. That's beyond me. dots per inch is the same as pixels per inch, then the original unmodified image is not large enough to fit.

If anyone knows how to work around this, please do let me know.

ETA: Maybe if I create the image at that size and then crop the excess. Will try that later.

I know how to work around this.

All you have to do is drop it into Illustrator, live trace it, and fiddle with the settings until it looks how you want it to look. Then open a new Illustrator document with the correct porportions, drag your live traced image into it, resize it and reset your text. Then convert your text to outlines, save it as a PDF and your printer and everyone enjoying your cards will be happy as a clam.

If you don't have Illustrator, either I could do it for you real quick, or I could offer some suggestions about how to do it in Photoshop (It could take quite a few words so I won't do it here). The best way to do it for crisp edges is in Illustrator, because the file can default to the highest resolution the printer is capable of very easily, and also because it's quicker. In Photoshop, you're stuck with the resolution it originated at, unless you're scaling down, so you have to manually redraw the image with the pen tool for clean lines. Other shortcuts might work, depending on what your dealing with.

Also, in a printing context, dots per inch refers to printing resolution and is not equivalent to pixels per inch, which is a measure of screen resolution. To make things even more confusing, lines per inch (in a printing context) refers to a halftone screen which is different than both dpi and ppi.

Feel free to PM so this thread doesn't get bogged down in boring, technical bullshit.

(edited for clarity)
« Last Edit: February 23, 2010, 10:25:15 am by Ne+@uNGr0+ »
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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #33 on: February 23, 2010, 09:40:08 am »
just passing along - i was always kinda, "business cards are a cool idea, but fuck a bunch of spending money" - but, for some reason, today, this very thread prompted me to look up how much it would cost and found they are cheap. 


THIS WEBSITE WILL PRINT 500 CARDS FOR $9.99 - HOLY FUCK THAT'S WAY CHEAPER THAN I THOUGHT BUSINESS CARDS WOULD BE!!!

anyhow, just passing that on in case there are others out there that just assumed printing cards was prohibitively expensive.
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Salty

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #34 on: February 23, 2010, 06:04:43 pm »
You can also get these:

http://www.amazon.com/Avery-Linen-Textured-Two-Side-Business-08873/dp/B00009KIYH/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=office-products&qid=1266948238&sr=8-2

and print them at home.

I also saw a 250 pack for $10 on Sam's Club's website.

They might not look professional grade, but...

Meanwhile, I'll try that workaround, thanks net!
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Eater of Clowns

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #35 on: February 23, 2010, 07:10:42 pm »
Okay, here's a larger version, double standard business card size.
I'll just do these at this size from now on.



I wanna add, I laughed my ASS OFF making this one.

The proportions are off from the original, but I'm terrible at details like that.

CAN'T BE BOTHERED.

You horrible bastards!

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: Wtf IS that image??

That's a WOMP that FP did of me over some bizarre costume pic he found from the 4chan google wave.
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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #36 on: February 23, 2010, 08:53:35 pm »
 :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz: Its fking good and looks real, one of those pics that gives you a chance to use your imagination
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Telarus

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #37 on: February 23, 2010, 10:18:15 pm »
I 2nd the Illustrator suggestion for massive scale-up. Screen rez is 72dpi (basically), and most printers range above 1,000dpi now-a-days.
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Salty

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #38 on: February 23, 2010, 10:22:54 pm »
I've got Illustrator and will take a whack at it as soon as I am able.
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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #39 on: February 24, 2010, 11:02:20 am »
ITT yatto remembers he said he would make a 'hello stranger, im a pope" card
Look, asshole:  Your 'incomprehensible' act, your word-salad, your pinealism...It BORES ME.  I've been incomprehensible for so long, I TEACH IT TO MBA CANDIDATES.  So if you simply MUST talk about your pineal gland or happy children dancing in the wildflowers, go talk to Roger, because he digs that kind of shit

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #40 on: April 28, 2010, 05:41:04 am »
I know that this is about 2 and a half months later than the original post, but I've made fake tracts with Jesus on the front to make it look like a Christian tract, but with weird stuff inside. The gist of it was a take on WWJD, but saying that Jesus would have you think for yourself and not let a piece of paper do it for you, including this piece of paper. I included random quotes that had nothing to do with anything as well as a fun facts section, and in the end where they usually ask you to check off whether or not you've accepted Jesus, I put several options, some of which said something like, "Yes I will think for myself and not listen to a stupid tract" "This tract is stupid, therefore I will not think for myself" "Wait, what? Which one of the two above do I pick" and the last one was, "Ah, yes, yes, fnord, hail Eris and all that rot" I would leave them on the MBTA, and I gave some to my drummer, who, while not a Discordian, likes the idea of handing out fake tracts. Based on a recent facebook thread, he's encouraged me to do a new one that remixes Bible verses so that they include references to the MBTA, which I intend to do. Sadly, the original WWJD one is on my old computer which has decided to go into eternal slumber.

That said, I'm onboard. THis sort of thing is my style. I've been wanting to jump onto (and eventually pitch my own) GASMs, part of the reason I signed up here.

So I was sitting at a bar last night with EOT and, kind of out of the blue, the image of Cram on a streetcorner earnestly handing out Discordian pamphlets popped into my head. And it was funny. I laughed.

And then I was enlightened.

So what I would like to do here is follow through with Cram's (I think it was Cram's) idea of streetcorner Discordian evangelism... put together some little pamphlets, ones that can be printed on a single sheet of paper, then cut up, folded, and stapled... and start handing them out. I'll post them on SCRIBD as I get them done. Contributions to this project, whether in the form of ideas or pamphlets, are welcome.
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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #41 on: April 28, 2010, 07:10:32 am »
YOU GUYS, I HAVE THE GREATEST IDEA EVER!

EvanJELLOism:

You make a bowl of jello, with a tract promoting your religion imbedded inside of it. But to get to it, your potential converts must eat the jello first.

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Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #42 on: April 28, 2010, 08:26:41 am »
YOU GUYS, I HAVE THE GREATEST IDEA EVER!

EvanJELLOism:

You make a bowl of jello, with a tract promoting your religion imbedded inside of it. But to get to it, your potential converts must eat the jello first.



I like it, but, I would be reluctant to eat Jello that had paper in it, even if it looked interesting. Plus, you would have to serve it to someone.
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Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #43 on: April 28, 2010, 08:34:58 am »
YOU GUYS, I HAVE THE GREATEST IDEA EVER!

EvanJELLOism:

You make a bowl of jello, with a tract promoting your religion imbedded inside of it. But to get to it, your potential converts must eat the jello first.



Maybe what you could do is sneak it onto a help yourself table at a large party descretely. I did that sort of thing with EggGASM. Pretty good results.
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Re: EvangeliGASM
« Reply #44 on: April 28, 2010, 08:40:14 am »
Nephew Twiddleton, those fake Jesus tracts sound pretty awesome! Can you post a link to the documents?
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