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I WILL KILL A MOTHERFUCKER.

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ITT: TELL ME EVERYTHING

Started by E.O.T., February 21, 2010, 03:28:01 AM

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Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#30
February 25, 2010, 03:29:03 AM
Also I tried to use the offer of free drinks to lure Surfer Boy to attend Erika's party with me and alleviate my Mario-related anxiety, but his phone is turned off and then I remembered that he hates Erika anyway.

It's not until nine. Maybe I should just not go.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Nast

#31
February 25, 2010, 03:29:29 AM Last Edit: February 25, 2010, 03:31:22 AM by Nast
Quote from: E.O.T. on February 25, 2010, 03:09:08 AM
Quote from: Nast on February 21, 2010, 08:09:33 AM
If I have to count the number of stamens on another tiny, insignificant-looking weed again I will scream and never be able to stop.

And sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I were suddenly to only person on earth. That would make it okay to masturbate wherever, right?

1)

         make it fun. create a "doh!" style drinking game out of the stamen count


That would certainly enliven keying out the species:

"If stamens greater than no. of petals, get shit-faced!"

Quote from: E.O.T. on February 25, 2010, 03:09:08 AM
2)         if there were no other humans around you'd have no need to masturbate - the planet's full of fuckable species and there'd be NOBODY to judge you.


Then one could REALLY keep fucking that chicken.
"If I owned Goodwill, no charity worker would feel safe.  I would sit in my office behind a massive pile of cocaine, racking my pistol's slide every time the cleaning lady came near.  Auditors, I'd just shoot."

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#32
February 25, 2010, 03:29:51 AM
Why is everyone I know too broke to go out? Fuck you, economy! :crankey:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Dimocritus

#33
February 25, 2010, 04:09:35 AM
I AM

                 sleeping with a whole roll of TP next to my bed because my nose is leaking uncontrollably.

THIS BUGS

                 the hell out of me because I never get sick. I'm just gonna call it alergies and ignore it 'till it goes
                 away. Health-plan, what?
HOUSE OF GABCab ~ "caecus plumbum caecus"

Nast

#34
February 25, 2010, 04:12:36 AM
Quote from: dimo on February 25, 2010, 04:09:35 AM
I AM

                 sleeping with a whole roll of TP next to my bed because my nose is leaking uncontrollably.

TELL ME ABOUT IT!

I've been so dry the inside of my nose is all bleedy, and every morning I wake up to find horrific amalgamations of congealed blood and snot all up in there,
which I am then obliged to remove daintily.
"If I owned Goodwill, no charity worker would feel safe.  I would sit in my office behind a massive pile of cocaine, racking my pistol's slide every time the cleaning lady came near.  Auditors, I'd just shoot."

Jenne

#35
February 25, 2010, 04:13:56 AM
Quote from: Nast on February 21, 2010, 08:09:33 AM
If I have to count the number of stamens on another tiny, insignificant-looking weed again I will scream and never be able to stop.

And sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I were suddenly to only person on earth. That would make it okay to masturbate wherever, right?

There's a thread in Bring N Brag where someone claims to mentally masturbate when/wherever...following a vid clip of him mentally masturbating.  Is that what you call it?  Cumming through THINKING about it?

Dimocritus

#36
February 25, 2010, 04:34:49 AM
Quote from: Nast on February 25, 2010, 04:12:36 AM
Quote from: dimo on February 25, 2010, 04:09:35 AM
I AM

                 sleeping with a whole roll of TP next to my bed because my nose is leaking uncontrollably.

TELL ME ABOUT IT!

I've been so dry the inside of my nose is all bleedy, and every morning I wake up to find horrific amalgamations of congealed blood and snot all up in there,
which I am then obliged to remove daintily.

I WISH

                      I had that problem.

IT'S LITERALY

                      dripping out of my nose. Dimo is no longer amused with this bull-shit...
HOUSE OF GABCab ~ "caecus plumbum caecus"

Nast

#37
February 25, 2010, 04:35:59 AM
Just jam the wads in there, and breathe out your mouf.
"If I owned Goodwill, no charity worker would feel safe.  I would sit in my office behind a massive pile of cocaine, racking my pistol's slide every time the cleaning lady came near.  Auditors, I'd just shoot."

Dimocritus

#38
February 25, 2010, 04:38:28 AM
Quote from: Nast on February 25, 2010, 04:35:59 AM
Just jam the wads in there, and breathe out your mouf.

ANY ONE

                       who saw the wads of tissue near my bed

WOULD THINK

                        I'm a chronic masturbater.
HOUSE OF GABCab ~ "caecus plumbum caecus"

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#39
February 25, 2010, 04:48:48 AM
I don't want to go to this party but I already said I would, there are new children in the neighborhood who shriek piercingly in the evenings, and my dog is irritating the shit out of me.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

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