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UNLIMITED Arizona Hilarity thread

Started by Requia ☣, April 22, 2010, 04:44:30 AM

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Don Coyote

Quote from: LizKing531 on April 04, 2012, 02:52:22 PM
Quote from: Cain on July 28, 2010, 09:39:25 PM
The sooner this thing goes critical, the better.

I suggest starting rumours that illegals are working at army bases and have been implicated in theft of military equipement, and see if the teabaggers are stupid enough to take the bait and protest a military base with their usual finesse and style (ie incoherent ranting, often while holding weapons).

I know I'm late to the party on this thread - but this is sheer brilliance -  why isnt this a thread or entire organization of its own?   hmm.....   8)

How did I not see this two years ago?
Someone better not point out all the smudgy people in the Army that aren't US citizens to those yahoos.

Juana

Ok, seriously. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOUR STATE, DOK?

From here[/
Quote from: Arizona Lawmakers Trying To Legislate Pregnancy Two Weeks Prior To Conception
Medically speaking, pregnancy starts when a fertilized egg implants in the uterine lining. Anti-choicers have attempted to shift the goalposts of pregnancy with their failed attempts to pass "personhood" laws conferring the full rights of a living, breathing person on a fertilized egg.

Arizona and other states with 20-week bans are trying to argue that you're pregnant a couple of weeks before you even had the sex that resulted in your pregnancy.

Think about the implications down the road. If a woman is "pregnant" two weeks before she becomes pregnant, than any fertile woman---including those currently menstruating!---should really be considered pregnant. After all, we don't know the future. We don't know that any non-pregnant woman couldn't be pregnant two weeks from now, making her retroactively pregnant now. Considering that it's anti-choice nuts we're talking about, it's safe to assume that they'd simply prefer a situation where all women of reproductive age are considered to be pregnant, on the grounds that they could be two weeks from now. Better safe than sorry, especially if that mentality means you get to exert maximum control over the bodies of women of reproductive age.

Between personhood bills and the assault on access to contraception, it's becoming increasingly clear that anti-choicers aren't satisfied with simply trying to control the already-pregnant. Finding ways to define the not-pregnant as pregnant is a means of laying the groundwork for exerting this control. Imagine if Roe is overturned and states go into a true frenzy of stripping every imaginable right away from pregnant women. It wouldn't be limited to stripping the right to abortion, but also to any kind of behavior deemed "abortive," including holding certain kinds of jobs, eating certain foods, or taking certain medications. With this bill, then, you could not only restrict the rights of those who are actually pregnant, but extend the restrictions to all women of reproductive age on the grounds that they "could be pregnant in two weeks, i.e. in perpetuity" and would therefore be considered the same thing as being pregnant.

Already in some states, they're looking for ways to prosecute women who have stillbirths if they did something the prosecutor believes may have had an impact on the pregnancy, such as drug use. With the hoped-for overturn of Roe, we can expect these efforts to intensify, with prosecutions of miscarriages. Now with this Arizona bill, if a woman is deemed pregnant two weeks before she actually is, prosecutors could even have a chance to look at your choices when you weren't even pregnant---before you even had the sex that made you pregnant---and blame those choices for bad outcomes. They're creating, brick by brick, the legal basis on which to prosecute a woman who drinks some alcohol, becomes pregnant two weeks later, and miscarries, even though she didn't drink while pregnant. And you best believe that when feminists protest this, they'll just paint it as if we're more interested in protecting drunken sluts than "babies."

If you can [legally] be "pregnant" without being pregnant, that also creates legal complications around simple menstruation. After all, menstruation is usually seen as the opposite of being pregnant; women use menstruation to mark that they aren't pregnant. But under this bill, you could both be menstruating and "pregnant" by law. Should Roe be overturned and the state start looking to prosecute women for miscarriages they deem inappropriately prevented, what about women who are just getting their period? They're "pregnant" under the pregnant-prior-to-conception framework, aren't they? Are they miscarrying in the eyes of the law or are they just continuing their theoretical pregnancy? These kinds of ambiguities are exactly the sort of thing zealous misogynist law enforcement will be looking to exploit.
WTFIDE
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

Doktor Howl

Molon Lube

Juana

"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

Doktor Howl

Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on April 04, 2012, 08:36:03 PM
I've noticed. Good fucking god.

Hmmm.   Desert terrain, women aren't considered people, all laws are vetted for compliance with religion, etc, etc.

Somehow, this is all sounding very familiar.

But the thing is, it's a bunch of butthurt CC RWNs, who are trying to get their licks in while they can, and also to see just how far they can push it.

We'll have to eat them, one fine day.
Molon Lube

Cain

However, on the plus side, you can declare yourself dead two weeks early, for tax purposes.

Doktor Howl

Quote from: Cain on April 04, 2012, 08:41:09 PM
However, on the plus side, you can declare yourself dead two weeks early, for tax purposes.

:lulz:

Douglas Adams was a prophet.
Molon Lube

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Guru Coyote on April 04, 2012, 03:28:15 PM
Quote from: LizKing531 on April 04, 2012, 02:52:22 PM
Quote from: Cain on July 28, 2010, 09:39:25 PM
The sooner this thing goes critical, the better.

I suggest starting rumours that illegals are working at army bases and have been implicated in theft of military equipement, and see if the teabaggers are stupid enough to take the bait and protest a military base with their usual finesse and style (ie incoherent ranting, often while holding weapons).

I know I'm late to the party on this thread - but this is sheer brilliance -  why isnt this a thread or entire organization of its own?   hmm.....   8)

How did I not see this two years ago?
Someone better not point out all the smudgy people in the Army that aren't US citizens to those yahoos.

No shit. There are a fuckton of people in the U.S. military who are immigrants. A lot of them are way bigger fans of the U.S.A than natural-born citizens.

Oooh, wonder if we could prod the Tea Party to try to ban non-natural-born citizens from military service? Because (unless things have changed) that is still a legitimate avenue of gaining citizenship.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

At some point, the logical extension of all this is that all non-menopausal women will be considered "pre-pregnant", and our every move will be scrutinizable for actions that could jeopardize the unborn, requiring us to be put under the care of a warden.

A male warden, of course.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Freeky

It seems like just about every week something crops up that makes me sorely tempted to make a break for it, no matter what consequences my God City will heap upon me, and that heap will be at least a medium sized foothill.

Do any of you spags live somehwere where this kind of thing seems a tad excessive?

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on April 05, 2012, 07:22:44 AM
It seems like just about every week something crops up that makes me sorely tempted to make a break for it, no matter what consequences my God City will heap upon me, and that heap will be at least a medium sized foothill.

Do any of you spags live somehwere where this kind of thing seems a tad excessive?

I would say Portland, but honestly Seattle seems a bit better as Washington State seems to be more progressive overall.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Freeky

Quote from: Nigel on April 05, 2012, 07:24:09 AM
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on April 05, 2012, 07:22:44 AM
It seems like just about every week something crops up that makes me sorely tempted to make a break for it, no matter what consequences my God City will heap upon me, and that heap will be at least a medium sized foothill.

Do any of you spags live somehwere where this kind of thing seems a tad excessive?

I would say Portland, but honestly Seattle seems a bit better as Washington State seems to be more progressive overall.

Hm.

Doktor Howl

The great thing about that bill is that it would force women to behave at all times as if they were pregnant.

So no drinking, ladies.  Because you can never tell, right?
Molon Lube

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on April 05, 2012, 07:48:46 AM
Quote from: Nigel on April 05, 2012, 07:24:09 AM
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on April 05, 2012, 07:22:44 AM
It seems like just about every week something crops up that makes me sorely tempted to make a break for it, no matter what consequences my God City will heap upon me, and that heap will be at least a medium sized foothill.

Do any of you spags live somehwere where this kind of thing seems a tad excessive?

I would say Portland, but honestly Seattle seems a bit better as Washington State seems to be more progressive overall.

Hm.

Or, you could live in "The Other Vancouver", which Seattlites sometimes refer to as the San Diego of Washington State (I am not overlooking the fact that this makes Portland Tijuana) and have the best of both worlds.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 05, 2012, 05:42:30 PM
The great thing about that bill is that it would force women to behave at all times as if they were pregnant.

So no drinking, ladies.  Because you can never tell, right?

Because in Arizona, no restriction of rights is too far!
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."