How to not fail at life

[BADGE OF HONOR]

what's an assburger supposed to do in order to build social skills and confidence?
mebbe a gift will at least give the lady pause long enough that they can engage in conversation and level up a bit?

Most people with "assburgers" are just lacking practice in social skillz.

[Elder Iptuous]

exactly. 
so what's the best way to do that?
upon reflection, stunning them with generosity would almost certainly creep the other person out.

what would your reaction be if an assburger came up to you and awkwardly, but frankly said that they had no social skills, and needed somebody to engage in conversation with in order to practice?  (assuming they seemed genuine about that)
might something straight forward like that at least convince you to befriend them tentatively?

[Nast]

exactly. 
so what's the best way to do that?
upon reflection, stunning them with generosity would almost certainly creep the other person out.

what would your reaction be if an assburger came up to you and awkwardly, but frankly said that they had no social skills, and needed somebody to engage in conversation with in order to practice?  (assuming they seemed genuine about that)
might something straight forward like that at least convince you to befriend them tentatively?

No, I really wouldn't want to be someone's "practice friend".

[Requia ☣]

what's an assburger supposed to do in order to build social skills and confidence?
mebbe a gift will at least give the lady pause long enough that they can engage in conversation and level up a bit?

Most people with "assburgers" are just lacking practice in social skillz.

Fuck you badge.

[BADGE OF HONOR]

OH NO I HAVE OFFENDED YOU, DO YOU HAVE ASPBERGERS TOO?

[Requia ☣]

Yes.  I've also had 10 goddamn years of therapy to let me be a functional human being.  So don't tell me its a 'lack of practice'.

[BADGE OF HONOR]

So you are not, in fact, a person with self-diagnosed Aspberger's.

[Requia ☣]

No, I was diagnosed by one of the shrinks when i was ten or so.  (Not sure exactly when, my parents didn't explain why I was going to all the social skills classes till years later).

[BADGE OF HONOR]

Then there's no reason for you to get all up in arms.

[Requia ☣]

I missed something apparently.

[East Coast Hustle]

Yes.  I've also had 10 goddamn years of therapy to let me be a functional human being.  So don't tell me its a 'lack of practice'.

so, in other words, you got lots of practice.

[Rumckle]

I missed something apparently.

I'm assuming by "assburgers" Badges meant people who self diagnose aspergers just cos they are afraid of talking to anyone, because they constantly got their lunch money stolen.

[Kai]

exactly. 
so what's the best way to do that?
upon reflection, stunning them with generosity would almost certainly creep the other person out.

what would your reaction be if an assburger came up to you and awkwardly, but frankly said that they had no social skills, and needed somebody to engage in conversation with in order to practice?  (assuming they seemed genuine about that)
might something straight forward like that at least convince you to befriend them tentatively?

Step 1. Find some people
Step 2. Attempt to communicate
Step 3. Fail at communicating
Step 4. Assess failure
Step 5. Adjust communication methods
Step 6. Repeat 1-5 till you get it right.


There is no alternative to painful practice with 99% failure and 1% success.

[Elder Iptuous]

yeah, i guess you're right.
i was just thinking that the assess failure step is the difficult part without someone to give constructive criticism.
i imagine the failure ends in 'fuck off, assburger!' most of the time, and they are unable to assess what they did wrong in order to correct it much.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

what's an assburger supposed to do in order to build social skills and confidence?
mebbe a gift will at least give the lady pause long enough that they can engage in conversation and level up a bit?

Most people with "assburgers" are just lacking practice in social skillz.

As much as I make fun of people with "assburgers", my son's best friend, who is the son of one of my best friends and who lives here on weekends, who says that I am "one of his 3 closest fathers", (I am proud to be a father to that boy!) has Aspergers, as does one of my long-term lovers' sons. This is part of the reason I can't take internet self-diagnosers seriously. Fuck them.

You could never, ever meet these kids and think they were just socially maladapted. J spends EVERY FUCKING WEEKEND with my son, who is the exact opposite of socially maladjusted. I mean, I'm his FATHER, The Enucleator is his mother, and all you have to do is come spend five minutes at my house or hers to see whether he's adequately socially exposed. Our older son is Miss I Will Kick Your Ass Fuck You Yes I Am Blonde And Stacked.

Actual Aspergers kids aren't on the net being assholes. IMO. J spends plenty of time online, but he's really thoughtful and NOT A RAGING ASSHOLE. He may not automatically pick up on people's feelings, but when you tell him, his empathy gland isn't broken. Just his antenna.