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FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST

Started by Cramulus, June 22, 2010, 02:44:42 PM

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BadBeast

Certainly the most productive. (The 'product' being liquified human gut contents) There is a great big steaming pile of human shit in the world now, with "Result of Discordian Sciences" written all over it.
Recognition for this mighty deed cannot be far away.
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

Cramulus

YESTERDAY: I CRAPPED MY PANCE FOR SCIENCE
TODAY: I AM BEGINNING MY NEW "NO ORANGE" DIET


BadBeast

Wewll, I did hear somewhere that Oranges are not the only fruit.
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

President Television

GUESS WHAT GUYS I HAD TWO MOTHERFUCKING GLASSES OF ORANGE JUICE WITH BREAKFAST THIS MORNING THAT'S RIGHT IT'S ON COCKKNOCKING GRANNYFARTS! IMMA OPEN A CAN OF TROPICANA ON YOUR CAUTERIZED ASSHOLES AND WHEN I'M DONE YOU'RE GONNA BE SO DAMN BEAT THAT YO UNCLE GON SELL YOU TO A TWELVE-ARMED CENTAUR ORANGUTAN AND SHIT ROCKS ON YOUR FACE WITH A GLOBE WHILE CRYING AND PISSING HIMSELF IN SHAME
My shit list: Stephen Harper, anarchists that complain about taxes instead of institutionalized torture, those people walking, anyone who lets a single aspect of themselves define their entire personality, salesmen that don't smoke pipes, Fredericton New Brunswick, bigots, philosophy majors, my nemesis, pirates that don't do anything, criminals without class, sociopaths, narcissists, furries, juggalos, foes.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: CAPTAIN SLACK on June 23, 2010, 03:56:19 PM
GUESS WHAT GUYS I HAD TWO MOTHERFUCKING GLASSES OF ORANGE JUICE WITH BREAKFAST THIS MORNING THAT'S RIGHT IT'S ON COCKKNOCKING GRANNYFARTS! IMMA OPEN A CAN OF TROPICANA ON YOUR CAUTERIZED ASSHOLES AND WHEN I'M DONE YOU'RE GONNA BE SO DAMN BEAT THAT YO UNCLE GON SELL YOU TO A TWELVE-ARMED CENTAUR ORANGUTAN AND SHIT ROCKS ON YOUR FACE WITH A GLOBE WHILE CRYING AND PISSING HIMSELF IN SHAME

I think the oranges need to be eaten rather than imbibed.
Also, how large of a glass?
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

President Television

Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 23, 2010, 04:00:36 PM
Quote from: CAPTAIN SLACK on June 23, 2010, 03:56:19 PM
GUESS WHAT GUYS I HAD TWO MOTHERFUCKING GLASSES OF ORANGE JUICE WITH BREAKFAST THIS MORNING THAT'S RIGHT IT'S ON COCKKNOCKING GRANNYFARTS! IMMA OPEN A CAN OF TROPICANA ON YOUR CAUTERIZED ASSHOLES AND WHEN I'M DONE YOU'RE GONNA BE SO DAMN BEAT THAT YO UNCLE GON SELL YOU TO A TWELVE-ARMED CENTAUR ORANGUTAN AND SHIT ROCKS ON YOUR FACE WITH A GLOBE WHILE CRYING AND PISSING HIMSELF IN SHAME

I think the oranges need to be eaten rather than imbibed.
Also, how large of a glass?

My shit list: Stephen Harper, anarchists that complain about taxes instead of institutionalized torture, those people walking, anyone who lets a single aspect of themselves define their entire personality, salesmen that don't smoke pipes, Fredericton New Brunswick, bigots, philosophy majors, my nemesis, pirates that don't do anything, criminals without class, sociopaths, narcissists, furries, juggalos, foes.

Nephew Twiddleton

Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Cramulus

how many did you eat yesterday, badbeast? 14?

BadBeast

#128
Yeah, but they were Tangerines. Butyou win, hands down, because you got the most relevant results!
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

President Television

Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 23, 2010, 04:09:59 PM
What's the pulp content like?

Low pulp, I admit. But I had an actual orange just now.
My shit list: Stephen Harper, anarchists that complain about taxes instead of institutionalized torture, those people walking, anyone who lets a single aspect of themselves define their entire personality, salesmen that don't smoke pipes, Fredericton New Brunswick, bigots, philosophy majors, my nemesis, pirates that don't do anything, criminals without class, sociopaths, narcissists, furries, juggalos, foes.

Zyzyx

THIS THREAD AMG I AM AT WORK AND WILL DIE LAUGHING

I am getting a bag of oranges and bringing them home. I once ate half a large grocery bag full of satsumas in a day. Any citrus from then on tasted metallic and bitter until the lining in my mouth (and stomach) had a chance to heal. Good golly miss molly I shat like a flaming crude hurricane.

Get ready for GLORIOUS BATTLE once I'm safe at home with my materials. By materials I mean oranges.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: CAPTAIN SLACK on June 23, 2010, 04:44:04 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 23, 2010, 04:09:59 PM
What's the pulp content like?

Low pulp, I admit. But I had an actual orange just now.

Yeah, I think you'd need actual oranges. Low-pulp OJ isn't going to test your intestinal fortitude on a level that Cram had to deal with.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Zyzyx on June 23, 2010, 05:12:00 PM
THIS THREAD AMG I AM AT WORK AND WILL DIE LAUGHING

I am getting a bag of oranges and bringing them home. I once ate half a large grocery bag full of satsumas in a day. Any citrus from then on tasted metallic and bitter until the lining in my mouth (and stomach) had a chance to heal. Good golly miss molly I shat like a flaming crude hurricane.

Get ready for GLORIOUS BATTLE once I'm safe at home with my materials. By materials I mean oranges.

Nigels the one to beat number wise
Cram is the one to beat results wise
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Zyzyx

How many did Nigel get down? I'm not going to skip lunch, but I've been eating a lot of heavy food recently (spaghetti sauce and sushi mmm) so a citric acid reverse-enema may be a good idea.

Good idea. Yeah.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Zyzyx on June 23, 2010, 05:22:53 PM
How many did Nigel get down? I'm not going to skip lunch, but I've been eating a lot of heavy food recently (spaghetti sauce and sushi mmm) so a citric acid reverse-enema may be a good idea.

Good idea. Yeah.

She polished off 12, and I think she stopped there only to top Suu's 11.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS