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FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST

Started by Cramulus, June 22, 2010, 02:44:42 PM

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Triple Zero

Quote from: Waffle Iron on January 18, 2012, 04:10:44 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 17, 2012, 09:17:50 PM
The only good thing that came of this was that we turned Waffle Iron into a Murriken by means of senseless gluttony.

What the cock is a Murriken? Some sort of Tusconian Merkin?

I told you, it's a phonetic spelling of "Moroccan"!
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

Fractalbeard

Quote from: Net on January 18, 2012, 12:13:05 AM
Quote from: Nast on January 17, 2012, 08:38:51 AM
Oh gosh Net! Glad you're alive.

Was it a stomach ulcer?

It most likely wasn't an ulcer. I had been taking a lot, but not excessive amounts, of ibuprofen last week which I now know weakens the lining of your stomach. There were two different doctors' opinions on what was bleeding, either my stomach or my esophagus (from barfing up such a large quantity of fibrous matter).

I just slept for about 18 hours, feel even better today and am preparing to go to work.

Again, thank you all for expressing your concern and support which was relayed to me yesterday by Cram.

I'm still composing a little debriefing that I'll post tonight after my shift is over, as well as responses to the superb posts that I don't have time right now to properly show my appreciation for.

I'm also still chuckling.

I'm glad to hear you're feeling better dude!

You win, btw. :)
Any technology distinguishable from magic is insuficiently advanced.

Freeky

Quote from: Slurrealist on January 18, 2012, 02:02:02 PM
I know that causing a lot of physical harm to your body is one of the ways to get out from one of the biggest BIPs

Excuse me, what in the shitcocking fuck are you talking about?

Don Coyote

Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on January 18, 2012, 07:47:30 PM
Quote from: Slurrealist on January 18, 2012, 02:02:02 PM
I know that causing a lot of physical harm to your body is one of the ways to get out from one of the biggest BIPs

Excuse me, what in the shitcocking fuck are you talking about?

Killing yourself. I think.

Freeky

Quote from: Don Coyote on January 18, 2012, 07:48:43 PM
Quote from: The Freeky of SCIENCE! on January 18, 2012, 07:47:30 PM
Quote from: Slurrealist on January 18, 2012, 02:02:02 PM
I know that causing a lot of physical harm to your body is one of the ways to get out from one of the biggest BIPs

Excuse me, what in the shitcocking fuck are you talking about?

Killing yourself. I think.

I didn't want to make a judgement before, but I am now on the official position "Slurrealist says FUCKING RETARDED things."

Cramulus

The FUCKING ORANGE EATING CONTEST isn't an explicit rebellion against the BIP, but I can definitely see how it can work that way. You definitely have to mute your own aversions in order to place in the finals. When I was eating my sixth orange, a wave of nausea washed over me. I told myself, "Mmm, this orange is delicious" --- and lo, it was delicious.


from Illuminatus----




Two months thereafter, the stock market crashed and New York millionaires began leaping from high windows onto hard streets. Old Drake, the next day, ran into his son begging on the street near the Old Granary cemetery. The boy was wearing old clothes from a secondhand store.

"It's not that bad, son. We'll pull through."

"Oh, I know that. You'll come out ahead, in fact, if I'm any judge of character."

"Then what the hell is this disgraceful damned foolishness?"

"Experience. I'm breaking out of a trap."

The old man fumed all the way back to the bank. That evening he decided it was time for another open and honest discussion; when he went to Robert's room, however, he found the boy thoroughly trussed up in chains and quite purple in the face.

"God! Damn! Son! What is this?"

The boy— who was twenty-seven and, in some respects, more sophisticated than his father— grinned and relaxed.

The purple faded from his face. "One of Houdini's escapes," he explained simply.

"You intend to become a stage magician? My God!"

"Not at all. I'm breaking out of another trap— the one that says nobody but Houdini can do these things."

Old Drake, to do him justice, hadn't acquired his wealth without some shrewdness concerning human peculiarities. "I begin to see," he said heavily. "Pain is a trap. That was why you put the broken glass in your shoes that time. Fear of poverty is a trap. That's why you tried begging on the streets. You're trying to become a Superman, like those crazy boys in Chicago, the 'thrill killers.' What you did to that whore last year was part of all this. What else have you done?"

"A lot." Robert shrugged. "Enough to be canonized as a saint, or to be burnt as a diabolist. None of it seems to add up, though. I still haven't found the way." He suddenly made a new effort, and the chains slipped to the floor. "Simple yoga and muscle control," he said without pride. "The chains in the mind are much harder. I wish there were a chemical, a key to the nervous system . . ."

Slurrealist

I think I will need to explain myself clearer.
What I meant was "I know that causing a lot of harm to your body is one of the ways to achieve transcendental states of consciousness, but this is fucking insane," but using the BIP metaphor, with the "achieve transcendental sates of consciousness" replaced to "get out from the one of the biggest BIPs", aka reality. (If you still don't understand, see the etymology of the word "trance"). Apparently, it didn't worked as I intended. It was some stupid sarcastic sentence, and I am perfectly aware that the orange eating contest is just a fun activity you do here sometimes, though the results of the last one aren't fun at all.
Sorry for the misunderstanding.
About the fucking retard, I can say that that is an objectively supported statement, because the last time I took an IQ test, my score had been only 2. No kidding.
"You're free, and freedom is beautiful. It will take time to restore chaos...but we will..."

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Slurrealist on January 18, 2012, 09:54:31 PM
I think I will need to explain myself clearer.
What I meant was "I know that causing a lot of harm to your body is one of the ways to achieve transcendental states of consciousness, but this is fucking insane," but using the BIP metaphor, with the "achieve transcendental sates of consciousness" replaced to "get out from the one of the biggest BIPs", aka reality. (If you still don't understand, see the etymology of the word "trance"). Apparently, it didn't worked as I intended. It was some stupid sarcastic sentence, and I am perfectly aware that the orange eating contest is just a fun activity you do here sometimes, though the results of the last one aren't fun at all.
Sorry for the misunderstanding.
About the fucking retard, I can say that that is an objectively supported statement, because the last time I took an IQ test, my score had been only 2. No kidding.

Waitwaitwait

Who said the results of the last one weren't fun?
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Cainad (dec.)

Quote from: Nigel on January 18, 2012, 10:08:34 PM
Quote from: Slurrealist on January 18, 2012, 09:54:31 PM
I think I will need to explain myself clearer.
What I meant was "I know that causing a lot of harm to your body is one of the ways to achieve transcendental states of consciousness, but this is fucking insane," but using the BIP metaphor, with the "achieve transcendental sates of consciousness" replaced to "get out from the one of the biggest BIPs", aka reality. (If you still don't understand, see the etymology of the word "trance"). Apparently, it didn't worked as I intended. It was some stupid sarcastic sentence, and I am perfectly aware that the orange eating contest is just a fun activity you do here sometimes, though the results of the last one aren't fun at all.
Sorry for the misunderstanding.
About the fucking retard, I can say that that is an objectively supported statement, because the last time I took an IQ test, my score had been only 2. No kidding.

Waitwaitwait

Who said the results of the last one weren't fun?

Yeah, FUCK YUO

I had 21 oranges INSIDE OF MY BODY ALL AT ONCE


didn't shit all day, didn't puke until 6 am the next morning


If that's not quality entertainment, then you're a masticated dick trapeze

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Cainad on January 18, 2012, 10:13:43 PM
Quote from: Nigel on January 18, 2012, 10:08:34 PM
Quote from: Slurrealist on January 18, 2012, 09:54:31 PM
I think I will need to explain myself clearer.
What I meant was "I know that causing a lot of harm to your body is one of the ways to achieve transcendental states of consciousness, but this is fucking insane," but using the BIP metaphor, with the "achieve transcendental sates of consciousness" replaced to "get out from the one of the biggest BIPs", aka reality. (If you still don't understand, see the etymology of the word "trance"). Apparently, it didn't worked as I intended. It was some stupid sarcastic sentence, and I am perfectly aware that the orange eating contest is just a fun activity you do here sometimes, though the results of the last one aren't fun at all.
Sorry for the misunderstanding.
About the fucking retard, I can say that that is an objectively supported statement, because the last time I took an IQ test, my score had been only 2. No kidding.

Waitwaitwait

Who said the results of the last one weren't fun?

Yeah, FUCK YUO

I had 21 oranges INSIDE OF MY BODY ALL AT ONCE


didn't shit all day, didn't puke until 6 am the next morning


If that's not quality entertainment, then you're a masticated dick trapeze

PREACH IT, BROTHER

I WAS SHITTING LIGHT-YELLOW ORANGE PULP FOR A WEEK.

I know fun when I'm having it.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Cramulus

YOU WANT FUN? TRY HOSPITAL INTAKE FORUMS!

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Cramulus on January 18, 2012, 10:51:52 PM
YOU WANT FUN? TRY HOSPITAL INTAKE FORUMS!

BLEEDING FROM THE MOUTH-HOLE IS GOOD TIMES!
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Cramulus

"Extreme Illness" is the 2012 extreme sport. You get sick in an awful, unpleasant way, for basically no reason at all.

other sports under this heading include RENAL MADNESS, the no-drink hangover, and all-night cram session benders in which you don't actually study

EXTREME SHITTING IS EXTREME FUN


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Cramulus on January 19, 2012, 12:14:22 AM
"Extreme Illness" is the 2012 extreme sport. You get sick in an awful, unpleasant way, for basically no reason at all.

other sports under this heading include RENAL MADNESS, the no-drink hangover, and all-night cram session benders in which you don't actually study

EXTREME SHITTING IS EXTREME FUN

I'm really looking forward to the Prolapse Games!
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Cramulus

at Thanksgiving, I trash talk my brothers and uncles into entering this year's 500 METER HURL. As soon as the last one of the participants is done eating, IT IS ON. This event includes several laps around the house. Dirty tricks are played. Trampoline may be in play. This contest is awful.