2020 predictions

[Cain]

..... #LadyG

What now?

"There is a homophobic republican senator who is no better than Trump who keeps passing legislation that is damaging to the lgbt and minority communities. Every sex worker I know has been hired by this man. Wondering if enough of us spoke out if that could get him out of office?"

[Junkenstein]

Graham, right? It hardly feels subtle.

[Juana]

And here's an article written by a dude claiming to have been hired as an escort by Graham. https://medium.com/@philiphuang/lindsey-graham-hired-me-as-an-escort-81d30dcf8648

🐞🐞🐞

[altered]

I want more predictions people, seriously, at this point you can say some really fucking bizarre shit and have it come true, come on

[Cain]

Tom Cotton outed as a furry.

5G actually found to spread, against all common sense, hypertrichosis (these facts may be connected).

China announces a world poetry slam, on the theme of "crushing dissent with military force is underrated".

The Pentagon reveals Bigfoot is real, but refuses to have anything to do with humanity. CNN track one down, only for it to shout "justice for Harambe" before disappearing into the woods.

The "butthole cut" of Cats is released. It is still somehow better than the Zack Snyder cut of Justice League.

[altered]

Only one of those can I say anything about with any certainty:

The butthole cut is not real. You’d get a cut of Cats with weird CG distortion around the crotch and ass, like when a mod-added Skyrim armor is built for a different skeleton. One of the folks who worked on fixing the weirdness talked about it. No butthole cut. Sorry.


And only one other can I talk about with any uncertainty:

5G causing hypertrichosis isn’t totally unrealistic. It depends what sort of irritation the body is feeling it as. There are well known chemical and environmental irritants that fuck with body hair, most often thinning or destroying it but definitely more than one promotes it. This one would not be a complete and utter shock, but it would 100% become marketed as the new hair loss cure (old men strapping iPhones to their head...).

Actually, fuck it, it counts because old men strapping iPhones to their head is definitely outright insane according to everything we knew about the world two days ago.

[The Johnny]

I predict sometime, Trump will be outed as China's Communist Party puppet; it was all an accelerationist plan for chinese political hegemony that was on the horizon either way.

[chaotic neutral observer]

The United States breaks into three separate countries, Red, Blue, and Swing.

Richard Nixon wins the 2020 election as a write-in candidate.

Hong Kong physically detaches from the mainland, and through an ingenious system of flotation devices, migrates over to join Taiwan.

[Cramulus]

And here's an article written by a dude claiming to have been hired as an escort by Graham. https://medium.com/@philiphuang/lindsey-graham-hired-me-as-an-escort-81d30dcf8648

🐞🐞🐞

DELETED BY AUTHOR 

and nothing on the Wayback machine

[The Wizard Joseph]

And here's an article written by a dude claiming to have been hired as an escort by Graham. https://medium.com/@philiphuang/lindsey-graham-hired-me-as-an-escort-81d30dcf8648

🐞🐞🐞

DELETED BY AUTHOR 

and nothing on the Wayback machine

That's because They know that if shit gets much weirder The Discordian Society will win outright through sheer inertia.

[Juana]

And here's an article written by a dude claiming to have been hired as an escort by Graham. https://medium.com/@philiphuang/lindsey-graham-hired-me-as-an-escort-81d30dcf8648

DELETED BY AUTHOR 

and nothing on the Wayback machine

https://twitter.com/MysterySolvent/status/1269368665960583168?s=09 this is most of it and all of the  part. Though apparently he has come forward to say it was a joke.