Cognitive Dissonance hurts

[East Coast Hustle]

can you tell us more about this kickass hollywood deal?

I'm bound by contract not to mention specific names.  However I can say that my wife is meeting with a major studio (has been for a while) and is meeting with the producer and the financial folks tomorrow morning, for what we are pretty certain is the final contract signing.  She's selling them a trilogy of scripts and expected renumeration for her is in the multiples of millions, that's before residuals and whatnot.  There is an A list director signed on, as well as a few very big name actors.  It's gone through various revisions and changes, seeming like it is a few months away fro about 3 years now, there was a different director signed on earlier, a very respectable one but considerably lower budget and prestige than the current one and the change in directors has been a big part of the delay.

Once she gets her money we are planning to move to the West Coast and she is going to be opening her own independent production company.

well hot shit, man! congratulations to you. I would think that would vastly outweigh the break-up of an online relationship, but have no relevant experience as far as that goes.

[BabylonHoruv]

can you tell us more about this kickass hollywood deal?

I'm bound by contract not to mention specific names.  However I can say that my wife is meeting with a major studio (has been for a while) and is meeting with the producer and the financial folks tomorrow morning, for what we are pretty certain is the final contract signing.  She's selling them a trilogy of scripts and expected renumeration for her is in the multiples of millions, that's before residuals and whatnot.  There is an A list director signed on, as well as a few very big name actors.  It's gone through various revisions and changes, seeming like it is a few months away fro about 3 years now, there was a different director signed on earlier, a very respectable one but considerably lower budget and prestige than the current one and the change in directors has been a big part of the delay.

Once she gets her money we are planning to move to the West Coast and she is going to be opening her own independent production company.

well hot shit, man! congratulations to you. I would think that would vastly outweigh the break-up of an online relationship, but have no relevant experience as far as that goes.

By all reasonable expectations it should.  The fact that it isn't is part of what is confusing me.

Oh, and thank you.

[BabylonHoruv]

Is it Waterworld 2? 

heh, no.  I kinda hope the screenwriter for that is being paid less than my wife is.

[BabylonHoruv]

Wait, wait, wait, so you are (or were) having a cyber-affair?  Really?  

Affair is not the right word for it.  Affair suggests that my wife doesn't know about it.  She does, and really likes the girlfriend.  She's the only person I've been able to talk to about the difficulties that led up to the breakup.  Which feels really weird mind you, but is still better than not having anyone to talk to about it.  

That's rough man, I don't know what it's like to be in a relationship like that, but I don't think it would change the horrible feeling of getting dumped.

I found that after my divorce that just sitting with my blues and letting it run its course helped me get it over with much quicker.

On the flip side, congratulations on having a soon-to-be rich Sugar Momma.

Thank you for condolences and congratulations both.  I believe in the future i am going to be spending much less time on the internet (due to having a rich sugar momma and money to do real thigns) so this is much less likely to happen in this manner in the future.

[Placid Dingo]

Obviously I don't know the details but the immediate thought is;

I don't put any stock in things happening for a reason etc. BUT, if you were inclined to look for that pattern you may well be able to find it. In other worlds, this could all be a Good Thing, if you want it to be.

And obviously it will hurt for a while too. Don't kick yourself over feeling crap, just ride it out.

[Cramulus]

so how is this thing developing, Babylon? You guys tearing up Hollywood yet?

[Penumbral]

Seriously I say cough syrup (protip I mix it with mezcal) just not too much. Chill out use your pain and see what happens next.

Will you still get to communicate with your now Internet ex?

[BabylonHoruv]

so how is this thing developing, Babylon? You guys tearing up Hollywood yet?

Nope, things got delayed again.  Fuckin hollywood, it's always in a few months, except when it's in a few days.

[BabylonHoruv]

Seriously I say cough syrup (protip I mix it with mezcal) just not too much. Chill out use your pain and see what happens next.

Will you still get to communicate with your now Internet ex?

Yep, we still communicate.  It's confusing and kinda hurts to talk to her, but I can't resist.

[Penumbral]

Seriously I say cough syrup (protip I mix it with mezcal) just not too much. Chill out use your pain and see what happens next.

Will you still get to communicate with your now Internet ex?

Yep, we still communicate.  It's confusing and kinda hurts to talk to her, but I can't resist.

Sorry for being naive, but what has actually changed between you and her? Is she just telling you she no longer wants to cyber, or is there more to having an Internet girlfriend? 

[BabylonHoruv]

Seriously I say cough syrup (protip I mix it with mezcal) just not too much. Chill out use your pain and see what happens next.

Will you still get to communicate with your now Internet ex?

Yep, we still communicate.  It's confusing and kinda hurts to talk to her, but I can't resist.

Sorry for being naive, but what has actually changed between you and her? Is she just telling you she no longer wants to cyber, or is there more to having an Internet girlfriend? 

Well, just like with a RT Girlfriend it's kinda complex.  Things are simply not the same as they used to be.  Cybering is certainly part of it, but, for me anyways, the fact she doesn't want me to claim her as mine to anyone hurts as much, or more.  While we were still together we could generally pull each other out of even the worst moods, that's not the case any longer and that hurts too.

[Penumbral]

Seriously I say cough syrup (protip I mix it with mezcal) just not too much. Chill out use your pain and see what happens next.

Will you still get to communicate with your now Internet ex?

Yep, we still communicate.  It's confusing and kinda hurts to talk to her, but I can't resist.

Sorry for being naive, but what has actually changed between you and her? Is she just telling you she no longer wants to cyber, or is there more to having an Internet girlfriend? 

Well, just like with a RT Girlfriend it's kinda complex.  Things are simply not the same as they used to be.  Cybering is certainly part of it, but, for me anyways, the fact she doesn't want me to claim her as mine to anyone hurts as much, or more.  While we were still together we could generally pull each other out of even the worst moods, that's not the case any longer and that hurts too.

Yep sounds like it will probably suck for a little while. I would try some bullshit advice like change can be good, or not understanding whats going on with other people, but I don't like talking about things I don't know. I wish you the best.

[BabylonHoruv]

Seriously I say cough syrup (protip I mix it with mezcal) just not too much. Chill out use your pain and see what happens next.

Will you still get to communicate with your now Internet ex?

Yep, we still communicate.  It's confusing and kinda hurts to talk to her, but I can't resist.

Sorry for being naive, but what has actually changed between you and her? Is she just telling you she no longer wants to cyber, or is there more to having an Internet girlfriend? 

Well, just like with a RT Girlfriend it's kinda complex.  Things are simply not the same as they used to be.  Cybering is certainly part of it, but, for me anyways, the fact she doesn't want me to claim her as mine to anyone hurts as much, or more.  While we were still together we could generally pull each other out of even the worst moods, that's not the case any longer and that hurts too.

Yep sounds like it will probably suck for a little while. I would try some bullshit advice like change can be good, or not understanding whats going on with other people, but I don't like talking about things I don't know. I wish you the best.

thanks.

So far I am counting the DXM trip as a positive, since it gave me some fun insights about Xochiquetzal.  I also got a poem out of it (not sure if it is any good or not, but I think it is)  And I don't write poems at all prolifically, so I think that is a good thing.