ITT: I am camped out in the middle of nowhere, but there is somehow Internet...

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

I am in the middle of nowhere. Also, I brought beer and an awesome tent from ALPS Mountaineering (if you're kooking for an awesome tent on the cheap, ALPS is the way to go).

Anyways, I turned my phone on for shits and giggles (mostly to play Angry Birds) and I found that I somehow have 3G reception.

So, ask me anything.

[Adios]

Then you are nowhere near the middle of nowhere. I can show you where that place is.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Get out of there now.
It means that there are extraterrestrials in the area logging on an looking at  porn. Book it before they find you and reenact some of that porn.

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

What kind of beer do you have?

Also, what kind of porn do you watch on a tiny phone screen in the middle of nowhere?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

What kind of beer do you have?

Also, what kind of porn do you watch on a tiny phone screen in the middle of nowhere?

BBW

[the last yatto]

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Well, I mean... of course. Fills up the screen, like.

[East Coast Hustle]

ANAL?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

ANAL?

eventually, yeah. As long as it's not ATM. small screen will not fix horrible.

[Triple Zero]

Do you have Wireshark installed? Do some packet sniffing, see if there's other people nearby in the middle of your nowhere and tell them to go to their own middle of nowhere damn bitches.

[Payne]

G7P: Have you fought and defeated a bear hand to hand yet? Have you acidentally on purpose married a sibling? Are you making your own moonshine and shooting at Guv'mint types who come knocking on your (tent)door? Have you misdirected a hen to an incorrect location?

~~~Payne: Doesn't believe you are in the middle of nowhere at all...

[AFK]

So, does it make a sound? 

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

Get out of there now.
It means that there are extraterrestrials in the area logging on an looking at  porn. Book it before they find you and reenact some of that porn.

I was using their wireless to look at porn, we had a circlejerk when they found me.

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

What kind of beer do you have?

Also, what kind of porn do you watch on a tiny phone screen in the middle of nowhere?

Steel Reserve and Becks.

Pterodactyl porn.

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

ANAL?

The aliens beat you to it.