Eris

[gnimbley]

*eyes gnimbley*


*hears wedding bells*

I think fluffy has plans for you.

[Delusion]

*eyes gnimbley*


*hears wedding bells*

*Raises his hands to the sky.  The lightning fails to strike*

Bugger.  My weather machine's gone out again.

*plugs in a seventy-foot tesla coil*

*flips the switch*

By the power vested in me by PG&E, the Diablo Canyon Generating Plant, the Right Windy Reverend Sun Myung Moon, and the San Andreas Fault, I hereby declare you...*rummages through instawedding manual*
Lessee..  Count and Victim...  no, doesn't fit...  Gnome and Metaphorical Harlot of Babylon...  no, that doesn't fit either...
*flips through*  I already used Stabby Ninja and Girl With Metal Things in Her Face.  
Stabby Ninja and Fluffy Bunny...  should remember that one for later...  Stabby Ninja and outsized arthropod and/or household appliance...  who the hell wrote this thing, anyhow?  Someone with a grudge against stabby ninjas?

Um, anyway,...  I now pronounce you...  Gnome and Fuck Toy.

You may now kiss the beard.  Er, bride.

*a stray discharge from the coil hits the bright pink manual, melting the little US flag in
pink-and-lavendar with hearts instead of stars on the cover*.

:twisted:

Who's next?

[Delusion]

Having read the US Code as releviticized by the so-called "Defense of Marriage Amendment" (whose actual text reads "It shall be the policy of the United States that marriage is between one heterosexual and another heterosexual, and further that any person who casts aspersions on the singing voice of the Attorney General is to be stripped of his citizenship and cast to the wild peccaries.  This supercedes all existing legislation anywhere."), I have determined that there is no requirement that all (or any, for that matter) participants be willing.

That being the case...

*Raises his hands to the sky as lighting strokes*

"By the power vested in me by the Sacred Pumelo Clench, a registered faith-based organization, I hereby pronounce you Stabby Ninja and Girl With Metal Things In Her Face.  You may now kiss the bride, groom, or whomever."

                   


good fucking lord

#include "maniacal/cackling.h"

   

Sorry.  It had to be done.  The alternative would be letting people run around not getting married until they want to, and everyone knows that that discourages procreation, hence permitting impoverished third world countries to run circles around the US in both birth and infant mortality rates.

[gnimbley]

ROTFL

::eyes Fuck Toy::

I really kinda of liked Gnome and Metaphorical Harlot of Babylon. Has a nice ring to it.

[Malaul]

looks like the fortune cookie was right.

What are the rest of you going to get them for wedding presents?

a good divorce attourny

I think this is the funniest thing Ive read in years



                                       

[Geno0562]

Weddings are not of the path.

[Rev Thwack]

yes, but sometimes an appropriatly placed ass kicking can be.



of course, spellcheck is not of my path.

[Delusion]

Weddings are not of the path.

No, but they *are* of the Book.

*points out chapter and verse: Heretics 6:9:

"For the duty of the oxen is to tread the corn,
and the duty of the foxen is to prod the vixen,
and the duty of the path is to be trod by the righteous,
verily, therefore, what is the duty of life?"

Clearly, that indicates that the Path is of the Book.
To reject the Book is to reject the Path.
To reject the Path is to wander endlessly in the flower-fields.
Flowers are plant genitalia.

THEREFORE, by the Powers Vested in me by the fact that I am Not Wearing
Pants Under My Robe, and the Shiny Things that my lovely assistants are
pointing in the general direction of anyone who fails to Defend Marriage
by properly engaging in it in a prompt and timely fashion...

Um.  There's only ONE of you.  The Amendment clearly requires TWO people.

*signals to the bailiffs, who begin to search the crowd of audiencemembers
for qualified targets.*

[~~~~Closed~~~~]

[Geno]
The book is not of the path
[/Geno]

[Delusion]

[Geno]
The book is not of the path
[/Geno]

But the Path is of the Book.

[fluffy]

the path leads to the brook, which is babbling

[Verthaine]

hey guys, anyone know where I left my time ray? Looking to go thru and regress this guy back to his CC stage.

Not possible.  As CC killed Eric, so has CC died to become me.

Well, guess Im not married anymore... Imma widow!!!!



Who wants to be my next Hubby?        

I'll volenteer.We're both cat people.and since I am a Leo(aug.6),we can have sex 50 times a day.(lions in the wild actually do it that much)

[Marl Fublewonker]

yes, but sometimes an appropriatly placed ass kicking can be.



of course, spellcheck is not of my path.

Why am I not of your path?

[Malaul]

I'll volenteer.We're both cat people.and since I am a Leo(aug.6),we can have sex 50 times a day.(lions in the wild actually do it that much)

IM either a gemini orra pisces depending on what day you ask me,,,
that might be fun,,,

::packs bags for New Orleans::

[Horab Fibslager]

I'll volenteer.We're both cat people.and since I am a Leo(aug.6),we can have sex 50 times a day.(lions in the wild actually do it that much)

IM either a gemini orra pisces depending on what day you ask me,,,
that might be fun,,,

::packs bags for New Orleans::

it's strange. whiel ebign a masturbation enthusiast would imply that i'm down to get busy with it at teh drop fo a hat, the whole nine yards takes an awful lot of work on my part, and that tends toeb where i get my thrills from.