How Discordianism Got Me a Free Cup of Coffee

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Dunkins doesn't have the rep out here that it does on the East Coast...we have just as many mom n pop donut places and Yum Yum Donuts as we do Dunkin.  Starbucks drive-thrus...now THOSE we have in SPADES.  And I *have* gotten free coffee from those, because I forgot my wallet, and I had 3 kids in the back of my car.  When I explained to them what happened and I just needed to "drive-thru" without ordering, they insisted on  giving me something for the kids at the very least, without paying.

Twas verra nice.

A driver through starbucks?
A whole new world has just opened up to me.

Many are drive-thrus out here in CA.  Oftentimes we have a drive-thru across the parking lot from one that's in a shopping center. 

We have a drive thru McDonalds in town- the next nearest drive-thru is about half an hour down the roou have to get a 'different' drive thru you have to drive about an hour to the nearest city for a KFC.

I have honestly never seen any drivethru besides MCD's and KFC... Though Lincolnshire has been left back in the 1800s so I should be grateful for them really

Wouldn't have killed them to ask him to clarify either.  "One small cup of coffee, medium cream, regular flavor.  Is that correct?"

You know, it's odd for me as a Bostonian, since here, regular means exactly what you say with size specification, but if I go in and ask for that I'll go in and say, "I'll have a [size] coffee with cream and sugar." Of course, at Dunks, "with sugar" means 20% of this must be sugar.

In a home or work setting, I always drink black no sugar, but at Dunks (or at Mike's at Forest Hills) I always ask for cream and (inevitably copious amonts of) sugar. Don't know why, but that's just how I do it.

Hanni- you're English. You don't have coffee. Your coffee is crap. Take it from an Irishman who happens to have been born and raised in Real Boston^TM. You just can't get real coffee outside of the European mainland. That's one thing Dan Brown got right. I mean fuck, he's a New Englander too.

Badbeast- that's an invite to our usual coffee vs. tea arguments.

I don't like coffee- English tea kicks ass though. Can't beat it with just a little bit of milk.

A- Drive thru coffee is awesome.
B- You don't like coffee because your coffee is crap. I've tried it. It sucks. I've been to numerous points in Ireland and Liverpool. But British tea is awesome, I agree. Earl Grey hot. American tea sucks. Blame it on us Real Bostonians^TM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boston_Tea_Party

[Hanni]

English coffee does suck (though apparently I make good coffee- according to those who drink it)

And I have heard of the Boston tea party- nothing that exciting has ever happened in Boston1. Well we locked up the Pilgrim Fathers for a while after they tried to leave without a passport.... but even that's not really exciting.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

English coffee does suck (though apparently I make good coffee- according to those who drink it)

And I have heard of the Boston tea party- nothing that exciting has ever happened in Boston1. Well we locked up the Pilgrim Fathers for a while after they tried to leave without a passport.... but even that's not really exciting.

They weren't that exciting when they got to Massachusetts either, until 1692.. but that wasn't even Boston, it was Salem/Danvers (the area is now called Danvers, even though Salem claims the history). Boston here wasn't cool until the Revolution and Virginia, of all places said, "Dudes, they're fucking over Boston with shit, let's stand with our Northern brothers."

Twid,
-Oversimplifying American history

[Doktor Howl]

I'm going to say that the coffee from Starbucks tastes EXACTLY THE SAME over here in California, than it did in Liverpool. So, um?

You are a Limey, and are thus incapable of properly enjoying the nectar of the Gods that we call "coffee".  Your tongue lacks the right taste buds, and your circulatory system is immune to the effects of any stimulant less powerful than E, because you've spent a lifetime shoveling lard into your arteries.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I'm going to say that the coffee from Starbucks tastes EXACTLY THE SAME over here in California, than it did in Liverpool. So, um?

Starbucks at least has consistency. Got the same in Liverpool myself. But generally the coffee is not even worth it. If someone in England is making you coffee, you're probably going to hear a spoon clinking repeatedly against a mug. When you hear that, cringe, grin, and accept the hospitality, then kick yourself in the ass for not asking for tea.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I'm going to say that the coffee from Starbucks tastes EXACTLY THE SAME over here in California, than it did in Liverpool. So, um?

You are a Limey, and are thus incapable of properly enjoying the nectar of the Gods that we call "coffee".  Your tongue lacks the right taste buds, and your circulatory system is immune to the effects of any stimulant less powerful than E, because you've spent a lifetime shoveling lard into your arteries.

^ This too

[Hanni]

I'm going to say that the coffee from Starbucks tastes EXACTLY THE SAME over here in California, than it did in Liverpool. So, um?

Starbucks at least has consistency. Got the same in Liverpool myself. But generally the coffee is not even worth it. If someone in England is making you coffee, you're probably going to hear a spoon clinking repeatedly against a mug. When you hear that, cringe, grin, and accept the hospitality, then kick yourself in the ass for not asking for tea.

IF you don't use a spoon... how do you make coffee *confused face*
And at least it's vaguely exciting- our claim to fames are:
1. locking up the pilgrim fathers
2. apparently the largest docks after London (for a little while a long time ago)
3. the largest parish church in England- as in... the tallest.
4. Something about always being a christmas tree by Sweden

What they don't tell you is that the church is nearly at the point of falling down and the docks are rarely used now via when we get our free christmas tree.

[Doktor Howl]

I'm going to say that the coffee from Starbucks tastes EXACTLY THE SAME over here in California, than it did in Liverpool. So, um?

Starbucks at least has consistency. Got the same in Liverpool myself. But generally the coffee is not even worth it. If someone in England is making you coffee, you're probably going to hear a spoon clinking repeatedly against a mug. When you hear that, cringe, grin, and accept the hospitality, then kick yourself in the ass for not asking for tea.

IF you don't use a spoon... how do you make coffee *confused face*
And at least it's vaguely exciting- our claim to fames are:
1. locking up the pilgrim fathers
2. apparently the largest docks after London (for a little while a long time ago)
3. the largest parish church in England- as in... the tallest.
4. Something about always being a christmas tree by Sweden

What they don't tell you is that the church is nearly at the point of falling down and the docks are rarely used now via when we get our free christmas tree.

You people have fucking ruined Britain for me.

How'd you go and let it turn into New Jersey?

[Dysnomia]

drive thru starbucks is the best thing ever on the way to the barn in the winter, when it's raining cats and dogs and you just spent an hour chasing your horse through the mud so thick it sucked one of your boots off in the first ten minutes.

[Hanni]

I'm going to say that the coffee from Starbucks tastes EXACTLY THE SAME over here in California, than it did in Liverpool. So, um?

Starbucks at least has consistency. Got the same in Liverpool myself. But generally the coffee is not even worth it. If someone in England is making you coffee, you're probably going to hear a spoon clinking repeatedly against a mug. When you hear that, cringe, grin, and accept the hospitality, then kick yourself in the ass for not asking for tea.

IF you don't use a spoon... how do you make coffee *confused face*
And at least it's vaguely exciting- our claim to fames are:
1. locking up the pilgrim fathers
2. apparently the largest docks after London (for a little while a long time ago)
3. the largest parish church in England- as in... the tallest.
4. Something about always being a christmas tree by Sweden

What they don't tell you is that the church is nearly at the point of falling down and the docks are rarely used now via when we get our free christmas tree.

You people have fucking ruined Britain for me.

How'd you go and let it turn into New Jersey?

I'm going to say that the coffee from Starbucks tastes EXACTLY THE SAME over here in California, than it did in Liverpool. So, um?

Starbucks at least has consistency. Got the same in Liverpool myself. But generally the coffee is not even worth it. If someone in England is making you coffee, you're probably going to hear a spoon clinking repeatedly against a mug. When you hear that, cringe, grin, and accept the hospitality, then kick yourself in the ass for not asking for tea.

IF you don't use a spoon... how do you make coffee *confused face*
And at least it's vaguely exciting- our claim to fames are:
1. locking up the pilgrim fathers
2. apparently the largest docks after London (for a little while a long time ago)
3. the largest parish church in England- as in... the tallest.
4. Something about always being a christmas tree by Sweden

What they don't tell you is that the church is nearly at the point of falling down and the docks are rarely used now via when we get our free christmas tree.

You people have fucking ruined Britain for me.

How'd you go and let it turn into New Jersey?

It's only the boring rubbishy bit of Britain- We don't have motorways or anything... Lincolnshire is just a big flat place of nothingness where the bit of veg that isn't imported is grown.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I'm going to say that the coffee from Starbucks tastes EXACTLY THE SAME over here in California, than it did in Liverpool. So, um?

Starbucks at least has consistency. Got the same in Liverpool myself. But generally the coffee is not even worth it. If someone in England is making you coffee, you're probably going to hear a spoon clinking repeatedly against a mug. When you hear that, cringe, grin, and accept the hospitality, then kick yourself in the ass for not asking for tea.

IF you don't use a spoon... how do you make coffee *confused face*And at least it's vaguely exciting- our claim to fames are:
1. locking up the pilgrim fathers
2. apparently the largest docks after London (for a little while a long time ago)
3. the largest parish church in England- as in... the tallest.
4. Something about always being a christmas tree by Sweden

What they don't tell you is that the church is nearly at the point of falling down and the docks are rarely used now via when we get our free christmas tree.

Bolded- Just stop. You'll never understand, and no, you don't make good coffee.

The rest of it- College Town, USA. There are about 100 Universities in the Greater Boston Area (Including Boston proper, Cambridge, Somerville, etc...)
First Public school in America, first subway in America, Edgar Allen Poe, and HP Lovecraft's boner. Aerosmith before they started to suck, etc...

And, of course, non-French democracy.

[Hanni]

Coffee is 98% water, and bad water can make a difference to the taste. There's little point in learning how to make coffee, and investing in good beans and a coffee maker, if the final taste is spoiled by poor water.

Good water? I know water tastes different but does it genuinely make a difference (in your opinions as you clearly know more about the topic than I)

[Nephew Twiddleton]

You are a Limey, and are thus incapable of properly enjoying the nectar of the Gods that we call "coffee".  Your tongue lacks the right taste buds, and your circulatory system is immune to the effects of any stimulant less powerful than E, because you've spent a lifetime shoveling lard into your arteries.

HOW DID YOU KNOW!  

The main thing I think England needs from America is Malts. oh my fucking yum!

you're probably going to hear a spoon clinking repeatedly against a mug

This is a fact. Although, you do get the odd crazed coffee aficionado, who will whip out an espresso machine, or french press, and delight you with a real one once in a rare while.

Best coffee I ever had was in Holland. Mind you, for some reason, everything seemed tastier over there. Even stuff I don't usually like. I blame the holliday effect.


The main thing I'm loving about the US is you can get a hot-dog fucking anywhere. Shit. Even what passes for the newsagents round here have frigging hot-dog rotating machines and pots of quite nice coffee too.

IF you don't use a spoon... how do you make coffee *confused face*

http://www.coffeedetective.com/how-to-make-coffee.html

My father's family lives in Clifden, co. Galway. There is only one place there for an American to get coffee. And it ain't my grandfather's house.

[AFK]

Dunkins doesn't have the rep out here that it does on the East Coast...we have just as many mom n pop donut places and Yum Yum Donuts as we do Dunkin.  Starbucks drive-thrus...now THOSE we have in SPADES.  And I *have* gotten free coffee from those, because I forgot my wallet, and I had 3 kids in the back of my car.  When I explained to them what happened and I just needed to "drive-thru" without ordering, they insisted on  giving me something for the kids at the very least, without paying.

Twas verra nice.

A driver through starbucks?
A whole new world has just opened up to me.

Many are drive-thrus out here in CA.  Oftentimes we have a drive-thru across the parking lot from one that's in a shopping center. 

We have a Starbucks in the hospital that employs me.  Unfortunately, my office is off campus so I only get to partake when I have meetings.  It's probably a good thing I don't work in the hospital.  

But the one thing I've noticed, here in Maine anyway, is that the staff at Tim Hortons always seems so much more cheery and happy then the staff at DD.  The DD staff always look like they're about to keel over or they look like someone just ran over their favorite puppy.  The Tim Hortons folks are always happy and giddy, though, it's that kind of happy and giddy that makes you a little nervous.  

I'm thinking they're all Canadian androids.  

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Coffee is 98% water, and bad water can make a difference to the taste. There's little point in learning how to make coffee, and investing in good beans and a coffee maker, if the final taste is spoiled by poor water.

Good water? I know water tastes different but does it genuinely make a difference (in your opinions as you clearly know more about the topic than I)

Parallel example-
Drink Guinness from Dublin.
Then drink Guinness from Canada.
Compare.