REMINGTON, EXPLAIN YOURSELF.

[Suu]

I just purchased Canadian brand shampoo and body wash at SleezyEss on sale...wtf is this shit?! Really?! It smells like maple syrup and sweaty taint had a tropical island butt baby! If it wasn't for the fact I'm fucking broke and can't put Suave or V05 on my body anywhere without experiencing the ashiest experience of my life, I'd throw this right back over the border.

[Remington]

Canadian pancake syrup doubles as shampoo. You probably bought the 'Québécois' brand... it's rendered from actual syrup and has the cleaning power of Comet dissolved in WD40. This is because the Québécois only wash their hair on average once a year: their shampoo needs to be several order of magnitude more powerful to account for this.


Either that or you got the Tim Hortons stuff. Good luck getting the Maple Glaze^TM out of your hair.

[Suu]

Crap. I knew those Québécois were up to no good...They continue to infiltrate my life, even now, in shampoo form. 

[Remington]

Quebec: Where you can reach your daily calorie intake simply by washing your hair.