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Wiccan rape victim gets sexually assaulted by TSA

Started by Suu, November 09, 2010, 04:34:10 PM

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the last yatto

#45
November 09, 2010, 11:26:21 PM
wow so much thinking a flight to Spokane would be under a hundred dollars
Look, asshole:  Your 'incomprehensible' act, your word-salad, your pinealism...It BORES ME.  I've been incomprehensible for so long, I TEACH IT TO MBA CANDIDATES.  So if you simply MUST talk about your pineal gland or happy children dancing in the wildflowers, go talk to Roger, because he digs that kind of shit

Nephew Twiddleton

#46
November 10, 2010, 08:12:04 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 09, 2010, 07:14:33 PM
Quote from: First City Hustle on November 09, 2010, 07:13:44 PM
Since I fly quite often, I imagine this will affect me probably more than anyone else here.

I've decided to buy a very large "cheater" and demand the pat-down search. If they're gonna fondle my junk, they're at least going to come away impressed.

USE THE BLACK RUSSIAN!  IT SCARES THE SHIT OUT OF THE CLERGY TSA!

This, and cut out letters in aluminum foil and tape them to your chest to spell out "HEY LADIES!"
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

The Good Reverend Roger

#47
November 10, 2010, 08:29:21 PM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on November 10, 2010, 08:12:04 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 09, 2010, 07:14:33 PM
Quote from: First City Hustle on November 09, 2010, 07:13:44 PM
Since I fly quite often, I imagine this will affect me probably more than anyone else here.

I've decided to buy a very large "cheater" and demand the pat-down search. If they're gonna fondle my junk, they're at least going to come away impressed.

USE THE BLACK RUSSIAN!  IT SCARES THE SHIT OUT OF THE CLERGY TSA!

This, and cut out letters in aluminum foil and tape them to your chest to spell out "HEY LADIES!"

:lulz:  :lulz:  :lulz:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

#48
November 10, 2010, 08:58:56 PM
"he machine's manufacturer, Rapiscan"

Is that pronounced Rapey Scan?
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#49
November 10, 2010, 08:59:56 PM
Quote from: Ratatosk on November 10, 2010, 08:58:56 PM
"he machine's manufacturer, Rapiscan"

Is that pronounced Rapey Scan?

:lulz: It is now.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Juana

#50
November 10, 2010, 09:19:13 PM
Quote from: Ratatosk on November 10, 2010, 08:58:56 PM
"he machine's manufacturer, Rapiscan"

Is that pronounced Rapey Scan?
:lulz:


I might be traveling to Connecticut in March sometime and I'm so doing this.
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

The Android

#51
November 10, 2010, 09:20:41 PM
I can't wait until the next time I have to fly in the States... I really don't mind someone fondling my junk at all, male or female.  I am going to do my best to make certain THEY are the ones made uncomfortable by it.

"Hey, don't stop now... it was just getting good."
the artist formerly known as Hoopla

Freeky

#52
November 10, 2010, 09:25:35 PM
Try and get the searcher's name and number, then wail and cry out "I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL!" when they refuse? :lulz:

Telarus

#53
November 11, 2010, 12:19:52 AM
Quote from: Mistress Freeky, HRN on November 10, 2010, 09:25:35 PM
Try and get the searcher's name and number, then wail and cry out "I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL!" when they refuse? :lulz:

Better yet, before consenting get their Name and BADGE number. Then in the moment cry out, "OH Agent_4550917!!!!"
Telarus, KSC,
.__.  Keeper of the Contradictory Cephalopod, Zenarchist Swordsman,
(0o)  Tender to the Edible Zen Garden, Ratcheting Metallic Sex Doll of The End Times,
/||\   Episkopos of the Amorphous Dreams Cabal

Join the Doll Underground! Experience the Phantasmagorical Safari!

The Good Reverend Roger

#54
November 11, 2010, 01:08:55 AM
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Suu

#56
November 11, 2010, 01:12:37 AM
Quote from: Ratatosk on November 10, 2010, 08:58:56 PM
"he machine's manufacturer, Rapiscan"

Is that pronounced Rapey Scan?

:spittake:
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Shibboleet The Annihilator

#57
November 11, 2010, 01:15:27 AM
For any of our obese and/or geriatric posters, I strongly recommend taking flights and opting out of the scanners and then insisting on public searches and strongly encouraging your TSA agent not to neglect the fat rolls/wrinkles, as you may be concealing something.

East Coast Hustle

#58
November 11, 2010, 01:34:59 AM Last Edit: November 11, 2010, 01:36:52 AM by First City Hustle
You only say that because you're morbidly obese and confined to a rascal scooter.

ETA: No shit, I've actually met TTM/MGD/7GP and dude has got to weigh over 600 lbs. and he can STILL kick a hipster in the solar plexus from his motorized chair.
Rabid Colostomy Hole Jammer of the Coming Apocalypse™

The Devil is in the details; God is in the nuance.


Some yahoo yelled at me, saying 'GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH', and I thought, "I'm feeling generous today.  Why not BOTH?"

Shibboleet The Annihilator

#59
November 11, 2010, 01:41:43 AM Last Edit: November 11, 2010, 01:43:22 AM by Grade 7 Pannus
It's not my fault that all I can afford is calorie laden foods and it's not my fault my joints have fallen to medical problems. It's only fair that my people put themselves to use! Just because we're morbidly obese doesn't mean we're useless, as evidenced by my putting a hipster through a cinderblock wall with nothing more than my cankles and a pair of Lowa Tibets.

We're fat for freedom!
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