I think that insularity is a survival skill in the modern jungle
I confess to passing car accidents, ignoring beggars, and voting by die roll
my girlfriend Chloe is a really compassionate type. When she sees somebody suffering she really feels right alongside with them. I have met few people as charitable as her. And somehow it constantly bites her in the ass. Like for example there's this kid Frank she used to have classes with.
Frank was a little autistic and had trouble making friends. He had a bad past of being abused and manipulated. He talked frequently of killing himself. It broke Chloe's heart. She decided to be his only friend. She hung out with him every day and begun to teach him how to live. how to cook, how to make appointments, how to not sweat the little stuff...
But Frank's problems consumed Chloe's life. He was sending her over 200 text messages per day, needing her contact constantly. She spent hours checking him into suicide wards and picking him up when he got out, only to drive him back the following week. Frank's therapist couldn't handle that he seemed to require 5+ hours of therapy per day and "dumped" him. Frank told Chloe she was the only reason he wasn't killing himself. The desperate texts increased. He'd call her up at 3:30 in the morning to talk for an hour and a half about the stuff going through his mind. She couldn't take it any more.
In the end Chloe had to cut off the friendship. She didn't allow herself to feel bad about it. It steeled her in a way... it made her realize that she can't take responsibility for everybody's burden, she has to get her own shit squared away first. And in the long run it made her more hesitant to help out strangers.
I find the whole episode incredibly sad. But we live in a world full of sad, wounded animals. I'm not saying that it's acceptable to watch somebody get stabbed or have a stroke and not do anything. But if we open our hearts to everybody that needs them, we will have nothing left for ourselves. We cannot address every injustice, every malice, every bastard out there. There are too many. So we have to prioritize.