Letters to congress

[LMNO]

Share your own for copy/paste ideas and suggestions!


Dear_________,

Now that the Thanksgiving holiday is over and the hue and cry has diminished, I am writing to you to complain about the new TSA screening measures, both the pat-downs and the backscatter machines.

Obviously, there has been a lot of talk about these measures, not all of it rational.  Just to clear the air, I am not concerned about the safety of the machines—it is readily obvious that in context of the various radiations (solar and otherwise) and carcinogens we are exposed to on a daily basis, the level of ionizing radiation in the machines is minimal.  Nor am I concerned about any sort of nudity taboo.  The naked human body is not sinful, and we as a society really need to drop some of the prudish attitudes of shame and guilt we attach to it.

No, the problems I have with the TSA measures are twofold.  First, the pat-downs clearly strain the limits of the Fourth Amendment. The act of buying a plane ticket should not be considered a suspicious activity, and to consider all US citizens equally deserving of an invasive, uncomfortable search is clearly "unreasonable".  And if we consider the search to be unreasonable, it should not matter whether it is made using a TSA official's hand, or a complicated piece of technology that accomplishes the same goal.  It is the search itself, and not how it is conducted, that is objectionable.  

Secondly, these measures do not make us any safer.  While the new measures do indeed make it more inconvenient to sneak contraband onto an airplane, it seems we have forgotten that the goal of a terrorist is not grand theft aviation, it is to cause mayhem, disruption, and death in as large a theater as possible, as easily as possible.  I'm sure I don't need to go into any details more explicit than to point out that the July 4, 2009 attack in LAX took place at the ticket counter, not at the security checkpoint.  In addition to that, there are still questions as to whether a backscatter body scan would have detected the explosives of the so-called "underwear bomber", as reported in NPR and elsewhere.  Since we don't even know if these machines would be effective as a countermeasure to recent events, this is not even a case of responding to the last threat instead of the next, it is simply a fear driven slight-of-hand designed to establish an illusion of safety.

Because these new measures encroach on the Fourth Amendment while failing to decrease the likelihood of a terrorist attack, I request that you and your colleagues act to change the laws regarding TSA screenings.  Please do not let  hysteria rob us of our constitutional protections in the name of an illusion.


Your constituent,




[edit for content and spelling]

[Suu]

I like it, I'd revise the first paragraph though. Get rid of stuff on the naked body and get to the point.

[Cain]

Dear Constituent

Stop hating America.  Why do you want the terrorists to win?

Your Congress Thing,
_________

[LMNO]

I like it, I'd revise the first paragraph though. Get rid of stuff on the naked body and get to the point.

I see your point.  I was trying to speak against those who object to the scanner because of "OMG! NEKKID PICS!"

Suggestions?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Dear Constituent

Stop hating America.  Why do you want the terrorists to win?

Your Congress Thing,
_________

Less likely for us. I have a hard time seeing John Kerry sending that back. Barney Frank, maybe, but only cuz he's got personality.

[AFK]

I like it, I'd revise the first paragraph though. Get rid of stuff on the naked body and get to the point.

I see your point.  I was trying to speak against those who object to the scanner because of "OMG! NEKKID PICS!"

Suggestions?

Very well written.  I would say that it makes sense to point out you don't object on the nudity grounds but perhaps just take out the sentence talking about the issues with Americans being prudish.  It's a minor thing but it might be a bit of a letter-jack. 

[LMNO]

Cool.  Striking the last sentence.

[Cramulus]

very soundly worded

[AFK]

Also, I'm definitely putting that into a Word document and shipping it off to Collins and Snowe.  I think I'll get some sympathy from Collins.  I have it on good authority she's not a big fan of the TSA.  She's had some, shall we say, run-ins with them.  

[Suu]

I'm not even sure if T. F. Green has backscatters yet, but I know Logan does. If Green doesn't have them, this may help to stop.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Fourth Amendment, not Forth.

[LMNO]

Motherfucker.

Thanks for the catch.  I was almost gonna seal the envelopes and everything.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

Third paragraph, first line - the amendment is still the 'Forth'.

Otherwise, this is great. If it had been me I'd have thrown a bitch and whine in there about giving in to pressure by buying shit that doesn't work from people invested in the actual shit that doesn't work. And I'd probably have asked at what point the government decided to encourage sexual assault on children and adults . . . but that would not be conducive to being an adult in the conversation. I like the way you handled it, LMNO. Logical and concerned, without being a hate-filled, finger-pointing, blame-y bastard. It's a balance I have a hard time finding. :P

[The Good Reverend Roger]

On the whole, it's more effective than my idea.

Dear Congress Thing:

You can take your TSA and your "safety" and your authoritarianism, and jam it up your syphilis-pocked bunghole.  I sent you to congress to run the country, not crap all over the 4th Amendment.  Maybe you need to cut out the six martini lunches with those lobbyists and remember who the hell you're supposed to be working for.

We need the economy fixed, our infrastructure repaired, and enough power to keep the lights on in ten years, not a few senseless wars, insanity at the security checkpoints, and tampering with the US Constitution.  You get a nice salary, a guaranteed retirement, and all the congressional pages you can molest.  Now earn it.

Venomously Yours,
The Good Reverend Roger
Pastor, The First Church of the Wrath of Baby Jesus.  

TGRR,
Going to Jail.

[LMNO]

Actually, that might work in Arizona...