DM/Player Ownage

[hooplala]

I am working on a campaign based entirely on bad art, but - and this is the important thing - doing it without being silly.

Care to elaborate?

when I am more awake.

Righto.

[Brotep]

I'm five sessions into DMing my first campaign, and the suspicious nature and malign intent of the player characters makes it so wonderfully easy to create more story hooks.

I figured out the larger story of the setting a few weeks ago (it's in the Forgotten Realms, and some cool lore-based shit is going to happen), but for now the party is mostly caught up in intrigue with a group of anonymous ne'er-do-wells in this small village. They misdirected and beat up guards to seize control of one of the two guard towers in town, just for the chance to spy on what some of them have chosen to treat as nemeses 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I am working on a campaign based entirely on bad art, but - and this is the important thing - doing it without being silly.

Care to elaborate?

when I am more awake.

Righto.

Dungeon's in a painting.  You have to steal the painting for it to work, and then the PCs get hornswaggled into releasing this really nice lady who steps out of the painting and "shuts" it behind them, so they have to find another way out.  Meanwhile, she's up to no good in the city.

The lady is homely, of course, as any good looking woman in a dungeon will be immediately nuked, as anyone who has ever played the game knows.

But first, gonna start them off tomorrow at 1st level, on a rescue mission.  Some kids get kidnapped, and the PCs go to rescue them as mercs.  The boss of the kidnapping ring is a "painted creation" jerk from the painting (using the the painted creation template from the old U1 Galleries of Evil over a 2nd level warrior thug), who has been sent there by another lady from the painting demiplane.

I decided the ladies are all sisters, there are 9 of them, and they all have a mythic tier, just to make them obnoxious.  It won't be obvious, but each of them reflects one of the nine alignments.

The one the PCs release, and will eventually get around to fighting at level 9 or so is this monstrosity:

Lady Sophia De Chaise   CR 11
XP 12,800
Female Mythic Human Rogue 6/Assassin 3/Trickster
LE Medium humanoid (human)
Init +3; Perception +13

Defense
AC 22 Touch 15 Flat-Footed 18   (+6 Armor, +3 Dex, +1 Deflection, +1 Dodge, Natural +1) +4 Dodge when provoking AOOs by movement.
HP  81 (9d8+37)
Fort 6, Ref 9, Will 5
Defensive Abilities Evasion, Trapsense +2, Improved Uncanny Dodge

Offense
Spd 30 ft
Melee Death's Pinky Finger +13/+8 (1d4+3 plus poison, 19x2)
Special Attacks Death Attack, whirlwind attack +13

Tactics
Before Combat Sophia turns invisible to gauge her enemies and prepare a death attack.
During Combat Sophia will alternate between the above and moving in with her runner's shirt and conducting a whirlwind attack.
Morale If Sophia is brought below 30 HPs, she will escape and plot her vengeance.


Statistics
Str 11, Dex 16, Con 14, Int 14, Wis 12, Cha 14
Base Attack +6; CMB +7; CMD 20
Feats Dodge, Mobility, Spring Attack, weapon focus (dagger), weapon finesse, toughness, weapon Expertise, whirlwind Attack, Mythic Spring Attack
Skills Acrobatics +15, Appraise +11, Bluff +14, Diplomacy +11, Disable Device +20, Disguise +24, Knowledge (local) +14, Perception +13, Sense Motive +13, Stealth +15, Use Magic Device +14
   Bonuses +3 Perception Vs traps
SQ Sneak attack +5d6, Poison Use, Trapfinding +3, Rogue Talents (Combat Trick, Finesse Rogue, Favored Class Rogue (hps).
Mythic Abilities Hard to Kill, Mythic Power 5/day, Surge +1d6, Surprise Strike, Thwart Detection
Languages Taldane, Aklo, Draconic
Gear  Masterwork thieves tools, Hat of Disguise, Ring of Invisibility, Ring of Protection +1, quick Runner's Shirt, +3 studded leather armor (glammered), Amulet of Natural Armor +1, 3 potions of Cure Serious wounds, Sustaining Spoon, Death's Pinky Finger

Special Abilities/Items
Death's Pinky Finger This dagger is a +3 dagger of venom that is always considered poisoned.  It's default poison is greenblood oil, but the user can reset it as a standard action that does not provoke attacks of opportunity to any poison that the wielder has ever failed a saving throw against. (note:  Sophia has poisoned herself with every poison in the core rule book, and will use the poison that best suits the moment.)

(Note:  Sophia's CR reflects her mythic status, her stat line, and her wealth)

That's a rogue that goes invisible, whirlwinds (no sneak attack while whirlwinding, but you can't have it all), with a blade that's always poisoned for con damage.  Then she goes invisible again.  Also, check out the disguise ability.  She's good enough to impersonate the PCs best friends (or the PCs, ho ho ho) while she goes about her nefarious deeds.  And then she impersonates the cleric when they go to get healed.

Anyway, while they're stuck in the painting, they have to deal with dadaist barbarians (confusion ability like the old umber hulk, on account of, well, dadaist appearance), homicidal critics, etc.  And some of the other sisters.

And anyone who gets killed in the painting gets their soul stuck in the Chamber of Unverified Teapots until someone comes and breaks them out.

So far, I've got the material done for about levels 1-5 on the medium track.  I expect this campaign to go to about level 15.



 

[Don Coyote]

This sounds both good and familiar.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

This sounds both good and familiar.

1st session over.  They chased down the kidnapped girls, dealt with the thugs that kidnapped her (including the painted creation, who went down like a damn punk), and then stole the painting from an archmage's house.  They even remarked on how suspiciously easy the theft was.

Then they went in and let the woman go, and she obligingly trapped them in the maze.  Left off there.

Now it's custom monster theater.  Not one single critter is taken from books unchanged, and most of them are unique builds. Among other things, I am using the Red Tape Dude from Little Orange.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I'm five sessions into DMing my first campaign, and the suspicious nature and malign intent of the player characters makes it so wonderfully easy to create more story hooks.

I figured out the larger story of the setting a few weeks ago (it's in the Forgotten Realms, and some cool lore-based shit is going to happen), but for now the party is mostly caught up in intrigue with a group of anonymous ne'er-do-wells in this small village. They misdirected and beat up guards to seize control of one of the two guard towers in town, just for the chance to spy on what some of them have chosen to treat as nemeses 

Attacking the town guard, eh?  If you can't use that like Junkenstien uses a crowbar, hang it up.

They are obviously desperadoes and now outlaws.  They should start seeing wanted posters of themselves soon.  Bounty hunters are a thing.

[The Wizard Joseph]

I'm five sessions into DMing my first campaign, and the suspicious nature and malign intent of the player characters makes it so wonderfully easy to create more story hooks.

I figured out the larger story of the setting a few weeks ago (it's in the Forgotten Realms, and some cool lore-based shit is going to happen), but for now the party is mostly caught up in intrigue with a group of anonymous ne'er-do-wells in this small village. They misdirected and beat up guards to seize control of one of the two guard towers in town, just for the chance to spy on what some of them have chosen to treat as nemeses 

Attacking the town guard, eh?  If you can't use that like Junkenstien uses a crowbar, hang it up.

They are obviously desperadoes and now outlaws.  They should start seeing wanted posters of themselves soon.  Bounty hunters are a thing.

Also worth mentioning that the guard could have been a valued asset to a local crime syndicate or guild, also family ties or perhaps lover now UPSET, or the only good factor holding someone or something from taking more bold actions.

Killing cops is just bad.

[Brotep]

I'm five sessions into DMing my first campaign, and the suspicious nature and malign intent of the player characters makes it so wonderfully easy to create more story hooks.

I figured out the larger story of the setting a few weeks ago (it's in the Forgotten Realms, and some cool lore-based shit is going to happen), but for now the party is mostly caught up in intrigue with a group of anonymous ne'er-do-wells in this small village. They misdirected and beat up guards to seize control of one of the two guard towers in town, just for the chance to spy on what some of them have chosen to treat as nemeses 

Attacking the town guard, eh?  If you can't use that like Junkenstien uses a crowbar, hang it up.

They are obviously desperadoes and now outlaws.  They should start seeing wanted posters of themselves soon.  Bounty hunters are a thing.

There were these guys in suits, who introduced themselves by the name of their pattern of choice (Argyle, Paisley, and Gingham), lying and cajoling the party into doing their bidding--but consistently paying. The party's half-orc monk (he's a conflicted dude) got pissed at being duped and ran to confront them alone. He's going to wake up in a pine box. Another party member, a gnomish drug dealer, tried to out the "suits" to one of the guards after beating the guard within an inch of his life. An arrow from elsewhere finished the job, and now there's an investigation underway.

Mostly the suits have been using them for a harassment campaign that culminated in an assassination of someone who left their ranks. That's the only reason the suits were in the town in the first place. Now they are gone, their suits left behind and anonymity fully restored, and the party has been paid with a strange bauble containing a very old map of Faerûn. With it will come the first inklings of the main arc. Differences in the map vs. the present-day landscape will lead the players to certain artifacts from the lost Empire of Netheril, and meddling in forces they don't understand may draw the attention of Netheril's ancient enemies, the phaerimm.

Also worth mentioning that the guard could have been a valued asset to a local crime syndicate or guild, also family ties or perhaps lover now UPSET, or the only good factor holding someone or something from taking more bold actions.

Killing cops is just bad.

Good ideas. This town is small, mostly human, and suspicious of outsiders. The players will find it even less hospitable than before, and may finally be run out after this next minor arc (missing townsfolk and a plea for help from the mayor) is resolved.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Red Tape Dude (from Little Orange) guarding a ladder the PCs must descend in a (very tall) tower.

Red Tape Dude      CR 3
XP 800
LN medium Aberration
Init +0; Senses Darkvision 60 ft; Perception +7 

Defense
AC  15, touch 11, flat-footed 14  (+1 Dodge, +4 Natural)
HP  30 (4d8+12)
Fort +4, Ref +2, Will +6
Defensive Abilities Evasion

Offense
Spd 30 ft, climb 30 ft
Melee Bite +5 (1d6+2), 2 claws +5 (1d6+1)
Spell-Like Abilities CL 4, Concentration +6)
At will - Forbiddance (DC13), Minor Confusion (DC13)

Tactics
Before Combat Opens combat with minor confusion.
During Combat Uses forbiddance to try to get environmental hazards (falling, etc) to injure or kill characters (while lecturing them about safe practices), using his bite and claws only in extremis or if he thinks his victims may escape.
Morale Will flee or surrender (if retreat is impossible) if brought below 10 HP.

Statistics
Str 14, Dex 10, Con 14, Int 10, Wis 10, Cha 14
Base Attack +3; CMB 5; CMD 15
Feats Dodge, Toughness
Skills Acrobatics +7, Climb +17, Perception +7, Stealth +7
   Racial Bonuses +8 Climb
SQ Cling
Languages Taldane

Ecology
Environment Sophie's mansion
Organization Unique
Treasure Standard

Special Abilities
Cling (Ex): Red Tape Dude can climb upside down as easily as vertically.  He only has to have 3 limbs free to climb, and 2 limbs free to maintain a position on a wall or ceiling.  He does not become flat-footed while climbing.

Red tape dude looks like a human wrapped in red cloth tape, with limbs distorted like a lizard.  He is obsessed with eliminating unsafe practices, even if this means killing the people he is trying to "protect".  While not actually evil, he just doesn't value lives over regulations.  In this case, he is bothered by ladder safety, and will cause the rungs to retract above and below the first person climbing down from room 28 to 27 in the mansion.   He keeps to the walls and ceilings to avoid attacks by unruly creatures, and forbids them from doing anything unsafe (especially to him). 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Custom items for the group (they aren't getting them just yet):

Clamor:  +1 Greatsword, eager (draw as a swift action), loud (+1 to intimidate checks, +1 to wandering monster checks or for monsters to overhear combat using perception), light on command (as a torch), blade inscribed with the word "Clamor".

Needle: +1 rapier, killer (+1 to confirm crits), flamboyant (+1 panache).

Justice: +1 longsword, blessed (counts as a good source of damage), studious (+1 knowledge (religion))

Wrecker: +1 light crossbow, wrecker (ignores 2 points of hardness), murder (re-roll ones on sneak attack dice).

Robes of the Apprentice: +2 armor (as per bracers), focused (+2 on concentration checks).

[Cain]

I detect someone at PD's hand in this:

https://www.reddit.com/r/DnDGreentext/comments/63fct2/of_hands_hookers/

[Junkenstein]

That's pretty good. However, my all time favourite is the tale of the industrious rogue.

https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Tale_of_an_Industrious_Rogue,_Part_I

The way it escalates is glorious. Truly inspiring.

[Cain]

When it comes to 1d4chan, I think it's hard to beat Old Man Henderson, but I will give it a read while doing my paperwork.

[Junkenstein]

Henderson is good, but the industrious rogue beats it for me based around just how much the entire thing escalates from a throwaway salt portal into, well, countless horrors.

I'd also reccomend the guy who breaks psionics as well worth a read too:
https://1d4chan.org/wiki/That_Guy_Destroys_Psionics

[Cain]

LaVulpe has said that guy is basically his spirit animal.