What the fuck do I do with this?

[LMNO]

So, over Xmas we were given a three-liter bottle of crappy port.  I'm pretty sure I don't want to actually drink it, but I suppose I could cook with it.

Any suggestions?

[Richter]

Marinade beef / add to a beef stew?
Use it in a Marsala - like sauce?
Slow - cook a pork roast in it, pot roast style?

[Richter]

..and damnit, is it a ruby or a tawny port?

[LMNO]

Ruby, I believe.

[Richter]

Cool, I've never had tawny, so I can't really speak for it.  I get the fealing it should be more white wine / marsala - esque, and might play well with chicken, so a chicken marsala dish might work.  I think ruby port would overpower the chicken.

There's always making glugg or high-test sangria I suppose.

[Suu]

Open the bottle and let it air out for a half hour. See if that helps.

[East Coast Hustle]

If you're not man enough to drink a bottle of crappy port, you can always feed your effete highbrow mouth with some port-glazed duck breast. Just reduce the port with some peppercorns, a bay leaf, and some mirepoix over low heat for a couple hours, strain, reduce further until it coats a spoon, slather on cooked crispy duck breast (or whole duck, if you want), and stick it under a salamander for a minute or three until the glaze begins to bubble and get a lacquered look.

add some beef stock or demiglace during reduction and you have a wonderful sauce to serve over game meat like elk or moose.

[Whatever]

If you're not man enough to drink a bottle of crappy port, you can always feed your effete highbrow mouth with some port-glazed duck breast. Just reduce the port with some peppercorns, a bay leaf, and some mirepoix over low heat for a couple hours, strain, reduce further until it coats a spoon, slather on cooked crispy duck breast (or whole duck, if you want), and stick it under a salamander for a minute or three until the glaze begins to bubble and get a lacquered look.

add some beef stock or demiglace during reduction and you have a wonderful sauce to serve over game meat like elk or moose.

God that sounds so good.

[Triple Zero]

Somewhere deep down in this subforum is my thread "pate, the making of", with a pictorial account on how I made pate. It was delicious, and required port.. not 3 litres though.

If the search wasn't down I'd have linked it.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I don't know what the hell I'd do with 3 liters of shitty port. Mix it with apple cider and make hot spiced cider, maybe?

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

Anything mentioned in this thread is good
also- baked apples

[East Coast Hustle]

Seriously, though, man up and drink it. I've downed many a bottle of both Fairbanks and Taylor in my time and look at me now - I'm a stunning example of the pinnacle that humanity can aspire to.

[LMNO]

Well, yeah.  But.  I'm afraid that I don't really want to drink "just" to get drunk anymore.  I kind of want a pleasant experience.  Or at least an experience that isn't close to choking down fortified flat Welchs' grape soda.

[Jasper]

The glaze idea makes me wish I got 3 litres of crap port for xmas.

[East Coast Hustle]

Well, yeah.  But.  I'm afraid that I don't really want to drink "just" to get drunk anymore.  I kind of want a pleasant experience.  Or at least an experience that isn't close to choking down fortified flat Welchs' grape soda.

if getting drunk in and of itself is no longer a pleasant experience, why drink at all? I mean, let's not delude ourselves, the reality is that pretty much all booze tastes like crap and we wouldn't drink ANY of it "for the taste" if it contained no alcohol.