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TESTEMONAIL:  Right and Discordianism allows room for personal interpretation. You have your theories and I have mine. Unlike Christianity, Discordia allows room for ideas and opinions, and mine is well-informed and based on ancient philosophy and theology, so, my neo-Discordian friends, open your minds to my interpretation and I will open my mind to yours. That's fair enough, right? Just claiming to be discordian should mean that your mind is open and willing to learn and share ideas. You guys are fucking bashing me and your laughing at my theologies and my friends know what's up and are laughing at you and honestly this is my last shot at putting a label on my belief structure and your making me lose all hope of ever finding a ideological group I can relate to because you don't even know what the fuck I'm talking about and everything I have said is based on the founding principals of real Discordianism. Expand your mind.

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ENOUGH FUCKING WHINING!

Started by Enrico Salazar, February 03, 2011, 08:00:26 PM

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Enrico Salazar

February 03, 2011, 08:00:26 PM
The next maggot that Enrico sees whining in this board is going to be paper cutted deeply between thumb and forfinger, then Enrico will fuck the cut.  It will not be as sexytime as it sound.




Ok, speak of sexytime, Enrico is curious... who is willing to speak of first time they had performed the jiggle-tango?


If you are all good faggots and entertain the Generalissimo, he might even grace you with the story of his first time.  Might.


DO IT!  TELL ENRICO A STORY!


your friend,

in good times and bad,

the Center Square on Hollywood Squares from February 1980-April 1980,

still waterproof after all these years,

Enrico Ritzibottom Salazar
Did someone say gorgeous?

Suu

#1
February 03, 2011, 08:06:45 PM
Dear Uncle Enrico,

It appears that I am moving into a neighborhood of Salazorians. At first I thought they were ordinary Italians, and then I smelled the Codfish oil cologne emanating from next door, it's the same brand that you sent my ex-husband as a wedding gift.

What is a proper Salazorian greeting for these folks? And what do I do to get them off of my property?

Snuggles,

Suu
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Jenne

#2
February 03, 2011, 08:28:05 PM
Dear Enrico,

I have missed your snuggly yet vicious humor and scathing yet tantalizing tongue round these parts.

I don't have any great stories, but I do wonder if you can tell me how you would dispose of the creep that is married to my best friend who's also my cousin.  You see, this fool thought she slept around on him so he had her take a motherfucking lie detector test.  Twice.  Granted, he has epilepsy and brain damage from driving into a brick wall at 60 mph when he was 19 (while drug running and being chased by cops).  However, he's a total fucknut and messes with my chi.

How to dispose of him such that 1) no one ever guesses where he is and 2) at least make him FEEL like he's disposed of if I lack the talents to do it properly.

Yours in gloriousnesshood,

Jenne

The Good Reverend Roger

#3
February 03, 2011, 10:26:54 PM
Enrico, as always, has the right of it.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.
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