JUST IN CASE

[Cuddlefish]

I'm not as invincible as I used to be.

Between Thanksgiving and New-Years I got REALLY sick. I cracked a rib from coughing so hard (which I think I just accidentally re-broke, and I have a show to play tomorrow). The last time I had gotten significantly sick was about 15 years ago.

Now my immune system is telling me to fuck myself, and is getting revenge for all the terrible things I've done to it since. And it's taking a bit longer to recover from the bumps and bruises that come with the "business" I put myself through. My insides, well, I can only imagine what they're beginning to look like (I wouldn't know, I haven't been to a doctor in goddess knows how long).

Long story short, while I don't think I'm going anywhere any time soon (unfortunately for you spags), there's really no way for me to know for sure, and She knows I'm not going to change my habits any time soon (that would be "giving up" and quitters never win). That said, just in case, I want to archive my "last wishes" here, just in case...

1) Do whatever needs to be done to my remains, except for the following: No pooing or pissing on Dimo-corpse, plz. If you just need to write or draw stuff on my lifeless body, like penorz or things that raise questions about my sexuality, that's fine, but be reasonable. Maybe make me into a poster-gasm. But: DO NOT CREMATE. Thnx.

2) Body goes to space. I repeat: BODY GOES TO SPACE! I don't care how you fuckers get it done, but GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! Body. In tact. In space. Plz.

3) Take all my belongings and sell them (I have quite the Transformers collection) and start a charity in my name that benefits legit scientific research and studies focused on improving the educational system. You guys can choose who runs it, but this charity MUST BE OPENLY DISCORDIAN! Sorry to all you closet cases, but that's the way I want it.

Suu, Richter, I'm making it your responsibility to make sure, in case I don't live for ever, to ensure that my family understands that this is what I want for Dimo-corpse, and not just me being "silly" or "unreasonable."
If they don't like it, tell them to fuck themselves and steal Dimo-corpse.

On the off chance that I can be Frankensteined or something, I suppose that would be okay, but when the Dimo-stein monster croaks, all of the above should apply to Dimo-stein-corpse.

And in case you're wondering, this is no joke. This is teh srs bzns.

[Suu]

You're putting this in OUR hands?


You better hope the Pawtuxet floods again. (which is probably why you got so damn sick in the first place.)