Oh god help me, I figured out how to make Crif Dogs at home

[navkat]

Crif Dog is somewhat of a phenomenon in the NY Metro area (where I'm from). Crif (and the attached "secret" speakeasy, P.D.T.) have gained quite a notoriety among late-night St. Marks drinkers and partiers...with damned good reason: These are not ordinary "Danger Dogs" with a cute, little spiral of bacon running the length.--these are fully-encased, fried-to-an-ever-loving-crisp, drunk-dialing, edible dildoes of infinite, ungodly hedonistic pleasure.

But there's a trick to 'em. You can't just wrap one of those fuckers in bacon and drop it in some oil. There's a method.

You will need:
1 pkg 8 standard beef& pork hot dogs (the cheap ones work best here)
8 strips of bacon
1 pkg hot dog rolls
Your favorite Crif dog toppings according to the menu (or make up your own!)
Deep fryer and oil (I used canola)

Heat your deep fryer to the lowest setting..like around 345ºF

Heat the dogs slightly so they're warm. A microwave works just fine for this, just make sure they don't get too hot and/or split.

Dry the warmed dogs off with a clean paper towel and wrap each tightly with a whole strip of bacon, making sure the entire dog is completely covered from end to end.

Place the dogs into a non-stick frying pan over a med-low heat with the loose end of the bacon down so that it's pinned in place between the dog and the pan. Let the bacon get a little golden and then caaaaarefullly turn each dog little bits at a time. It's very important that you keep the temp down and don't let the bacon crisp. What you want to do here is cauterize the bacon to itself and to the hot dog so that it keeps its shape for the fryer without needing to be stuck with toothpicks. If you skip this step and attempt to put the wrapped dogs directly into the oil, the bacon flies off and the hot dog goes explodey. If you attempt to cook the dog in its entirety in the pan, they don't come out evenly cooked and don't taste as good.

When the bacon looks cauterized on at least two opposing sides, drop them carefully, one by one into the hot oil using metal tongs. If you did it right, the dogs should stay fully wrapped. I suggest only doing a couple at a time until you get the hang.

This next part goes quick. After about a minute, the dogs will float to the top. keep popping them back down into the oil with the tongs, turning and turning until the bacon looks really fucking crispy.

Pull them out, drain the excess oil, then bun 'em, top 'em and eat.

I personally love the Chihuahua (avocado, sour cream and green onion) and the Tsunami (Teryaki, pineapple and green onion).

[Icey]

I'm pretty sure eating one of these is qualification for damnation in most religions.

[Luna]

I'm pretty sure eating one of these is qualification for damnation in most religions.

Might be worth it.

[navkat]

I'm pretty sure eating one of these is qualification for damnation in most religions.

Might be worth it.

You could omit the bun.

[Icey]

Wow. When I made that first post, I wasn't hungry. But now, your temptation doesn't seem so far-fetched. Who am I kidding? I fucking want one. Now.

[Luna]

I'm pretty sure eating one of these is qualification for damnation in most religions.

Might be worth it.

You could omit the bun.

Pft, nah.  I'll even have it on Friday, that should wrap up most of the major religions, right?

If I'm going to hell, I'm going in style, with the passport stamped by as many different faiths as possible.

[Jenne]

Huh.  My 13 year old who's NOT a fan of hot dogs or anything sausagey at all might like this.  Bacon makes everything better.

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

Now we do bacon on hotdogs, usually crumbled but have wrapped them in slices and cooked them on the grill. That has always gone over well.  Deep fried however, damn...  that kind of scares me.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

We have a food cart guy here who does them.
His name is Bruno.


Bruno     the bacon wrapped hot dog guy.

[navkat]

I'm pretty sure eating one of these is qualification for damnation in most religions.

Might be worth it.

You could omit the bun.

Pft, nah.  I'll even have it on Friday, that should wrap up most of the major religions, right?

If I'm going to hell, I'm going in style, with the passport stamped by as many different faiths as possible.

Hot.

[Don Coyote]

I'm pretty sure eating one of these is qualification for damnation in most religions.

Might be worth it.

You could omit the bun.

Pft, nah.  I'll even have it on Friday, that should wrap up most of the major religions, right?

If I'm going to hell, I'm going in style, with the passport stamped by as many different faiths as possible.

Have to add dairy.

[Luna]

I'm pretty sure eating one of these is qualification for damnation in most religions.

Might be worth it.

You could omit the bun.

Pft, nah.  I'll even have it on Friday, that should wrap up most of the major religions, right?

If I'm going to hell, I'm going in style, with the passport stamped by as many different faiths as possible.

Have to add dairy.

Cheese.   

[Icey]

I'm pretty sure eating one of these is qualification for damnation in most religions.

Might be worth it.

You could omit the bun.

Pft, nah.  I'll even have it on Friday, that should wrap up most of the major religions, right?

If I'm going to hell, I'm going in style, with the passport stamped by as many different faiths as possible.

I'm going to quote that, if you don't mind. Too much awesome in those words to let it sediment in this thread.

[Luna]

I'm pretty sure eating one of these is qualification for damnation in most religions.

Might be worth it.

You could omit the bun.

Pft, nah.  I'll even have it on Friday, that should wrap up most of the major religions, right?

If I'm going to hell, I'm going in style, with the passport stamped by as many different faiths as possible.

I'm going to quote that, if you don't mind. Too much awesome in those words to let it sediment in this thread.

I'd be flattered.

[Requia ☣]

Eating on a Friday won't get you into hell anymore with the Catholics.  Though some still do the no meat on Friday thing during lent.

Now the question is, do Ramadan and lent ever overlap?