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I have reached a terrible turning point in life.

Started by tyrannosaurus vex, March 07, 2011, 11:36:49 PM

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tyrannosaurus vex

March 07, 2011, 11:36:49 PM
The doctor says my blood pressure is too high (220/185) and my cholesterol is "elevated." He says "EAT BORING SHIT LIKE CARROTS AND BROCCOLI."

This is a problem for me, because healthy food has two strikes against it: 1. it tastes like shit, and 2. it's a pain in the ass to prepare.

so, here's where PD comes in. now you guise with your ultimate knowledge need to tell me how to eat healthy without giving up taste or (too much) convenience.

also, for the next couple of months i will be living as a bachelor in a strange new city where the only thing more plentiful than fast food is really cheap fast food.

ideally, you will have some ideas for food that includes naked girls.
Evil and Unfeeling Arse-Flenser From The City of the Damned.

The Good Reverend Roger

#2
March 07, 2011, 11:41:06 PM
Quote from: postvex™ on March 07, 2011, 11:36:49 PM
The doctor says my blood pressure is too high (220/185) and my cholesterol is "elevated." He says "EAT BORING SHIT LIKE CARROTS AND BROCCOLI."

This is a problem for me, because healthy food has two strikes against it: 1. it tastes like shit, and 2. it's a pain in the ass to prepare.

so, here's where PD comes in. now you guise with your ultimate knowledge need to tell me how to eat healthy without giving up taste or (too much) convenience.

also, for the next couple of months i will be living as a bachelor in a strange new city where the only thing more plentiful than fast food is really cheap fast food.

ideally, you will have some ideas for food that includes naked girls.

Welcome to my fucking world.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

tyrannosaurus vex

#3
March 07, 2011, 11:44:33 PM
cactus is food, right?
Evil and Unfeeling Arse-Flenser From The City of the Damned.

The Good Reverend Roger

#4
March 07, 2011, 11:49:27 PM
Quote from: postvex™ on March 07, 2011, 11:44:33 PM
cactus is food, right?

Well, yeah, but no red meat, fucking veggies all Goddamn day, etc.

At least there's pills.  That's gotta be worth something.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

tyrannosaurus vex

#5
March 07, 2011, 11:50:20 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2011, 11:49:27 PM
Quote from: postvex™ on March 07, 2011, 11:44:33 PM
cactus is food, right?

Well, yeah, but no red meat, fucking veggies all Goddamn day, etc.

At least there's pills.  That's gotta be worth something.

the pills they gave me don't do anything but get stuck in my throat.
Evil and Unfeeling Arse-Flenser From The City of the Damned.

Prince Glittersnatch III

#6
March 07, 2011, 11:53:05 PM
Peanut Butter and Ramen(the breakfast of champions) man.
Buy them in bulk and just live off of it for awhile.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?=743264506 <---worst human being to ever live.

http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/False%20Religions/Other%20Pagan%20Mumbo-Jumbo/discordianism.htm <----Learn the truth behind Discordianism

Quote from: Aleister Growly on September 04, 2010, 04:08:37 AM
Glittersnatch would be a rather unfortunate condition, if a halfway decent troll name.

Quote from: GIGGLES on June 16, 2011, 10:24:05 PM
AORTAL SEX MADES MY DICK HARD AS FUCK!

The Good Reverend Roger

#7
March 07, 2011, 11:53:40 PM
Quote from: postvex™ on March 07, 2011, 11:50:20 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2011, 11:49:27 PM
Quote from: postvex™ on March 07, 2011, 11:44:33 PM
cactus is food, right?

Well, yeah, but no red meat, fucking veggies all Goddamn day, etc.

At least there's pills.  That's gotta be worth something.

the pills they gave me don't do anything but get stuck in my throat.

Smack your Doctor around a bit.  He'll give you what you need.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞

#8
March 07, 2011, 11:56:30 PM
Throw fresh veggies/fruits in your blender and liquefy it until the pulpy mass is desirable to pour down your gullet.

Then you can make a large batch for the week and only have to really clean up once. You'll also need a wide mouth container without one of those sport nozzles for easy cleaning.

Put stickers of naked girls on your wide mouth container.
P E R   A S P E R A   A D   A S T R A

Telarus

#9
March 08, 2011, 12:19:15 AM
Quote from: ☄ · · · N E T · · · ☄ on March 07, 2011, 11:56:30 PM
Put stickers of naked girls on your wide mouth container.

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Jasper

#10
March 08, 2011, 12:42:25 AM
You might try making caprese salads with nonfat mozzarella.

Kai

#11
March 08, 2011, 12:46:34 AM
I disagree with the OP. I regularly get vegetable CRAVINGS like you wouldn't believe. I'll be at work and suddenly a green pepper will sound like the most tasty thing in the world. And I don't mean, a cut up and then stir fried green pepper.

I mean a whole fucking green pepper that I can take a big fucking bite out of, like an apple.

At the same time my interest in meat has gone way down.
If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. --Loren Eisley, The Immense Journey

Her Royal Majesty's Chief of Insect Genitalia Dissection
Grand Visser of the Six Legged Class
Chanticleer of the Holometabola Clade Church, Diptera Parish

Placid Dingo

#12
March 08, 2011, 12:51:26 AM
I know theres some ethically questionable establishments that serve sushi on naked girls.
Haven't paid rent since 2014 with ONE WEIRD TRICK.

The Good Reverend Roger

#13
March 08, 2011, 12:51:56 AM
Quote from: Placid Dingo on March 08, 2011, 12:51:26 AM
I know theres some ethically questionable establishments that serve sushi on naked girls.

How the fuck is that questionable?
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Jasper

#14
March 08, 2011, 12:54:24 AM
Probably much in the same way PDcom is.
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