More Futurisitic Fun Than You Really Wanted, part I of V

[Eater of Clowns]

Huh?  There was a question about usage and attribution earlier in the thread.  I was answering it because I hadn't yet.

What does this have to do with ego and AKK?   

[Adios]

was joke

[Luna]

Huh?  There was a question about usage and attribution earlier in the thread.  I was answering it because I hadn't yet.

What does this have to do with ego and AKK?   

Nothing at all.  There was just some minor confusion.  Carry on, more good writing, plz!  (Hee, I don't have to wait for the books to come out!)

[Cainad (dec.)]

Huh?  There was a question about usage and attribution earlier in the thread.  I was answering it because I hadn't yet.

What does this have to do with ego and AKK?   

Case of mistaken identity asshattery.

[Eater of Clowns]

You fuckers.   

I have enough asshattery that I can be held accountable for without being given someone else's.

[Luna]

You fuckers.   

I have enough asshattery that I can be held accountable for without being given someone else's.

You were mostly an innocent bystander in this one.

[Adios]

You fuckers.   

I have enough asshattery that I can be held accountable for without being given someone else's.

shaddup-n-take one for the team! 

[Eater of Clowns]

**Recording.  Tunnel 9 Gymnasum.  6/25/13  0915**

"You know, I don't suppose getting out of here would be any kind of problem."

"Precisely what I was thinking."

"Just a matter of taking a short stroll down a tunnel and popping up above."

"Precisely not what I was thinking."

"Tunnel 13 is probably a decent choice, anyway.  Plenty of sights to see along the way."

"You really think I'm a nutter?"

"Sing songy voices of the Nessies to help you ambling along.  Adventure to be had, and the stunning smell of stirred up shite."

"Where are you going with this, Hayes?"

"Have you really given any thought to this whole getting out business?"

"Course I have.  It sounds like you have as well."

"Been thinking is all."

"So then you're interested?"

"Oh certainly."

"Suddenly have a new desire to breathe the comparatively fresh air of above ground England again?"

"No."

"Not sure I'm following."

"I'm staying."

"You just said -"

"The kid, Palmer.  The kid.  Sams.  I want him out of here."

"He wants out?"

"Well that's the tricky bit.  I have to keep working on him.  He's taking something out of our talks."

"Fuck's sake, you've gone soft."

"Only when I'm not thinking about your mum."

"Not sure if you've noticed but time isn't exactly on my side.  This thing gets bigger by the day.  If we don't act now, we might lose our chance."

"The kid needs to go.  It's not fair, him all wrapped up in this.  You and I aren't exactly old fuckers, well, I'm not, but he's right out of University.  He deserves to get his heart torn out by a woman or two before it gets torn out by a Nessie."

"He's an Operator, it's not like he's in immediate danger."

"Yeah, not until the Nessies figure out a way into our hive.  Is it easy convincing yourself we're safe down here when you can hear them horrors echoing about as you're trying to sleep?"

"Still remains that we can't wait to let you preach the light to him until he decides you aren't a nutter.  Well, not about this at least."

"Maybe he doesn't need to think I'm right.  Maybe the suggestion, or order, needs to come from the right direction."

"I can see it.  Dear Sams, get the fuck out our sewers, Love Payne.  And if that'll work on anyone, it'll work on Sams."

"I don't like it, but I'm more comfortable with that than the alternative."

"Whatever you do, get it done within a week.  A week regular time, not your own fucking Hayesian time, by the way.  We're moving on it with or without you."

"And the Paynites don't know about it."

"What do you take me for?  I've been deleting these recordings."

"How the bloody hell you been do that?"

"You take certain actions that compromise ethics that you'd previously held."

**End Recording**

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

"Damn me James, I thought I told you to replace the chicken's water?"

"Ma, I told you, the bucket is stuck down the well and I can't bring it up."

"Have you tried just pulling the rope and not using the winch at all?"

"Yes ma'am, its stuck or something because it will pull up so far then nothing."

"Go get your Da from the milking parlor and have him help you with it.  Most likely the rope is stuck on that one stone that sticks out.  If he's too busy, fill their pans from the pump on the backside of the house"

"Yes ma'am."

"Go on now, I'm busy.  You see to it those chickens have water no matter how it gets done."

"Yes ma'am."

She swatted him on the bottom as he scooted out the door into the sunshine. 

The sun was shining she remembered.  It was a glorious day, the kind you thank whatever powers that be there are that you are alive and well with a roof over your head and food in the larder.

She'd been kneading dough for that week's bread and didn't want him all dusty and smelling like a busy little boy in her kitchen.  Time enough when he and his Da came in for lunch in a couple of hours.  Her last loaves would be on the back of the Aga rising with a fresh loaf on the table to cut thick slices from still warm.

She was humming under her breath and really working the dough when she first heard the screams.  At first she thought it was her son playing with the dog or chasing the chickens screaming with laughter.  With a half a smile on her face she walked to the door to tell him to stop pestering her hens or they would stop laying when she saw it. 

Whatever it was, her first thought was that her Grandda's stories when she was a girl had never done these hideous creatures justice.  If this was a Loch Ness monster, then it had certainly evolved.  She kept walking towards the creature, absently wiping a piece of her husband's brain off her face.  She turned her face to the sky as it started to rain.  Holding out her hand she realized the rain was red.  It fascinated her to see the red drops fall into her hand like ruby water.  Looking up she saw her son's legs still kicking as the creature swallowed him down its throat.  A rage she had never felt before filled her and she grabbed the garden hoe by the shed as she ran head on towards the creature brandishing her hoe like a knight with a lance.

She swung once, twice then on the third swing she felt the hoe hit and catch, the blade sharpened for cutting weeds cutting into the creature's skin like a hot knife thru butter.  She yanked it free and hit the creature again and again, dodging its claws and leaping out of the way as it spit some venomous green goo which started to smoke when it hit the ground.  As she turned to take yet another swing she tripped over her husband's legs, looking down she realized the rest of him had been ripped off.  She pushed herself up, preparing to swing again when she realized the creature was sliding into her well, down the rope.  She quickly ran over and hacked at the rope with the hoe.  Just as she made her final cut she felt a burning sensation on the side of her face and she screamed in agony.....  Those screams being the last thing she remembered when she woke up in hospital 6 weeks later.

She opened her eyes slowly, immediately aware she was not in her own bed in her own home.  Her nose twitching from the scent of antiseptic and disease combined.  She looked to her left and realized she could not see out of that eye.  Raising a bandaged hand she touched her face feeling the pebbling and roughness of new scar tissue.  When she tried to open her eye she couldn't, when she touched her eyelid she felt the stitches.  She lay there and took stock, legs, still there, arms, still there, hands, still there but both are heavily bandaged. 

She glances over and sees a small mirror on the side table.  Stretching to reach it she catches a glimpse of her scarred and disfigured face and she starts to scream.....

The nurse quickly comes over with a needle in her hand.  The screams become moans which become a light snore within seconds.

"That was a close one nurse, fast acting with that sedative."

"Yes Doctor, thank you."

"I think just a couple more days and we will be able to let her come awake fully."

"You think Doctor?"

"Yes, we have to let her regain consciousness so she can tell us who attacked her family on their farm."

"Who Doctor?"

Looking sharply over the Doctor snaps "Of course who nurse.  Please do not tell me you are buying into this "creature" nonsense." He asks punctuating creature with finger apostrophes.

"I'll be honest Doctor, I just don't know.  The stories from there are terrible and this kind of thing has been happening almost daily.  Why the morgue is full and the ward is fuller with what is left of the survivors.  How can you not believe?"

"Now nurse, please don't make me replace you, we work so well together."

"Of course not Doctor, it's all utter nonsense."

"That's more like it nurse."

The nurse shook her head as the Doctor walked away.  He was American and just hadn't grown up with the monsters that went bump in the night.  The old stories hadn't made it when the people left in droves for a new land, a monster free land.  They weren't raised with warnings to stay away from the lakes and ponds, to avoid the dark places in the wood or the caves by the sea.  They made up their own monsters, then they elected them to run the country. 

Tsking the ignorance she went on her rounds knowing that when they woke the poor woman in a few days even if she physically survived, her mind was gone.  Because you couldn't look into the eyes of the monster and walk away sane.

She walked down the line to the next horribly disfigured patient, the healing burns on their body looking like they had been purged in the very fires of hell.

She looked up and saw the men in strange uniforms coming towards her.  They were battle worn and shuffling on their feet, their strange almost armor casting odd shadows on the floor.  None would or maybe they couldn't look her in the eye.

"Can I help you gentlemen?"

"Sergeant Hickland ma'am.  Ma'am we have been ordered to transfer this ward to the army hospital on board the HMS Victoria."

"That is impossible sergeant, these patients cannot be moved. Wait, stop your men sergeant, these people cannot....." she sank slowly to the floor never having felt the needle slide under her skin.

"Ok boys, get these people loaded up and taken out of here.  I'll find the Doctor and take care of him then we are out of here.  Private Wimmer, you are sure all the farms in that area have been leveled and the wells blasted in correct?"

"Yes sergeant.  But sarge, the pieces of people, could we not have given them a decent burial and those monsters, sarge what the hell are those things?"

"Ours is not to question Private.  You knew that when you joined.  You do what you are told, same as I do.  I knew it was a thankless job when I joined in '40.  Of course when I joined I thought I'd be fighting the Nazis, not these stinking monsters."  He walked down the ward checking to make sure any personal possessions had been collected and all charts were emptied....  It was a thankless job, he'd sure rather have been shooting some Nazis.

"Grandda, where did you hear such a scary story?" asked the beautiful little girl sitting at the old man's feet?

"Well sweetheart, let me ask you. What is your last name?"

"Wimmer, same as yours." she proclaims with a missing front tooth grin only a child can give.

"Well there you have your answer sweetheart, I lived it."

[The Good Reverend Roger]

WOOT!

[Adios]

WOOT!

Seconded!

[Adios]

Thanks to Khara for an entire new thought direction.


Water Borehole Prognosis Report for drinking and irrigation.

To; Scottish Environment Protection Agency (SEPA)

CC; Geological Society, Well Drillers Association, CDC

CONFIDENTIAL

Environment agents recently ran water quality tests on a newly drilled water well. The well has been capped and quarantined pending the results of said test.

It has been discovered that an unusually high and potentially (likely, in fact) deadly amount of an unknown highly acidic chemical exists in the ground water supply. Chemists have been working around the clock to identify the chemical, without success.

We are continuing to test other wells in the area and this finding is consistent across the board. Many isolated farms have suffered 100% human casualties from drinking the water. This has been confirmed by post mortem examinations.

We are currently looking into the possibility of newly surfacing pollutants caused by UNDEX from as far back as 1946. A connection is unlikely as the bulk of those explosives were WWII type and had none of the chemicals we have isolated.

All new borehole permits are being denied and any approved in the meanwhile have been revoked.

Physical symptoms include blistering of the skin, infection, loss of motor skills and mental capacity. This has so far been 100% fatal to livestock drinking from any underground water source.

The contamination is increasing, not only in potency but in area as well. Wells that tested clean in the previous week are now contaminated.

Evacuations are being conducted quietly so as to prevent widespread panic and the cities being overran. Currently 2,000 rural residents are being held in a way to prevent any outside communication. Water is being imported from municipal water supplies. The municipal water is showing only trace amounts of the substance at this time.

Please contact this office if there are any questions or


"WHAT THE HELL? What happened to the power, everything just crashed!"

"Sir, we have just been informed there is to be no witnesses, confirm, no witnesses."

"Roger, make sure to grab that fucking hard drive and wipe the rest of them."

"Yes, Sir."

[P3nT4gR4m]

This page has just made me jizz intestinal fluid all over my monitor and keyboard. Was beginning to think teh thread was going to die now and, hell, if it had that'd been plenty but no - there's moar 

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

Fucking RAH Charley. Glad I added something to work with!!!

[Adios]

Fucking RAH Charley. Glad I added something to work with!!!

Damned brilliant idea you had there.