HELP ME SUUUUU

[Jenne]

You sound far too smug and in control, Suu.

Danger, Will Robinson.   Danger.

*fears FOR you*

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I gotta say, this is the Golden Age of writing on PD.

My electricians all think I'm a lunatic, because I just laughed myself purple.  PURPLE.

[Suu]

If it wasn't for the fact that I have a 5 pager due tomorrow night and a 12 pager due next week, I'd be participating more.

[Eater of Clowns]

"I.  I.  I'm not okay with this.  I'm not okay with it.  I'm just a clerk, man.  That guy, he f*bleep*.  Getting my GED, I'll do whatever it takes, can't won't do this."
-Former 7/11 store clerk, when asked about the incident.

"You know what the worst part was?  It was the smell.  I showed up there and I just figured it was the hot dogs, but then it just stayed there the whole ride.  It really got to me.  It's not the burned flesh thing, I mean, I've dealt with burn victims before it's just.  Well.  He smelled delicious."
-Paramedic responding to the call.

"Between you and me?  Like, turn the camera off?  Not recording?  Alright, I was totally going to *bleep* him.  Never *bleep* a corpse before and I figured it was going to be my chance.  But then I was all getting into it and, well, do you remember that scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade?  The bad guy drinks from the wrong cup and he gets all old and *bleep*?  I felt that happening to my *bleep*.  No *bleep*.  Felt it.  Got the *bleep* out of there."
-Local pervert.

"Never seen anything like this before.  What do you want, some kind of comment?  Well that's my comment.  Never seen anything like this before, not in 13 years.  No, no we won't be investigating this matter.  Actually, I wish we didn't have to file this report.  Legally required to hold onto it for two years, you know.  So two years from now, when I'm finally over the whole thing, I'm going to be shredding some old documents, see my name down there, and remember it all again.  Look I'm going home and think of a thing to tell my wife and kid when they ask me what work was like today."
-Officer responding to the scene.

"Have you tried these hot dogs?  They're incredible.  I buy them by the half dozen now, here, take one."
-Bystander.

[Luna]

"I.  I.  I'm not okay with this.  I'm not okay with it.  I'm just a clerk, man.  That guy, he f*bleep*.  Getting my GED, I'll do whatever it takes, can't won't do this."
-Former 7/11 store clerk, when asked about the incident.

"You know what the worst part was?  It was the smell.  I showed up there and I just figured it was the hot dogs, but then it just stayed there the whole ride.  It really got to me.  It's not the burned flesh thing, I mean, I've dealt with burn victims before it's just.  Well.  He smelled delicious."
-Paramedic responding to the call.

"Between you and me?  Like, turn the camera off?  Not recording?  Alright, I was totally going to *bleep* him.  Never *bleep* a corpse before and I figured it was going to be my chance.  But then I was all getting into it and, well, do you remember that scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade?  The bad guy drinks from the wrong cup and he gets all old and *bleep*?  I felt that happening to my *bleep*.  No *bleep*.  Felt it.  Got the *bleep* out of there."
-Local pervert.

"Never seen anything like this before.  What do you want, some kind of comment?  Well that's my comment.  Never seen anything like this before, not in 13 years.  No, no we won't be investigating this matter.  Actually, I wish we didn't have to file this report.  Legally required to hold onto it for two years, you know.  So two years from now, when I'm finally over the whole thing, I'm going to be shredding some old documents, see my name down there, and remember it all again.  Look I'm going home and think of a thing to tell my wife and kid when they ask me what work was like today."
-Officer responding to the scene.

"Have you tried these hot dogs?  They're incredible.  I buy them by the half dozen now, here, take one."
-Bystander.

   

[Jenne]

O gawd o gawd.   

...Suu...tried to warn ya, Babe.  Also, witness the man's handle: EATER of CLOWNS.  Clowns.

He eats them.

Just saying...

...and EoC, that last quote, by "Bystander"?  Awesomesauce in a pure way.  Lovely touch at the end there!

[Luna]

I'mma wake up screaming tonight because of the "local pervert" bit.

[Richter]

 

[Suu]

O gawd o gawd.   

...Suu...tried to warn ya, Babe.  Also, witness the man's handle: EATER of CLOWNS.  Clowns.

He eats them.

Just saying...

...and EoC, that last quote, by "Bystander"?  Awesomesauce in a pure way.  Lovely touch at the end there!

Naaaaah, I've had beers with the guy in person. He's a kitten. I swear.

[Jenne]

A kitten...

WHO EATS CLOWNS

[Eater of Clowns]

For reference purposes:

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=29011.0