Joseph- A very questionable Wizard

[The Wizard Joseph]

Was just chatting with my scribe while you all were posting.  Proper responses in a bit.

Most of my people don't actually know much about Discordia, but are definitely gonna learn as they go.

This post is inspiring something in me.  In my guts.  Way, way down, near the colon.

It is a terrible inspiration.  It is the sort of thing that bards sing about centuries later, and winds up getting conflated with 3-4 major religions. 

Hm...  You mean like the Idea that circumcision is a good and necessary thing?  more than a few religions picked that one up along the way and there's still contention about it.

If you've got an Idea that's gonna take off like that man please do share!

[Doktor Howl]

Hm...  You mean like the Idea that circumcision is a good and necessary thing?  more than a few religions picked that one up along the way and there's still contention about it.

If you've got an Idea that's gonna take off like that man please do share!

Do you think before you post, or are you just one of those stream of consciousness retards?

[The Wizard Joseph]

Hm...  You mean like the Idea that circumcision is a good and necessary thing?  more than a few religions picked that one up along the way and there's still contention about it.

If you've got an Idea that's gonna take off like that man please do share!

Do you think before you post, or are you just one of those stream of consciousness retards?

I did think before I posted.  I had to look up the meaning of conflated.  It means mixed in or fused or confused.  Most of religion seems that way to me.  Ancient traditions that may have had a purpose or meaning once, now pointlessly practiced.  They borrow and mix with each other much more freely than most followers would be comfortable with if they did some real homework.

Did I step on your pet Echidna or something?  Why you gotta poke at me man?
You should know I'm sensitive about my retardation. 

[Doktor Howl]

You should know I'm sensitive about my retardation. 

This ain't gonna be your century, kid.

[The Wizard Joseph]

You should know I'm sensitive about my retardation. 

This ain't gonna be your century, kid.

Hell, the way things are going on this planet I'm not sure I'd want it.

My upbringing left me with big expectations about the end of the world.  Now that I figured out that NOBODY OF ANY SORT is likely coming back for us, I'm disappointed by how it looks like things are gonna turn out. 

I think we'll manage to trundle along for a while as a species and ultimately fuck up the only thing that keeps us alive so badly that the systems we used to do it will become the new only thing keeping us alive.  Kind of like the underground society in 12 Monkeys.

That is, assuming that there's no astrophysical doom on it's way in to wipe the board soon.  Jury's still out for me on that possibility.

[Doktor Howl]

Hell, the way things are going on this planet I'm not sure I'd want it.

You're just not serious about having a good time.

Clue for the clueless:  You can't get off the ride unless you kill yourself¹, so you may as well learn to laugh at the horrible wrecks below each hairpin turn.





¹  And then you get to work at the DMV forever.

[The Wizard Joseph]

You're just not serious about having a good time.

Clue for the clueless:  You can't get off the ride unless you kill yourself¹, so you may as well learn to laugh at the horrible wrecks below each hairpin turn.

¹  And then you get to work at the DMV forever.

You know in a way that's part of why I decided to make it a business doing pleasure.  Other than that it's a market that's VERY difficult to totally fuck up it also gives me a chance to laugh @ some of the worst in our nature, and maybe sometimes do something about it if I manage to make Real Cash^tm.

Of course the biggest part of why I'm in it is the cash and the deluxe seating for viewing said horrible wrecks that makes possible.
When my ride also inevitably tips over the rails it would be nice to feel I made an impression before I made impact.

[Doktor Howl]

You're just not serious about having a good time.

Clue for the clueless:  You can't get off the ride unless you kill yourself¹, so you may as well learn to laugh at the horrible wrecks below each hairpin turn.

¹  And then you get to work at the DMV forever.

You know in a way that's part of why I decided to make it a business doing pleasure.  Other than that it's a market that's VERY difficult to totally fuck up it also gives me a chance to laugh @ some of the worst in our nature, and maybe sometimes do something about it if I manage to make Real Cash^tm.

Of course the biggest part of why I'm in it is the cash and the deluxe seating for viewing said horrible wrecks that makes possible.
When my ride also inevitably tips over the rails it would be nice to feel I made an impression before I made impact.

THIS IS WHERE YOU ARE FUCKING UP (the bolded bit).

You will make an impression WHEN you impact, so why not concentrate on enjoying yourself?  Life is too fucking important to take seriously, and no wannabe hipster guru ever actually had any fun.  QUIT WORRYING ABOUT WHAT "IMPRESSION" OTHER PEOPLE GET FROM YOU.

Rant for the sake of ranting, not for the adoration of trustafarian chicks with poor personal hygiene.  Lose you shit for the sake of losing your shit, not for "doing something about it", as if you somehow knew what's best for other fucking primates.  Be the rage, not the perfectly orchestrated impression of rage.  Or just say "fuck it", get yourself an ironic hat and a tallbike, and join the mob of idiots infesting the streets of Seattle and Portland.

Jesus H Fucking Christ, who the fuck do you think you are?  Let the Goddamn humans make their own mistakes.

[Doktor Howl]

Oh, and before you start protesting your wannabe guru status, allow me to remind you:

Was just chatting with my scribe while you all were posting.  Proper responses in a bit.

Most of my people don't actually know much about Discordia, but are definitely gonna learn as they go.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS ASSBAGGERY?  YOU ARE AN ABOMINATION IN THE EYES OF THE SACRED WAYNE NEWTON.  THE TEMPLE MUST BE CLEANSED!

[The Wizard Joseph]

You're just not serious about having a good time.

Clue for the clueless:  You can't get off the ride unless you kill yourself¹, so you may as well learn to laugh at the horrible wrecks below each hairpin turn.

¹  And then you get to work at the DMV forever.

You know in a way that's part of why I decided to make it a business doing pleasure.  Other than that it's a market that's VERY difficult to totally fuck up it also gives me a chance to laugh @ some of the worst in our nature, and maybe sometimes do something about it if I manage to make Real Cash^tm.

Of course the biggest part of why I'm in it is the cash and the deluxe seating for viewing said horrible wrecks that makes possible.
When my ride also inevitably tips over the rails it would be nice to feel I made an impression before I made impact.

THIS IS WHERE YOU ARE FUCKING UP (the bolded bit).

You will make an impression WHEN you impact, so why not concentrate on enjoying yourself?  Life is too fucking important to take seriously, and no wannabe hipster guru ever actually had any fun.  QUIT WORRYING ABOUT WHAT "IMPRESSION" OTHER PEOPLE GET FROM YOU.¹

Rant for the sake of ranting, not for the adoration of trustafarian chicks with poor adequate² personal hygiene.  Lose you shit for the sake of losing your shit, not for "doing something about it", as if you somehow knew what's best for other fucking primates.  Be the rage, not the perfectly orchestrated impression of rage.  Or just say "fuck it", get yourself an ironic hat and a tallbike, and join the mob of idiots infesting the streets of Seattle and Portland.

Jesus H Fucking Christ, who the fuck do you think you are?  Let the Goddamn humans make their own mistakes. 

¹You might not believe how many people from diverse world views have told me this.  I think it's an artifact from being raised to believe in a God that EXPECTS something of me. I've made progress with this. You'd have found me perhaps irredeemably annoying 10 years ago.

² Fixed.  I have standards.   
When I originally started ranting it was for no reason other than that it felt good.  The truth is that the little topical rants I've posted here are a newer development for me and intentionally about trying to teach the damn dirty apes.  It's like sharing rice from my own empty bowl.  In truth there's nothing useful in me that can really help them and the ones that tell me they got something out of it mystify me.  They really believe I gave them rice.  I imagine this was how Barnum felt all the time.

About who I think I Am.  I guess I'm a person with as much compassion as rage kept in separate containers made by the lowest bidder(me). The way I run things now they're fuel when I mix 'em.  When I was much younger it was more like a binary explosive I had little control over. I will probably run out of one or both one day.

I am one of those mistake making humans Dok.  I've seen the broken get fixed, the dead brought to life(or at least start really living), the blind made to see. I remain personally unconvinced this is really doing anyone a favor and know for a fact that it's beyond my power, yet it happens. Then folks often go back into agony, despair, and ignorance...  sometimes very often willingly.

Right now I think I am mostly tired and need to crash and rise again in the morning to do the things I'm gonna do to make cash.  I do prefer having cash. That much I know for sure! 

[The Wizard Joseph]

Oh, and before you start protesting your wannabe guru status, allow me to remind you:

Was just chatting with my scribe while you all were posting.  Proper responses in a bit.

Most of my people don't actually know much about Discordia, but are definitely gonna learn as they go.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS ASSBAGGERY?  YOU ARE AN ABOMINATION IN THE EYES OF THE SACRED WAYNE NEWTON.  THE TEMPLE MUST BE CLEANSED!

NOT the first time I've defiled a temple good sir.  I wouldn't say I even care to call what I have to do with Eris worship, but I do spend quite a bit of time on my knees nonetheless!!

[Don Coyote]

Oh, and before you start protesting your wannabe guru status, allow me to remind you:

Was just chatting with my scribe while you all were posting.  Proper responses in a bit.

Most of my people don't actually know much about Discordia, but are definitely gonna learn as they go.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS ASSBAGGERY?  YOU ARE AN ABOMINATION IN THE EYES OF THE SACRED WAYNE NEWTON.  THE TEMPLE MUST BE CLEANSED!

NOT the first time I've defiled a temple good sir.  I wouldn't say I even care to call what I have to do with Eris worship, but I do spend quite a bit of time on my knees nonetheless!!

ITT we discover a new and disturbing fetish, vomit-o-philia, in which the subject derives sufficient sexual pleasure from vomiting to ejaculate.

[The Johnny]

Oh, and before you start protesting your wannabe guru status, allow me to remind you:

Was just chatting with my scribe while you all were posting.  Proper responses in a bit.

Most of my people don't actually know much about Discordia, but are definitely gonna learn as they go.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS ASSBAGGERY?  YOU ARE AN ABOMINATION IN THE EYES OF THE SACRED WAYNE NEWTON.  THE TEMPLE MUST BE CLEANSED!

NOT the first time I've defiled a temple good sir.  I wouldn't say I even care to call what I have to do with Eris worship, but I do spend quite a bit of time on my knees nonetheless!!

ITT we discover a new and disturbing fetish, vomit-o-philia, in which the subject derives sufficient sexual pleasure from vomiting to ejaculate.

CALL ME CUPID, BUT I TIHNK I KNOW WHO WOULD MAKE A GREAT COUPLE.

[Epimetheus]

Oh, and before you start protesting your wannabe guru status, allow me to remind you:

Was just chatting with my scribe while you all were posting.  Proper responses in a bit.

Most of my people don't actually know much about Discordia, but are definitely gonna learn as they go.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS ASSBAGGERY?  YOU ARE AN ABOMINATION IN THE EYES OF THE SACRED WAYNE NEWTON.  THE TEMPLE MUST BE CLEANSED!

NOT the first time I've defiled a temple good sir.  I wouldn't say I even care to call what I have to do with Eris worship, but I do spend quite a bit of time on my knees nonetheless!!

ITT we discover a new and disturbing fetish, vomit-o-philia, in which the subject derives sufficient sexual pleasure from vomiting to ejaculate.

CALL ME CUPID, BUT I TIHNK I KNOW WHO WOULD MAKE A GREAT COUPLE.

They may be a lot of horrible things, but they're not gay!

[Doktor Howl]

Oh, and before you start protesting your wannabe guru status, allow me to remind you:

Was just chatting with my scribe while you all were posting.  Proper responses in a bit.

Most of my people don't actually know much about Discordia, but are definitely gonna learn as they go.

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS ASSBAGGERY?  YOU ARE AN ABOMINATION IN THE EYES OF THE SACRED WAYNE NEWTON.  THE TEMPLE MUST BE CLEANSED!

NOT the first time I've defiled a temple good sir.  I wouldn't say I even care to call what I have to do with Eris worship, but I do spend quite a bit of time on my knees nonetheless!!

Well, you and your "scribe" and your little followers have whatever it is that passes for "fun" in Reverend Moon territory.  I just wish you'd call it something else.  Like TEH WIZRAD JOE-ISM or some shit...Because from what I can see from your comments, you're just teaching monkeys to chase the mechanical rabbit in a different way.

You're a Goddamn disgrace.  Get the fuck off my planet.