Joseph- A very questionable Wizard

[P3nT4gR4m]

Erm... *malfunction* I don't think this has ever happened before I'm ... well ... what the hell do I do now? To flame or not to flame or to stop flaming or something 

[Doktor Howl]

Erm... *malfunction* I don't think this has ever happened before I'm ... well ... what the hell do I do now? To flame or not to flame or to stop flaming or something 

I got yer back.

FUCK YOU, PENT!

[P3nT4gR4m]

 

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

 

[The Wizard Joseph]

ARHHHH!!!!!!!!
 

How DARE you Ignorant wastes of Cosmic Consciousness Come come to Me and talk like you deserve MY Eternal Wisdom!

You should be THANKING me for taking the time to place my radiant hand upon this base keyboard to share the only truth you'll ever hear.


Even my most foolish comments are IN FACT dripping with hidden wisdom that shall shake the foundations of your world view if you can only remove yourself from from your lesser animal nature and receive it. 

I despair that none of you will.   



You are All WILL-less and wholly in the thrall of YOUR guru and false, misogynistic, pseudo-post-nihilistical messiah.

"Baby Dok DuHowlier" has made all of you into meaningless zombie slaves with the anti-enlightenment his spiders feed into your eyes as you foolishly sit, mouth agape, in front of these pathetic computational devices you have mistaken for parentage.

It truly is pathetic and I've made the first mistake in MY ENTIRE EXISTANCE (Um x-cuse me but you spell checker doesn't spell existance the way I do) in thinking that coming here to save you from him was possible.

YES!!! It is I and I alone that can free you, but you prefer you chains of silicon, smoke, and bile.

ERIS KNOWS  ME... in the biblical sense.  She has sent me, in her despair that after DECADES her children still don't get it. 

THEREFORE I now pass judgement.

YOU shall roll a 5 sided die and check the table below. (that's a 10 sider with results divided by 2 rounding up if you didn't get the Special Deluxe To Be Kept Forever and Ever Edition of Discord: A game of spags and fecal adventure and thereby failed to receive a 5 sided die)


1:  Your forum shall be flooded with Vegan hippy Christians that practice Chaos magicK and will argue at length about what movie is best to watch for maximum effect before rituals are to be performed on Skype and linked to here from Youtube.  They will be upon your every thread telling you that Jesus is the only way to unsee the s and relieve yourselves of the weight of you sins.

2:  There shall be a great scrambling of the threads committed by every secret society that you have ever foolishly disregarded as  nonsense.  THey are aware of your "existence" and only have held back until now because Eris is scarier than Lucifer and nobody wanted to stir up bad shit.  By my awesome power and Her rosy name print on my ass this ban is removed!!!!!  Uhn, Boo YAAAAH Yayeyh. Good luck reading the BIP in Reptilian cursive.

3:  Professor Cramulus and Cain will be abducted (flip a coin to see who gets the clean bag over their head).  Having lost not less than HALF of the site's intellectual capacity it shall descend into Fart jokes and half done, uninspired projects.  Until the time of their return this place will have only the joy of telling each other the same jokes and ripping on newbies.  They will be returned only so their despair can be made whole as they realize they're in a version of It's A Wonderful Life where there's no going back to the original world and that the angels they met in captivity are WAY hotter than anybody could have expected and may not feel a need to fix anything about the situation.

4:  I shall Summon Ben Mac- He Whose Name Shall Not Be Typed Completely. The Alfalfa & Yomega. He shall be granted an unlimited checkbook and a golden apple.  Yoyo of warding sold separately.

5:  Pineal overload!  Write a new table and roll twice.   Once on this table and once on the new one.  Disregard all results from the new one.

So I Have Written

So Mote It BE

Be Kind Please Rewind

Judgements Subject To Change Without Notice

555 555 55 55 5  555 55555 55 55 55 (to the tune of Jingle Bells, shame on you if you listen to the whole thing  )

I now return you to my sponsor.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Is that better guys?  Did I do it right?  I can never tell. 

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

  That was pretty damn good.

[The Wizard Joseph]

That was pretty damn good.

Thank you.   

[Don Coyote]

Sweet and sour fuck bawls. WHAT IS THIS SHIT?

[Doktor Howl]

"Baby Dok DuHowlier"

I CONFESS!  I KILLED PAPA DOC WITH MY VOODOO!  DON'T HIT ME AGAIN!

3:  Professor Cramulus and Cain will be abducted (flip a coin to see who gets the clean bag over their head).  Having lost not less than HALF of the site's intellectual capacity

Way to dump on LMNO, Payne, and Pent!  Well done.

[The Wizard Joseph]

"Baby Dok DuHowlier"

I CONFESS!  I KILLED PAPA DOC WITH MY VOODOO!  DON'T HIT ME AGAIN!

3:  Professor Cramulus and Cain will be abducted (flip a coin to see who gets the clean bag over their head).  Having lost not less than HALF of the site's intellectual capacity

Way to dump on LMNO, Payne, and Pent!  Well done.

Unintentional, but I was going for "outalndish jerk with pretensions of everything" so I guess it's just Collateral Success. 

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

You're still a PITA!





Just sayin......

[Triple Zero]

555 555 55 55 5  555 55555 55 55 55 (to the tune of Jingle Bells, shame on you if you listen to the whole thing  )

we have a better version linked at

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/goatse

CLICK IT

(oops that not jinglebells, gonna link it ANYWAY)

[The Wizard Joseph]

555 555 55 55 5  555 55555 55 55 55 (to the tune of Jingle Bells, shame on you if you listen to the whole thing  )

we have a better version linked at

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/goatse

CLICK IT

(oops that not jinglebells, gonna link it ANYWAY)

Ohhh...  I can't get it to stop.  Now the spiders in MY head are doing some kind of techno-funk mating dance.  At least it feels like a mating dance.

[The Wizard Joseph]

You're still a PITA!





Just sayin......

Not saying anything untrue.  What would you say if you were gonna lie about me?

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

You're still a PITA!





Just sayin......

Not saying anything untrue.  What would you say if you were gonna lie about me?

That you appeared to be a highly intelligent biped who had overcome the monkey syndrome and actually had a brain in your head, not cotton fluff......