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TO: Anyone who has purchased a home..

Started by Sir Squid Diddimus, September 03, 2011, 03:26:31 AM

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Sir Squid Diddimus

SRSLY WTF!!

This is supposed to be a happy moment and all I can do is pull my hair out and eat it. I've never done this before so I have no idea what to do.
I've been given deadlines for so much shit and my first thing is to secure a loan, but I only have a couple of days to do it so I can meet deadline for inspection/appraisal and all that other shit.
I think??
I also need insurance.. on something I don't even own yet? Can we wait till I sign something?

Anyone have any tips, advice, thorazine?

The Johnny


Ive seen cases of people buying a car, crashing on their way home, and didnt have insurance yet, luck and circumstance are a bitch.
<<My image in some places, is of a monster of some kind who wants to pull a string and manipulate people. Nothing could be further from the truth. People are manipulated; I just want them to be manipulated more effectively.>>

-B.F. Skinner

Precious Moments Zalgo

Yeah, it's totally stressful until after you close.  Everything YOU have to do is on a "time is of the essence" basis, but everybody else involved will drag their heels for weeks or months on the stuff they have to do.
I will answer ANY prayer for $39.95.*

*Unfortunately, I cannot give refunds in the event that the answer is no.

Sir Squid Diddimus


Suu

Call my parents.

No, really. They went through hell and back for their house and it was recent.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Sir Squid Diddimus on September 03, 2011, 03:26:31 AM
SRSLY WTF!!

This is supposed to be a happy moment and all I can do is pull my hair out and eat it. I've never done this before so I have no idea what to do.
I've been given deadlines for so much shit and my first thing is to secure a loan, but I only have a couple of days to do it so I can meet deadline for inspection/appraisal and all that other shit.
I think??
I also need insurance.. on something I don't even own yet? Can we wait till I sign something?

Anyone have any tips, advice, thorazine?

MORTGAGE BROKER.

Yes, you will end up paying them around a grand. But they will take care of EVERYTHING.

If you don't want to have a broker shop for your mortgage, first go to your own bank or, if you're financially a sure thing, a credit union, and apply for a mortgage.

You don't have to BUY insurance for the house before you sign for it; you just need to have a company picked out. Who has your auto policy? if they do homes, call them and get a quote. It should only take a few minutes, and then they're the ones you put on the form.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Sir Squid Diddimus

Insurance hunting has been hilarious so far.
"We don't insure Florida yet" "Why not?" --laughter-- what the hell??

"Please hold I have to transfer you to the department that handles Florida" "What? Why." "Well cause that state is like a whole other world" "Why cause we get rain storms in the summer?"

"Florida is prone to hurricanes and blah--" "Why cause we had a fluke season some 7 years ago? NC gets hit WAY more than we do"

This shit is almost comedy. Almost.
A mortgage broker I don't think I can afford. I kind of have to pinch every penny I can. I did just find out a couple of friends have a lot of experience with this so I have someone local to sit and talk to.
I don't want this to be hell. It should be exciting.

PS- this house is adorable and looks like a shack from the street, but it's tricky like the tardis cause it's built in a hill so the upstairs is on the street and the downstairs is in the backyard. How weird!

Eater of Clowns

Quote from: Sir Squid Diddimus on September 03, 2011, 01:34:22 PM
Insurance hunting has been hilarious so far.
"We don't insure Florida yet" "Why not?" --laughter-- what the hell??

"Please hold I have to transfer you to the department that handles Florida" "What? Why." "Well cause that state is like a whole other world" "Why cause we get rain storms in the summer?"

"Florida is prone to hurricanes and blah--" "Why cause we had a fluke season some 7 years ago? NC gets hit WAY more than we do"

This shit is almost comedy. Almost.
A mortgage broker I don't think I can afford. I kind of have to pinch every penny I can. I did just find out a couple of friends have a lot of experience with this so I have someone local to sit and talk to.
I don't want this to be hell. It should be exciting.

PS- this house is adorable and looks like a shack from the street, but it's tricky like the tardis cause it's built in a hill so the upstairs is on the street and the downstairs is in the backyard. How weird!

That's awesome!
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Suu

I just left the parentals a message for ya, Squid. Mom will probably call me back in a bit. I'll message you their numbers once I get the all-clear.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Adios

Quote from: Sir Squid Diddimus on September 03, 2011, 01:34:22 PM
Insurance hunting has been hilarious so far.
"We don't insure Florida yet" "Why not?" --laughter-- what the hell??

"Please hold I have to transfer you to the department that handles Florida" "What? Why." "Well cause that state is like a whole other world" "Why cause we get rain storms in the summer?"

"Florida is prone to hurricanes and blah--" "Why cause we had a fluke season some 7 years ago? NC gets hit WAY more than we do"

This shit is almost comedy. Almost.
A mortgage broker I don't think I can afford. I kind of have to pinch every penny I can. I did just find out a couple of friends have a lot of experience with this so I have someone local to sit and talk to.
I don't want this to be hell. It should be exciting.

PS- this house is adorable and looks like a shack from the street, but it's tricky like the tardis cause it's built in a hill so the upstairs is on the street and the downstairs is in the backyard. How weird!

You don't pay a mortgage broker out of pocket, their commission is paid by the lender and rolled back into the loan, cost of doing business thing. You will probably have to pay for your credit report to be ran though. Caution, if you have it run more than three times in a short time it red flags you. Your payment will probably be PITI, principle, interest, taxes and insurance. No lender will forward even one cent without insurance being in place.

If you think this is extremely stressful, never build your own home. That is about 30 times more so.

A $150,000 house over 20 years on an amortized loan even at a low interest rate will end up costing you around $300,000.  :lulz:

Purchasing a home is always stressful. You, your realtor, the lender, all have contractual time deadlines to meet, or a contract extension has to be signed by all parties.

When I was a realtor I had three lenders I worked with regularly, of course the buyer could go anywhere for the loan, but I preferred them to work with one that I had good connections with, it made the process go so much smoother because of improved communications. Two of them were good 'A' lenders and the other was a good 'B' and 'C' lender.

The key here is to try to relax. A lot of homes are bought and sold and the vast majority of deals go through just fine. Stay on your real estate agent, make sure the time lines are being met and that your agent is in daily communication with the other people involved with the deal, they should also be able to give you the names of three insurance companies who will do business in that area, if they are any good at all.

Suu

And there's no reason why Orlando should even have to meet the same standards as say, Pinellas County. You're at least 12 more inches above sea level than my parents.

Fortunately, they don't live below sea level like we used to.  :x
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

PopeTom

Here's what you do:

1) Purchase insurance for home you wish to buy, basically standard operating procedure.
2) Between paying for insurance and purchasing home hope disaster strikes and the home is destroyed.
2a) Only continue if said disaster occurs.
3) Back out of purchase.  You will lose your deposit but now you claim on the home insurance.
4) Buy an awesomer home now that you have a larger down payment.

NOTE:There is probably a world of things I'm missing in the above plan so in reality it is probably doomed to disaster.  DOOMED!!!!
-PopeTom

I am the result of 13.75 ± 0.13 billion years of random chance. Now that I exist I see no reason to start planning and organizing everything in my life.

Random dumb luck got me here, random dumb luck will get me to where I'm going.

Hail Eris!

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Dude, I have NEVER had to shop for my own insurance, whether I used a mortgage broker or not! Your loan officer should be able to recommend an insurance company if you don't already have one you want to to use.

But maybe things are THAT different in Florida. I know I don't envy you your insurance rates; it only costs a little more to insure my house than it does to insure my car. COMBINED, I pay about a thousand dollars a year. I guess that helps offset the retarculous real estate prices.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Sir Squid Diddimus

Ugh. Yeah, the insurance rates here are stupid. They don't even care what city/county you're in. They look at Florida as a whole and think the whole place is a hazard because they had to pay some people one time. Cunts. What a racket.

I've settled this stress thing down a bit and some friends have given me some sound advice. I should be happy right now. I'm mostly concerned about where the fuck I'm going to put all these shoes :/

Suu

Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."