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Dwarf porn star discovered partially eaten by badgers

Started by Iason Ouabache, September 15, 2011, 05:47:49 AM

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Iason Ouabache

September 15, 2011, 05:47:49 AM
Gordon Ramsay's Dwarf Porn Double Found Dead In A Badger Den

http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2011/09/gordon-ramsay-dwarf-porn-double-found-dead-badger-set

QuoteIn a bizarre case that would have even CSI's top investigators stumped, a dwarf porn star who was Gordon Ramsay's doppelganger was found dead in a badger set in the U.K. RadarOnline.com has learned.

Percy Foster, star of X-rated movie Hi-Ho Hi-Ho, It's Up Your A**e We Go, was about to be rocketed into the ranks of celebrity porn lookalikes due to his resemblance to the Hell's Kitchen host when his partially eaten body was discovered in a badger's den.

According to a report in U.K. tabloid The Sunday Sport, the 3'6" actor was found "deep in an underground chamber by Ministry of Agriculture experts ahead of a planned badger-gassing program near Tregaron, west Wales."

Expert CSI teams had to use fingertip technology to remove his body from the six-foot-deep burrow, and investigators have not yet ruled out the possibility of suicide.
You cannot fathom the immensity of the fuck i do not give.
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Juana

#1
September 15, 2011, 06:37:30 AM
:lulz: Death by badger!
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

Phox

#2
September 15, 2011, 07:46:38 AM
,,, There are no words for this....

Cain

#3
September 15, 2011, 09:11:16 AM
I thought there would be very little that could top the title of this thread.

After discovering this was the dwarf doppelganger of Gordon Ramsay, I decided I was wrong.

Faust

#4
September 15, 2011, 12:00:33 PM
Badgers need to be wiped out because of the danger they pose towards Terian Lanister.
Sleepless nights at the chateau

Luna

#5
September 15, 2011, 12:06:56 PM
Wait... Suicide by badger?
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Cain

#6
September 15, 2011, 12:20:46 PM
Quote from: Faust on September 15, 2011, 12:00:33 PM
Badgers need to be wiped out because of the danger they pose towards Terian Lanister.

Not to give away the plot of any further episodes/books of A Song of Fire and Ice but...yes, Tyrion Lannister is assassinated by a crack squad of badgers, hired by Littlefinger and operating out of Braavos.  It's very tragic, he never even sees them coming.

Nephew Twiddleton

#7
September 15, 2011, 12:27:00 PM
Is this story legit?

I'm having a hard time believing this one.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Cain

#8
September 15, 2011, 12:29:48 PM
It was, apparently, first reported by the Sunday Sport.  There is some speculation out there that this means it may be...less than factual...

El Sjaako

#9
September 15, 2011, 03:07:52 PM
This is too good to be true.

Doktor Howl

#10
September 15, 2011, 03:10:32 PM
If this is proven false, I will stomp on a kitten.
Molon Lube

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#12
September 15, 2011, 06:18:31 PM
This is EPIC. It had better be true.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

AFK

#13
September 16, 2011, 07:06:21 PM
So that's what Badger of God has been up to since she left.
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#14
September 17, 2011, 03:27:06 PM
Quote from: The R-tist Sometimes Known as WHN on September 16, 2011, 07:06:21 PM
So that's what Badger of God has been up to since she left.

Ofuk  :lulz:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

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