Forms of Discordian Belief

[Cramulus]

Discordian Monotheism: I believe in Eris, in the sense that she is a cosmic entity outside of me that I sometimes hang with. There is no Goddess but Eris and she is my Goddess.

Discordian Polytheism: Eris is just one of several Gods I roll with.

Discordian Atheism: I don't believe in Cosmic Superbeings. Eris is a metaphor who I think is cool.

Discordian Agnosticism: I identify with the concept of Eris, but I don't think we can know whether Eris/Gods are real or not.



What is this list missing?

[Cainad (dec.)]

Discordian Situationism: Whether or not I behave in a manner consistent with a genuine belief in either the existence or metaphorical meaning of Eris depends on my current circumstances.

[Doktor Howl]

Discordian Gnostic Agnostic:  Eris?  WHO NEEDS HER?

[Cain]

Discordian Pantheism:  Eris is the Universe (we're all fucked.  Especially you).

[Cramulus]

Discordian Gnostic Agnostic:  Eris?  WHO NEEDS HER?

 

*puts on his straight face*

actually I kinda like that term

Gnosticism includes this idea that there is a spiritual world hidden behind this one, but we forget that we are a part of it because we're distracted by the corrupt material world.

So Discordian Gnosticism suggests that Primal Chaos lies hidden behind all things, but we don't see it because we're distracted by the illusions of order and disorder. (see also: like 30% of the Chao Te Ching)

So Discordian Agnostic Gnosticism suggests that there might be primal chaos hidden behind all things, but we can't really know because how-can-you-know-chaos, and also the word Chaos is just a metaphor we use to try to understand things and that in itself is misleading.

[Cain]

Discordian Maltheism:  Eris is a real goddess, and boy, she really doesn't like you.

Discordian Henotheism: Eris exists.  So do other gods.  But those other gods suck, I'm sticking with Eris.

Discordian Apatheism:  I don't care if Eris exists or not.

Discordian Deism:  Eris created the Universe, in order to confuse physicists, but has since retired and/or is involved in the creation of other Universes.

Discordian Transtheism: Eris is something to surpass.

[Faust]

Discordian Schizoism - Any of the above but ask me again after lunch if that answer isn't good enough.

Discordian Nihilism - Eris exists, but only during the fertile months and exclusively on the banks of the river Nile.

[El Sjaako]

Discordian Implication If there is a god, it's Eris

I'm misquoting that from somewhere, I'm not sure where.

[Lenin McCarthy]

Discordian Ignosticism: Define God, please. If I'm happy with that definition, then I'll believe in Eris. If I'm not, then the whole question is meaningless.

[Cainad (dec.)]

Discordian Schizoism - Any of the above but ask me again after lunch if that answer isn't good enough.

Discordian Nihilism - Eris exists, but only during the fertile months and exclusively on the banks of the river Nile.

[Triple Zero]

Discordian Pantyism:  Only into Discordianism for the chicks and getting in their panties.

Discordian Maltism: Finding Eris exists at the bottom of really good beers.

Discordian Apothecarism: PILLS HERE

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

Discordian Buddhism: Eris does/doesn't exist. Are we talking the ultimate level or the relative level?

[Thurnez Isa]

Discordian New Agism Ya, ya... fairy wood spirits... whatever... Can I get laid now?

[Cainad (dec.)]

Discordian SubGeniusism: Eris is the only being that "Bob" acknowledges above and beyond himself, except when he doesn't. Which is probably more often than is strictly healthy.

Discordian Discordianism: If anyone actually succeeded in practicing this, we'd probably be able to tell by the spontaneous formation of a quantum singularity inside their skull.

[Faust]

Discordian Scientology - Tell people how they have been living their lives wrong, win fabulous prizes.