Author Topic: Forgiveness  (Read 5359 times)

BadBeast

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Forgiveness
« on: October 03, 2011, 05:38:39 am »
To the driver of that green mk1 Ford Fiesta. (They know who they are)

Look, what you did, all that time ago has been burning inside me like a fire, ever since you did it, to the extent that I've lost weeks of my life, just planning revenge, and destruction to be visited upon you, by me, at the first opportunity, you fucking nasty evil motherfucker
I have walked through a red mist, of your spilled lifeblood for so long, it became a constant scream that never stopped, not for a minute, and even now, is baying for me to take your life.  I hope against hope, the consequences of what you did, have not been gentle with you. I like to think you have suffered greatly because of your actions, as did your victim. However, I'm telling you this because I've decided that I'm no longer seeking your death, or going to kill you. You know what you've done, and you know I have every reason to strike you down in vengeance and retribution. But. . . . . . I forgive you.

But I can no longer be bothered with it, and I'm writing this, to you, just in case you were unaware of how much your actions have affected my life. 
I trust next time you want to want to drive too fast around a corner, you'll think of my poor dead, squashed Tigger Puss, and slow down, you Cat murdering bastard!

OK, I'm done, the cat is long dead, I'm not consumed with revenge anymore, but you are still a cat killing motherfucker!
Love, BadBeast.
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

ͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅ ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #1 on: October 04, 2011, 09:54:53 am »
I felt bad for your cat, dude, but I loled.
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BadBeast

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #2 on: October 04, 2011, 09:59:22 am »
I felt bad for your cat, dude, but I loled.
Well, it was over 30 years ago now. I thought it's probably about time to drop it.
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

ͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅ ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #3 on: October 04, 2011, 10:14:08 am »
I hated trucks for a while, because one splatted my buddy's kitten's head all over the driveway when we were about 10right in front of us.

I was all, "It's still moving! We've got to get it to a hospital!"

"No. It's dead," he said calmly.

"Maybe the doctors can put it's eye back in!" I was adamant.

He shook his head and just grabbed a shovel and scraped it into a garbage can. That guy is a cop now.

And surprise, I'm a metrosexual, hipster artiste.
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BadBeast

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #4 on: October 04, 2011, 10:54:38 am »
I sublimated my hatred by spending years and years scraping roadkill off the road, tagging it, bagging it, and giving it a decent Christian burial. But I had to stop, because folks react so badly to seeing someone digging holes in the Churchyard at night. Burying families of foxes, or Swans that I'd pick out of my radiator grille every evening. Even the odd Horse or Deer. Dead ones of course. Well, mostly dead. And I only dug those old graves up because I'd needed the space to bury a pair of Salukis that belonged to my Landlord. It was obviously not any kind of Zomby thing like those kids thought when they saw where I'd  hidden the bodies up a tree. Outside their classroom. The crows were a nice touch, but nothing to do with me.

"Crows seen feeding on the flesh of tree climbing Zombies" is not the kind of headline a responsible Local Newspaper wants on it's front page. Not twice in a three week period, anyway. So I ha to find another way to contain the seething magma of hatred that I nurtured for so very long. So I began avenging my poor kitty, by attacking Ford Fiestas. At first. Then any Ford became a potential target. And their owners. And their families. I suppose, in my slightly eccentric turn of mind, I thought I'd get around to the real culprit by a long, slow process of elimination. Eventually. But what if they tried to throw me off the scent by changing their car? I thought long and hard about this.  Then decided to venginate on Vauxhalls too. Just in case.

This was all a long time ago now, I gave up revenge and embraced forgiveness,  yesterday, the day before that maybe. Now, looking back on my "cross phase" as I like to think of it, 30 years seems such a long time. To be grieving for a Pet in such creative and interesting ways, for so very long, seems to be slightly odd, but I fucking loved that little puppy!

I mean Cat.  :oops: 
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

ͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅ ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #5 on: October 04, 2011, 11:13:13 am »
So did you have a mild stroke yesterday or what?

Because regardless of what happened to your pet, Fords deserve it.

You were doing those people a favor.
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ͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅ ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #6 on: October 04, 2011, 11:15:42 am »
Wait, what did you do to the Ford owner's families?
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BadBeast

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #7 on: October 04, 2011, 11:21:32 am »
So did you have a mild stroke yesterday or what?

Because regardless of what happened to your pet, Fords deserve it.

You were doing those people a favor.
More of an epiphany really. I know the Ford thing was a service, really. But Why should I spend my grief  doing every Ford within a five mile radius, for nothing? I had already driven the Cortina to extinction, And the Granada! how much can one man expected to do? I know, the Ka is a cheap, nasty slag of a car, but there are too many of the fuckers! So I forgave them. Fogave them all, out of the forgiveness of my heart. They can drive round in a much reduced risk of destruction by fire now. And there have been no spontaneous explosions for ages. Nearly two days. So forgiveness is a wonderful gift to give the World. I think.
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

BadBeast

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #8 on: October 04, 2011, 11:24:30 am »
Wait, what did you do to the Ford owner's families?
Oh. You caught that bit too then. Well, I drove up their Motor insurance premiums considerably. But they could have stopped all that by getting a Nissan or a Mitsubishi. It's not Experimental Rocket science.. Not anymore, anyway.  :wink:
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

ͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅ ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #9 on: October 04, 2011, 11:54:09 am »
So did you have a mild stroke yesterday or what?

Because regardless of what happened to your pet, Fords deserve it.

You were doing those people a favor.
More of an epiphany really. I know the Ford thing was a service, really. But Why should I spend my grief  doing every Ford within a five mile radius, for nothing? I had already driven the Cortina to extinction, And the Granada! how much can one man expected to do? I know, the Ka is a cheap, nasty slag of a car, but there are too many of the fuckers! So I forgave them. Fogave them all, out of the forgiveness of my heart. They can drive round in a much reduced risk of destruction by fire now. And there have been no spontaneous explosions for ages. Nearly two days. So forgiveness is a wonderful gift to give the World. I think.

It's a slippery slope. One day you're forgiving the asshole who ran over your Tanuki, next you're licking plutocrat buttholes.

Forgiveness. Not even once.

During that "epiphany", are you sure you didn't lose feeling in half of your body?
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BadBeast

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #10 on: October 04, 2011, 11:58:12 am »
So did you have a mild stroke yesterday or what?

Because regardless of what happened to your pet, Fords deserve it.

You were doing those people a favor.
More of an epiphany really. I know the Ford thing was a service, really. But Why should I spend my grief  doing every Ford within a five mile radius, for nothing? I had already driven the Cortina to extinction, And the Granada! how much can one man expected to do? I know, the Ka is a cheap, nasty slag of a car, but there are too many of the fuckers! So I forgave them. Fogave them all, out of the forgiveness of my heart. They can drive round in a much reduced risk of destruction by fire now. And there have been no spontaneous explosions for ages. Nearly two days. So forgiveness is a wonderful gift to give the World. I think.

It's a slippery slope. One day you're forgiving the asshole who ran over your Tanuki, next you're licking plutocrat buttholes.

Forgiveness. Not even once.

During that "epiphany", are you sure you didn't lose feeling in half of your body?
Not to my knowledge, no. But I'll double check, to be sure. . . .. . . . . .Nope. (Which half, btw?)  :?
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

ͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅ ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #11 on: October 04, 2011, 12:05:32 pm »
So did you have a mild stroke yesterday or what?

Because regardless of what happened to your pet, Fords deserve it.

You were doing those people a favor.
More of an epiphany really. I know the Ford thing was a service, really. But Why should I spend my grief  doing every Ford within a five mile radius, for nothing? I had already driven the Cortina to extinction, And the Granada! how much can one man expected to do? I know, the Ka is a cheap, nasty slag of a car, but there are too many of the fuckers! So I forgave them. Fogave them all, out of the forgiveness of my heart. They can drive round in a much reduced risk of destruction by fire now. And there have been no spontaneous explosions for ages. Nearly two days. So forgiveness is a wonderful gift to give the World. I think.

It's a slippery slope. One day you're forgiving the asshole who ran over your Tanuki, next you're licking plutocrat buttholes.

Forgiveness. Not even once.

During that "epiphany", are you sure you didn't lose feeling in half of your body?
Not to my knowledge, no. But I'll double check, to be sure. . . .. . . . . .Nope. (Which half, btw?)  :?

The half that didn't suffer a stroke.

Doesn't that happen to you old guys every other week or something?
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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #12 on: October 04, 2011, 12:18:12 pm »
It appears I accidentally ran over your funny.

My apologies good sir. It was such a tenderhearted funny.
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BadBeast

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #13 on: October 04, 2011, 12:19:20 pm »
So did you have a mild stroke yesterday or what?

Because regardless of what happened to your pet, Fords deserve it.

You were doing those people a favor.
More of an epiphany really. I know the Ford thing was a service, really. But Why should I spend my grief  doing every Ford within a five mile radius, for nothing? I had already driven the Cortina to extinction, And the Granada! how much can one man expected to do? I know, the Ka is a cheap, nasty slag of a car, but there are too many of the fuckers! So I forgave them. Fogave them all, out of the forgiveness of my heart. They can drive round in a much reduced risk of destruction by fire now. And there have been no spontaneous explosions for ages. Nearly two days. So forgiveness is a wonderful gift to give the World. I think.

It's a slippery slope. One day you're forgiving the asshole who ran over your Tanuki, next you're licking plutocrat buttholes.

Forgiveness. Not even once.

During that "epiphany", are you sure you didn't lose feeling in half of your body?
Not to my knowledge, no. But I'll double check, to be sure. . . .. . . . . .Nope. (Which half, btw?)  :?

The half that didn't suffer a stroke.

Doesn't that happen to you old guys every other week or something?
It has been known to happen. But only to people at least 15 years older than myself. I'm not elderly, just approaching middle age. Ish.
"We need a plane for Bombing, Strafing, Assault and Battery, Interception, Ground Support, and Reconaissance,
NOT JUST A "FAIR WEATHER FIGHTER"!

"I kinda like him. It's like he sees inside my soul" ~ Nigel


Whoever puts their hand on me to govern me, is a usurper, and a tyrant, and I declare them my enemy!

"And when the clouds obscure the moon, and normal service is resumed. It wont. Mean. A. Thing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpkCJDYxH-4

ͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅ ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞

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Re: Forgiveness
« Reply #14 on: October 04, 2011, 01:06:44 pm »
So did you have a mild stroke yesterday or what?

Because regardless of what happened to your pet, Fords deserve it.

You were doing those people a favor.
More of an epiphany really. I know the Ford thing was a service, really. But Why should I spend my grief  doing every Ford within a five mile radius, for nothing? I had already driven the Cortina to extinction, And the Granada! how much can one man expected to do? I know, the Ka is a cheap, nasty slag of a car, but there are too many of the fuckers! So I forgave them. Fogave them all, out of the forgiveness of my heart. They can drive round in a much reduced risk of destruction by fire now. And there have been no spontaneous explosions for ages. Nearly two days. So forgiveness is a wonderful gift to give the World. I think.

It's a slippery slope. One day you're forgiving the asshole who ran over your Tanuki, next you're licking plutocrat buttholes.

Forgiveness. Not even once.

During that "epiphany", are you sure you didn't lose feeling in half of your body?
Not to my knowledge, no. But I'll double check, to be sure. . . .. . . . . .Nope. (Which half, btw?)  :?

The half that didn't suffer a stroke.

Doesn't that happen to you old guys every other week or something?
It has been known to happen. But only to people at least 15 years older than myself. I'm not elderly, just approaching middle age. Ish.

So you just decided to stop firebombing Ford Fiestas on a whim?

It just doesn't add up Beast.
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