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Started by P3nT4gR4m, October 08, 2011, 02:00:08 AM

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Telarus

Damn, you've got some great coastal terrain in your area.
Telarus, KSC,
.__.  Keeper of the Contradictory Cephalopod, Zenarchist Swordsman,
(0o)  Tender to the Edible Zen Garden, Ratcheting Metallic Sex Doll of The End Times,
/||\   Episkopos of the Amorphous Dreams Cabal

Join the Doll Underground! Experience the Phantasmagorical Safari!

P3nT4gR4m

Hell yeah! Scottish west coast is the stuff of legends - all fjords and mountains. East coast is ugly as shit but the surf is good.

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

P3nT4gR4m


I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.

Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on May 15, 2012, 10:14:30 PM
BUMP!

Moar me and my tiny little boat shenanigans

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzO1HirmAzE

"This video contains content from EMI, who has blocked it in your country on copyright grounds. Sorry about that."
Weevil-Infested Badfun Wrongsex Referee From The 9th Earth
Slick and Deranged Wombat of Manhood Questioning
Hulking Dormouse of Lust and DESPAIR™
Gatling Geyser of Rainbow AIDS

"The only way we can ever change anything is to look in the mirror and find no enemy." - Akala  'Find No Enemy'.

P3nT4gR4m

I really need to check the copyright holders before I use these tracks. Sony and UMG are fine (they only block in germany and japan) but EMI are useless cocksuckers who really don't deserve the free advertising I give them.

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Luna

... You make me want to try this...

And, given the fact that I am TERRFIED of water, and swim like a rock, that's saying something.

(Richter and Suu have seen me in swimming pools a couple of times...  Mostly I cling to the side like a barnacle, unless I KNOW I can stand and keep my head out of the water, or if I actively force myself to get off the bloody wall.  "Not a strong swimmer" doesn't even begin to cover it.)
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

P3nT4gR4m

I can swim just fine but it bores the piss out of me. Fortunately with a buoyancy aid on I don't have to swim I just float there. Being scared of water is a bit different, tho. Most kayak noobs are fearful of capsizing and getting stuck in the boat and whatnot. This is why the first thing I do with beginners is capsize them and I keep doing it until they either give up and run away screaming (which hasn't happened yet) or they get comfortable with the idea of being upside down in a kayak in the water.

The reason for this is it's really fucking dangerous (not to mention annoying) trying to rescue someone who is freaking out and trying to climb on top of you and stuff. Calm victims make the whole procedure much more straightforward. So next we train you how to be a good little victim. I usually do this by falling in first and getting you to rescue me. This way, when I'm teaching you how to be rescued, you know why I'm telling you to do things a certain way. Experienced victims are even better than calm ones.

By this time you're comfortable being upside down in the water, coming out your boat and getting back in it. All in I can teach you it inside a couple of hours. After that there's no fear - just a bit of frustration as you try to learn the difficult stuff but you can take your time with that. Mostly it's just fun.

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Luna

Except, of course, that the first time you flipped me over, I'd have a fairly epic freakout.  My head goes under water, and my brains go right out my ears.  I've gotten better, had some very patient friends who worked with me over the years, which means I'm willing to get IN to water, and maybe, occasionally, go where my feet won't reach the bottom...  And, if I build up the nerve, I can duck my head under...  But, panic attack city.

It looks amazing...  But just the thought of being trapped in one of those things, up-side-down, with my head under water, is enough to raise my pulse rate sitting here in my nice, comfy chair.  :(
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

P3nT4gR4m

Sounds like you got yourself a honest to god phobia there. Dunno how to fix that.

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Triple Zero

Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on May 16, 2012, 07:41:21 AM
I really need to check the copyright holders before I use these tracks. Sony and UMG are fine (they only block in germany and japan) but EMI are useless cocksuckers who really don't deserve the free advertising I give them.

You might try if they police Vimeo less stringently?
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

P3nT4gR4m

Vimeo is useless. Without paying for it they slap you with a half gig per week upload limit. My shorts come in somewhere between 750 megs and a gig so I'd have to split them in half and upload 4 minute clips in 2 weekly instalments or compress the living shit out them. Or I could pay for the privilege of uploading significantly smaller files than Youtube gives me for free. Yeah sure there's the - Google are teh devil - thing but luckily for me I couldn't give a fuck about all that.

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Luna

Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on May 16, 2012, 04:20:04 PM
Sounds like you got yourself a honest to god phobia there. Dunno how to fix that.

Yup.  With full-blown panic attacks, on bad days. 

Mostly I deal with it by staying the fuck out of the water unless I'm in a really good mood...  And I'm careful not to let my head go under water unless I bloody well MEAN to go there.  And I DO go into the water, scared of it or not, just to show myself I CAN, and I am NOT TOTALLY fucked if I get shoved into the deep end of the pool.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

P3nT4gR4m


I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

P3nT4gR4m

Came back from summer holidays with about 30 hours of video and 500-odd photos. Finally started the daunting task of cutting some clips together.

this is Taransay, off the west coat of Harris (where they make the tweed) on the Outer Hebrides. Half a meter of windswell banging off the rocks makes for a chilled out rockhopping session. It's not big enough yet to be dangerous but it's interesting enough to be fun

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzTqjC0iT2M

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

P3nT4gR4m

#44
Ever looked into the eye of a whale?...


There's a punchline, too - it was a life changing experience. No joke. You ever have one of those experiences where you realise that that one thing you thought was the most awesome experience of your life was actually pretty dull? You know the effect that moment has, as it backflushes through your entire lifes catalogue of awesome memories, marking everything down by ten? This was one of those moments.

I've been going out to sea for most of my life. I need to go there. It's the only place I feel like I belong. I need to get lost in the wilderness, get the fuck away from the meaningless bullshit that is the rest of my life. Real life some call it. Seems more fake to me than the life I experience when I'm miles away from dry land.

Ailsa Craig is a large volcanic plug which rises from the ocean floor, eleven hundred feet straight up in the air, two miles in circumference, ten miles off the west coast of Girvan. A twelve mile open crossing in a sea kayak is a serious undertaking and today I'm doing two of them.

This trip marks the top of my game. I've never tackled anything this big, this serious but, on the other hand, I know our team is more than up to it. FNG will get the beasting of his life but me and my wingman, Neil, have been ready for years. We just never got the weather when we had the time.

Half way out to the rock and distant thunder, rolling across us from the harbour we left an hour or two behind, reminds us just how exposed we are out here. I'm stoked, we've gone past the point of no return. Now "Paddy's milestone" is closer to us than where we came from and that means that, even if something goes horribly wrong, the quickest route to dry land puts us on our target. We're going to Ailsa Craig!

The plan is to head out to Ailsa Craig, land, grab some lunch and then head on to Kildonan on the isle of Arran, another twelve miles to the North. The next day we complete the triangle with a thirteen mile crossing back to Maidens.

So we're halfway to Ailsa Craig, flying along on some quartering swell, then waiting on FNG catching us up. He's not got the hang of surfing yet and is taking ages, backing off every wave that offers him a lift. Suddenly the sky is filled with gulls and razorbills, circling around in a feeding frenzy. Then Neil shouts "Dolphin!"

I've been kayaking for thirty-odd years, sea tripping for more than twenty of those and, in all that taime, I've never seen a dolphin. I've missed dozens of trips, for whatever reason and tales of dolphin sightings have come back from several of these. It's become one of those things that sits near the top of my bucket list.

I follow the line he's pointing and I see it arcing out the water, half a mile away, on the horizon. I'm double stoked now. Ailsa Craig and a dolphin sighting in one day but it aint over yet. A couple of minutes later and it broaches fifty yards to our right. Something is wrong, tho. I've seen dolphins on TV, they're not that big. Maybe I imagined it but I could have sworn Flipper was longer than my boat. my eighteen foot kayak.

Then it came up right next to me. Less than a dozen meters to my left. It was enormous, easy twenty feet, maybe add another couple to that. I was thinking Orca but the rational part of my brain told me it was the wrong colour and the dorsal fin was the wrong shape. More like the shape of a surf curl than the long pointy thing that grows out of a killer whale's back.

Unbeknown to us, what we'd just seen was a Pilot Whale, second largest of the family Delphinidae, the dolphin family. It spotted us half a mile away, swam over and circled round us, checking us out. It was an exhilirating, emotional and, most importantly, humbling experience. Here was this huge fucking creature, granting us passage through it's space. I realised that I don't, in fact, belong here. I am merely blessed with the opportunity to pass through on occasion and, right at that moment, I realised this.

For some reason it's important to me to post some evidence of this experience. Like if you see for yourself what we saw, you'd get the same effect but I know that's not the way it works or I'd have felt the way I did that day a hundred times or more, watching youtube. Regardless, here's a short clip Neil's GoPro caught from the back deck of his kayak.

http://youtu.be/9WYepywiftE?hd=1

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark