Nigel, I've been considering the hippie shortage, and...

[The Good Reverend Roger]

...I think I've spotted the causes of your problem.

1.  Love beads should not have a pull-start handle on the end.

2.  The chemical formula for patchouli is NOT H₂SO₄.

3.  They can't keep up with the car, no matter how much they love you.  Therefore, you should not chain them to the back bumper by the neck.

4.  If you don't believe they love you enough, cut them loose.  Handing them a secret service handbook and demanding they prove themselves only leads to tragedy.

If you have any further questions, I'll let the lab geeks know.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

...I think I've spotted the causes of your problem.

1.  Love beads should not have a pull-start handle on the end.

2.  The chemical formula for patchouli is NOT H₂SO₄.

3.  They can't keep up with the car, no matter how much they love you.  Therefore, you should not chain them to the back bumper by the neck.

4.  If you don't believe they love you enough, cut them loose.  Handing them a secret service handbook and demanding they prove themselves only leads to tragedy.

If you have any further questions, I'll let the lab geeks know.

But Reverend! They LIKE the pull-start motor; I can tell from the noises they make! And patchouli, whatever... my formula makes them smell so much better.

Even hippies need exercise, and... doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

...I think I've spotted the causes of your problem.

1.  Love beads should not have a pull-start handle on the end.

2.  The chemical formula for patchouli is NOT H₂SO₄.

3.  They can't keep up with the car, no matter how much they love you.  Therefore, you should not chain them to the back bumper by the neck.

4.  If you don't believe they love you enough, cut them loose.  Handing them a secret service handbook and demanding they prove themselves only leads to tragedy.

If you have any further questions, I'll let the lab geeks know.

But Reverend! They LIKE the pull-start motor; I can tell from the noises they make! And patchouli, whatever... my formula makes them smell so much better.

Even hippies need exercise, and... doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? 

Oh, I don't disapprove, Nigel...But this IS why we can't have nice things.  Remember the passenger pigeon.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

...I think I've spotted the causes of your problem.

1.  Love beads should not have a pull-start handle on the end.

2.  The chemical formula for patchouli is NOT H₂SO₄.

3.  They can't keep up with the car, no matter how much they love you.  Therefore, you should not chain them to the back bumper by the neck.

4.  If you don't believe they love you enough, cut them loose.  Handing them a secret service handbook and demanding they prove themselves only leads to tragedy.

If you have any further questions, I'll let the lab geeks know.

But Reverend! They LIKE the pull-start motor; I can tell from the noises they make! And patchouli, whatever... my formula makes them smell so much better.

Even hippies need exercise, and... doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? 

Oh, I don't disapprove, Nigel...But this IS why we can't have nice things.  Remember the passenger pigeon.

I'm only trying to be helpful.

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

...I think I've spotted the causes of your problem.

1.  Love beads should not have a pull-start handle on the end.

2.  The chemical formula for patchouli is NOT H₂SO₄.

3.  They can't keep up with the car, no matter how much they love you.  Therefore, you should not chain them to the back bumper by the neck.

4.  If you don't believe they love you enough, cut them loose.  Handing them a secret service handbook and demanding they prove themselves only leads to tragedy.

If you have any further questions, I'll let the lab geeks know.

But Reverend! They LIKE the pull-start motor; I can tell from the noises they make! And patchouli, whatever... my formula makes them smell so much better.

Even hippies need exercise, and... doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? 

Oh, I don't disapprove, Nigel...But this IS why we can't have nice things.  Remember the passenger pigeon.

That's right... the passenger pigeon was a total hippie which is why they didn't have driver's licenses... just bummed rides off of other birds.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

...I think I've spotted the causes of your problem.

1.  Love beads should not have a pull-start handle on the end.

2.  The chemical formula for patchouli is NOT H₂SO₄.

3.  They can't keep up with the car, no matter how much they love you.  Therefore, you should not chain them to the back bumper by the neck.

4.  If you don't believe they love you enough, cut them loose.  Handing them a secret service handbook and demanding they prove themselves only leads to tragedy.

If you have any further questions, I'll let the lab geeks know.

But Reverend! They LIKE the pull-start motor; I can tell from the noises they make! And patchouli, whatever... my formula makes them smell so much better.

Even hippies need exercise, and... doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? 

Oh, I don't disapprove, Nigel...But this IS why we can't have nice things.  Remember the passenger pigeon.

I'm only trying to be helpful.

Um.

Roger fucking Bannister couldn't keep up if he was wearing Birkenstocks.  If you keep this up, OkCupid will be a WASTELAND.  It'll just be you and some midget that totally isn't me.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

...I think I've spotted the causes of your problem.

1.  Love beads should not have a pull-start handle on the end.

2.  The chemical formula for patchouli is NOT H₂SO₄.

3.  They can't keep up with the car, no matter how much they love you.  Therefore, you should not chain them to the back bumper by the neck.

4.  If you don't believe they love you enough, cut them loose.  Handing them a secret service handbook and demanding they prove themselves only leads to tragedy.

If you have any further questions, I'll let the lab geeks know.

But Reverend! They LIKE the pull-start motor; I can tell from the noises they make! And patchouli, whatever... my formula makes them smell so much better.

Even hippies need exercise, and... doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? 

Oh, I don't disapprove, Nigel...But this IS why we can't have nice things.  Remember the passenger pigeon.

I'm only trying to be helpful.

Um.

Roger fucking Bannister couldn't keep up if he was wearing Birkenstocks.  If you keep this up, OkCupid will be a WASTELAND.  It'll just be you and some midget that totally isn't me.

I was thinking about hitting on that midget, if you're talking about the one with the robe and the beads. Should I not?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

...I think I've spotted the causes of your problem.

1.  Love beads should not have a pull-start handle on the end.

2.  The chemical formula for patchouli is NOT H₂SO₄.

3.  They can't keep up with the car, no matter how much they love you.  Therefore, you should not chain them to the back bumper by the neck.

4.  If you don't believe they love you enough, cut them loose.  Handing them a secret service handbook and demanding they prove themselves only leads to tragedy.

If you have any further questions, I'll let the lab geeks know.

But Reverend! They LIKE the pull-start motor; I can tell from the noises they make! And patchouli, whatever... my formula makes them smell so much better.

Even hippies need exercise, and... doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? 

Oh, I don't disapprove, Nigel...But this IS why we can't have nice things.  Remember the passenger pigeon.

I'm only trying to be helpful.

Um.

Roger fucking Bannister couldn't keep up if he was wearing Birkenstocks.  If you keep this up, OkCupid will be a WASTELAND.  It'll just be you and some midget that totally isn't me.

I was thinking about hitting on that midget, if you're talking about the one with the robe and the beads. Should I not?

Roger ponders his next move, balancing the prospect of getting a date with the Dark Empress versus that of being started like a lawnmower on the wrong end...IS there a downside, here?

Yep.  Go for it.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

...I think I've spotted the causes of your problem.

1.  Love beads should not have a pull-start handle on the end.

2.  The chemical formula for patchouli is NOT H₂SO₄.

3.  They can't keep up with the car, no matter how much they love you.  Therefore, you should not chain them to the back bumper by the neck.

4.  If you don't believe they love you enough, cut them loose.  Handing them a secret service handbook and demanding they prove themselves only leads to tragedy.

If you have any further questions, I'll let the lab geeks know.

But Reverend! They LIKE the pull-start motor; I can tell from the noises they make! And patchouli, whatever... my formula makes them smell so much better.

Even hippies need exercise, and... doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? 

Oh, I don't disapprove, Nigel...But this IS why we can't have nice things.  Remember the passenger pigeon.

I'm only trying to be helpful.

Um.

Roger fucking Bannister couldn't keep up if he was wearing Birkenstocks.  If you keep this up, OkCupid will be a WASTELAND.  It'll just be you and some midget that totally isn't me.

I was thinking about hitting on that midget, if you're talking about the one with the robe and the beads. Should I not?

Roger ponders his next move, balancing the prospect of getting a date with the Dark Empress versus that of being started like a lawnmower on the wrong end...IS there a downside, here?

Yep.  Go for it.

[Luna]

Let me know before you cross the Mississippi, would ya, Nigel?  There might be SOMETHING in there I might want to use before you...  Dear god, what IS it you did to that last one?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Let me know before you cross the Mississippi, would ya, Nigel?  There might be SOMETHING in there I might want to use before you...  Dear god, what IS it you did to that last one?

He was being obstinate, and needed a lesson. 

[trix]

Roger, I'm going to have to pass along the advice I was once given by a Doktor.

Remember the guy who stepped on her cigarettes?  REMEMBER?

Never forget what that woman is capable of.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Roger, I'm going to have to pass along the advice I was once given by a Doktor.

Remember the guy who stepped on her cigarettes?  REMEMBER?

Never forget what that woman is capable of.

You have to bear in mind that I have no survival instincts.

[Luna]

Let me know before you cross the Mississippi, would ya, Nigel?  There might be SOMETHING in there I might want to use before you...  Dear god, what IS it you did to that last one?

He was being obstinate, and needed a lesson. 

Nigel, how are they supposed to learn their lessons if they can't find all of their brains afterwards?  They STILL haven't found all of the parts of that one.  The map you left (out of the kindness of your heart) was useless after the blood dried and flaked off the skin parchment.  Half of the brains did turn up in that pet store, floating in the empty tank between the African cichlids and the piranhas, but the rest?  (Writing "Think Tank" on the front of the tank?  That poor pet store clerk twitches every time she walks past the fish room, now, and they can't actually get her IN there to fetch so much as a guppy any more.)

Really, you should think about the collateral damage...

I mean, the place where you left his junk hanging was creative, I mean really spectacular, it made a STATEMENT, but that whole high school football team is gonna be in therapy for the next six years.  (Other than the quarterback, obviously, but the doctors say that he'll PROBABLY recover some cognitive function after a the electroshock therapy finally hits the memory and burns it out.)

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Let me know before you cross the Mississippi, would ya, Nigel?  There might be SOMETHING in there I might want to use before you...  Dear god, what IS it you did to that last one?

He was being obstinate, and needed a lesson. 

Nigel, how are they supposed to learn their lessons if they can't find all of their brains afterwards?  They STILL haven't found all of the parts of that one.  The map you left (out of the kindness of your heart) was useless after the blood dried and flaked off the skin parchment.  Half of the brains did turn up in that pet store, floating in the empty tank between the African cichlids and the piranhas, but the rest?  (Writing "Think Tank" on the front of the tank?  That poor pet store clerk twitches every time she walks past the fish room, now, and they can't actually get her IN there to fetch so much as a guppy any more.)

Really, you should think about the collateral damage...

I mean, the place where you left his junk hanging was creative, I mean really spectacular, it made a STATEMENT, but that whole high school football team is gonna be in therapy for the next six years.  (Other than the quarterback, obviously, but the doctors say that he'll PROBABLY recover some cognitive function after a the electroshock therapy finally hits the memory and burns it out.)

He told me he believed in reincarnation, so I taught him a lesson for the next life.