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ITT: TGRR helps you with your personals ads.

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, November 08, 2011, 06:09:42 PM

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EK WAFFLR

#270
November 16, 2011, 10:25:24 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 16, 2011, 07:55:47 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on November 16, 2011, 12:25:01 AM
Ok. I want one.

QuoteNORWAY - Cuban Superman Seeks Gullible Woman For Obvious Reasons

30s/M/Not Picky - I am an Albino Cuban, currently living in Oslo.  Every woman wants a Cuban, admit it...We're like weasels on speed in bed, and we have no other purpose in life, so there's no hassles in between bouts of frenzied bed-wrecking.  That's right, it's like having a boyfriend, except without the relationship hassles.  I realize this objectifies me, and makes me into something like an appliance, but I'm comfortable with that.

My perfect woman would be a) female and b) female.  I don't care if you're a mess of bad wiring and substance abuse issues, as I honestly have no opinions outside of the sack.  It's almost like I cease existing when the lights are on.  Isn't this what you've always dreamed of?  Of course it is.  Reply today.


I THINK I LOVE YOU!
"At first I lifted weights.  But then I asked myself, 'why not people?'  Now everyone runs for the fjord when they see me."


Horribly Oscillating Assbasket of Deliciousness
[/b]

The Good Reverend Roger

#271
November 16, 2011, 10:34:08 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on November 16, 2011, 10:25:24 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 16, 2011, 07:55:47 PM
Quote from: Waffle Iron on November 16, 2011, 12:25:01 AM
Ok. I want one.

QuoteNORWAY - Cuban Superman Seeks Gullible Woman For Obvious Reasons

30s/M/Not Picky - I am an Albino Cuban, currently living in Oslo.  Every woman wants a Cuban, admit it...We're like weasels on speed in bed, and we have no other purpose in life, so there's no hassles in between bouts of frenzied bed-wrecking.  That's right, it's like having a boyfriend, except without the relationship hassles.  I realize this objectifies me, and makes me into something like an appliance, but I'm comfortable with that.

My perfect woman would be a) female and b) female.  I don't care if you're a mess of bad wiring and substance abuse issues, as I honestly have no opinions outside of the sack.  It's almost like I cease existing when the lights are on.  Isn't this what you've always dreamed of?  Of course it is.  Reply today.


I THINK I LOVE YOU!

I know *I* do.  What's not to love?
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#272
November 17, 2011, 02:37:16 AM
WHAT THE FUCK

Roger is MAGIC

I changed my OKC profile and just got flirted with by a guy who is six years younger, articulate, smart, well-read, hot as hell, loves pork, likes kids, and runs a doggie daycare.

"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#273
November 17, 2011, 10:13:59 PM
And now, a guy my age who is tall, handsome, athletic and articulate is chatting me up.

I've NEVER had my online profile hit on by guys of this caliber! I am going to sacrifice a Vindaloo to the Great Love God Roger tonight.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Juana

#274
November 17, 2011, 11:30:38 PM
:lulz: I should do the same.
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

Freeky

#275
November 17, 2011, 11:33:08 PM
Hey, can I please have an OKCupid profile thing?  This just looks like too much fun not to get in on. :lol:

Luna

#276
November 20, 2011, 02:08:37 AM
Roger, goddamn it.  I KNOW you're responsible for this.   :horrormirth:

http://vimeo.com/31041703
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

President Television

#277
November 20, 2011, 02:27:37 AM
Ad for a neurotic Canadian?
My shit list: Stephen Harper, anarchists that complain about taxes instead of institutionalized torture, those people walking, anyone who lets a single aspect of themselves define their entire personality, salesmen that don't smoke pipes, Fredericton New Brunswick, bigots, philosophy majors, my nemesis, pirates that don't do anything, criminals without class, sociopaths, narcissists, furries, juggalos, foes.

Luna

#278
November 20, 2011, 02:30:11 AM
Quote from: Uncle Wallified on November 20, 2011, 02:27:37 AM
Ad for a neurotic Canadian?

Horrible personal ad that may have permanently slammed my lady bits closed.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

President Television

#279
November 20, 2011, 03:39:24 AM
Quote from: Luna on November 20, 2011, 02:30:11 AM
Quote from: Uncle Wallified on November 20, 2011, 02:27:37 AM
Ad for a neurotic Canadian?

Horrible personal ad that may have permanently slammed my lady bits closed.

Haha, I was requesting.
My shit list: Stephen Harper, anarchists that complain about taxes instead of institutionalized torture, those people walking, anyone who lets a single aspect of themselves define their entire personality, salesmen that don't smoke pipes, Fredericton New Brunswick, bigots, philosophy majors, my nemesis, pirates that don't do anything, criminals without class, sociopaths, narcissists, furries, juggalos, foes.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#280
November 20, 2011, 03:42:03 AM
Quote from: Luna on November 20, 2011, 02:08:37 AM
Roger, goddamn it.  I KNOW you're responsible for this.   :horrormirth:

http://vimeo.com/31041703

:lulz: Brilliant!
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Cain

#281
November 20, 2011, 10:25:50 PM
Viable tactic discovered: mocking the adverts of others.  This has the advantage of selecting for people who are not complete idiots, thus wasting less time.

The Good Reverend Roger

#282
March 01, 2013, 03:25:22 AM
I am feeling particularly Holy™, with this round of brain flukes.

The Love Doctor is IN.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Juana

#283
March 01, 2013, 03:52:40 AM
:lulz: I still get hits on the one you wrote for me.
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

The Good Reverend Roger

#284
March 01, 2013, 03:56:26 AM
Quote from: Juana Go? on March 01, 2013, 03:52:40 AM
:lulz: I still get hits on the one you wrote for me.

Holiness™ doesn't wear off.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.
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