In terms of the OP: I haven't followed up immediately, because the details are incredibly hard to pin down. You try to chase a behavior or mode of thought to its origin, and it gets all slippery. The mind immediately self-justifies, and you're left with ashes and shadows.
And, to be honest, it's a bit frightening. Do I really want to find out that some of my favorite patterns were imposed upon me, rather than self-generated? In the end, I suppose it all adds up to "me", but this Doktor business can be unsettling.
Over the weekend, I'm going to track down a small piece, see if I can get my hands on it, and offer up something concrete.