Recruitment (AKA: getting TGRR to shut the fuck up by amusing him w fresh meat)

[Triple Zero]

There are a lot of things that we could do, admittedly a lot of it has been down to performance issues, myself and trip have been doing what we can and it seems to be improving.

Seems to be running pretty smoothly now, doesn't it? I saw on the server the new SMF2 changed the DB structure (just slightly), that might mean the DB got a refresher too, I dunno if MySql acquires crud over the years. /OT

Another is identifying if a forum is still the best method of communication, all the forums I have been on in the last few years have started dwindling compared to feed sites.

Well what Cram said, we shouldn't try to change it. I've seen communities die that way as well. Every change tends to alienate part of the userbase. Maybe not the regulars, but the not-quite-regulars might decide to drop by less regularly if the medium changes. Personally I'd rather see this place end up as a wasteland (not if we can help it of course) than to go down that route.

[Triple Zero]

Then there is always, whenever we post something cool: DIGG/STUMBLE/REDDIT that shit. How will our public know how great we are unless we tell them.

things that would be helpful towards this end:

buttons for "share on facebook", "post this to http://www.reddit.com/r/discordia", blog this, etc

I could code this, but there's probably plugins for SMF2 available, which would be easier and more fully-featured.

I really don't know if I'd like to see a row of reddit/twitter/facebook buttons on every thread though.

This question "How can we turn a forum thread into something an outsider would read?" keeps coming up.

You know what would be really sick?


If we had a button that turned a post into a PDF set on Official Discordian Letterhead, with nice fonts and an artistic frame.

If you can find me Official Discordian Letterhead I'll make something that does it. I went looking for the letterhead in september and couldn't find it.

Is there an SMF plugin that can make PDFs? Or did you have some other method in mind? Turning a webpage into a PDF is not as trivial as it might seem (server-side). But it's a cool idea, I can explore some options--unless you already have something in mind because previously my explorations in server-side PDF generation have come up rather shitty.

Wouldn't it also work if we'd had an option to view a single post as a cool letter with letterhead in HTML? People can just hit "print" on that, and it's about a 1000x easier to code.

For example I could modify the "view as single post" template so it looks like a full-page pamphlet, white background, black serif letters, letterhead, Discordian date in typewriter font, etc. It'd be pretty funky if people would link their friends and they'd not get this forum-view but something that looks very oldskool paper print.



Also, Faust, if you'd just dump any PDFs you have and/or find into a directory on the server, I will code a nice index page for it.

[Faust]

Wouldn't it also work if we'd had an option to view a single post as a cool letter with letterhead in HTML? People can just hit "print" on that, and it's about a 1000x easier to code.

For example I could modify the "view as single post" template so it looks like a full-page pamphlet, white background, black serif letters, letterhead, Discordian date in typewriter font, etc. It'd be pretty funky if people would link their friends and they'd not get this forum-view but something that looks very oldskool paper print.



Also, Faust, if you'd just dump any PDFs you have and/or find into a directory on the server, I will code a nice index page for it.

The single post method was exactly what I was thinking, PDF stuff exists but it makes the page look like shit, it works off image captures of a page instead of generating a proper pdf.
I'll start putting together the documents folder either today or tomorrow, so I'll show you where it is.

[navkat]

I do think that we'll get a lot of fresh meat if we figure out how to operationalize the massive amount of material we have here.

Right now our front page says

For a large resource of Discordian quotes check out the memebomb database.

 Our current projects are The Verwirrung Blog, The Choose Your Own Misadventure Wiki, The Golden Apple Seed Missions and The Discordian Radio Station.

which is a bit dated...

there should be a PDF archive -- some way to click on a link on the front page, and get all the postergasm material. Or all the rants.

And pretty shit! With a countdown clock!

[navkat]

I feel like we should be taking advantage of that Mayan bullshit in a number of ways. Two most notable:

1. Elude to the idea that we are the ones who know what's really going on...that we have...secrets.

2. Totally ignore what year it is and start treating 21DEC12 like it's Y2K n shit. Postergasmertize end of the year raves and warnings about all the clocks wiping out all the technologies. Witness to the people, dressed like that penis from "Friends." Totally retrofy everything. Refuse to acknowlege it's not 1999. Bonus points for annoying the shit out of everyone (again) with that one Prince song and for dropping obscure X-files references.

The ideal effect is one where we've managed to weave the years '98 - 2000 flawlessly with the past four years into whimsical, memetic brain hooks that have the effect on one's mind similar to that of watching all three Back To The Future movies, drinking a Clearly Canadian and wiping your ass with pages of Michio Kaku's Visions of the Future while wearing a faux "blue diamond" knockoff from that movie about the boat where Celine Dion drowns really loudly.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I'm supposed to shut up?   

Right, then.

SHUTTING UP LIKE HELL!

[navkat]

That's the way to get it done. If you're gonna shut up, make sure EVERY FUCKER ON THE BLOCK HEARS YOU DO IT.

[BadBeast]

That's the way to get it done. If you're gonna shut up, make sure EVERY FUCKER ON THE BLOCK HEARS YOU DO IT.

Look, can you shut up please, I can't hear whether Roger is shutting up or not.

And if the World was ending at the end of 2012, wouldn't the Mayans  be called "The Decemberians"?

Also, I propose we totally ignore the 2012 prophecies, and start making our own prophecies about 2013. Every Cult and his dog are in possession of 'The Truth' about 2012, what's needed is a different spin. So 2013 would be the logical place to start. And I'll stick my neck out here, and say categorically that barring death by natural causes, accident, or bizarre sexual experimentation, everyone presently on this forum will see in 2013 pretty much in the same way as their (great) great grandparents saw in 1913.

(With naive hopes for an age of World peace and prosperity)     

[The Good Reverend Roger]

That's the way to get it done. If you're gonna shut up, make sure EVERY FUCKER ON THE BLOCK HEARS YOU DO IT.

Look, can you shut up please, I can't hear whether Roger is shutting up or not.

And if the World was ending at the end of 2012, wouldn't the Mayans  be called "The Decemberians"?

Also, I propose we totally ignore the 2012 prophecies, and start making our own prophecies about 2013. Every Cult and his dog are in possession of 'The Truth' about 2012, what's needed is a different spin. So 2013 would be the logical place to start. And I'll stick my neck out here, and say categorically that barring death by natural causes, accident, or bizarre sexual experimentation, everyone presently on this forum will see in 2013 pretty much in the same way as their (great) great grandparents saw in 1913.

(With naive hopes for an age of World peace and prosperity) 

There's that line from the father's song in Mary Poppins, where he's going on about how nothing can go wrong, in Britain in 1910.  That's about the point I realized the boy is gonna die in a trench.

[navkat]

Cue: Dark Side Of The Moon and The Wall.

Your turn.

[navkat]

That's the way to get it done. If you're gonna shut up, make sure EVERY FUCKER ON THE BLOCK HEARS YOU DO IT.

Look, can you shut up please, I can't hear whether Roger is shutting up or not.

And if the World was ending at the end of 2012, wouldn't the Mayans  be called "The Decemberians"?

Also, I propose we totally ignore the 2012 prophecies, and start making our own prophecies about 2013. Every Cult and his dog are in possession of 'The Truth' about 2012, what's needed is a different spin. So 2013 would be the logical place to start. And I'll stick my neck out here, and say categorically that barring death by natural causes, accident, or bizarre sexual experimentation, everyone presently on this forum will see in 2013 pretty much in the same way as their (great) great grandparents saw in 1913.

(With naive hopes for an age of World peace and prosperity) 

Nuh uh. If you wait til 2013, you miss the party. It's like shooting your load on the camera guy, loong after the gang-band has cleaned their faces and gone home. Even a preemie mini-splooge is better.

The fact is, people want another Y2K. The country was doin grrrreat then. Clinton was banging staffers and Mulder still had most of his marbles. I didn't know if I wanted to fuck Leo DiCaprio or Shirley Manson more. Either would have been okay.

I say TAKE ADVANTAGE of the nostalgia! Manipulate the hopes and memories of the hopeful and rememberant! Hose em all down with CK1 and reel em in...only THIS time, we'll dangle the ever-present non-existant instead of something so pedestrian as a  real threat. Pish! We're already too jaded for real threats! We need something fake and ambiguous! Something interesting.

[BadBeast]

Take advantage by all means, but have the 2013 'AfterParty' ready for all the cool kids. That's real Doom Hipsterism. "Oh, we had the 2013 thing planned before anyone even believed in 2013" kinda thing. Tabula Rasa. That way we are the Illuminati! We are the clever ones. The ones who stood back, while all the others pooed their pance in fear. It's too good an opportunity to waste just for the chance of a good piss up. Y2K was a damp squib because there was no foundation for it. Same with 2012. Partay like a motherfucker, by all means, but bear in mind there will be other parties.

And I shall be on the door, smiling in a "I told you so" way. I'm still deciding whether there will be a dress code or not. Tempted to go for "casual / smart, no jeans or trainers". What do you think? 

[navkat]

I mean, if you're going to plan on splooging on the camera guy, I'd wear the fastest pair of trainers you have.

If you wanna know what I'll be wearing, pls consult the BEST IDEA EVER thread. Something like that...but you know; with a slit down the back and a bib.

[BadBeast]

I want the moon to have babies and I want one of them so we can curl up in bed together and it can sing me songs to soothe me to sleep. Me and my baby moon.

I want a Mardi Gras ballgown made of the pelts of a thousand monkeys. Dyed purple. Floor length, of course: Costume de Reguer.

Laissez bon temps rouler!

I think that is more than acceptable, it's truly inspired. And the bib front is not only daringly controversial, but practical too!
 Of course, you would have to be naked underneath, but that's not too much to expect, is it?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I want the moon to have babies and I want one of them so we can curl up in bed together and it can sing me songs to soothe me to sleep. Me and my baby moon.

I want a Mardi Gras ballgown made of the pelts of a thousand monkeys. Dyed purple. Floor length, of course: Costume de Reguer.

Laissez bon temps rouler!

I think that is more than acceptable, it's truly inspired. And the bib front is not only daringly controversial, but practical too!
 Of course, you would have to be naked underneath, but that's not too much to expect, is it?

Most people are naked underneath their clothes.

Except for Roger.