Aah, Providence...

[Suu]

It's like I told you yesterday after you told me this, Luna, about my Monday experience at the Kennedy Plaza Subway. Everything that is wrong (or perhaps, right?) with Providence was right there while I was eating lunch. I was surrounded by the dregs of humanity that make this city the East Coast Mecca of Weird.

The four Long Island girls...sharing stories about how they all lied about going to school in Boston so they wouldn't be embarrassed by telling their friends at home that they went to school here. (Granted, they went to Jay-Woo, that's enough of an insult of character.)

The fat chick, who went back to the counter not once, but twice, with a mostly-eaten sandwich to tell them she didn't like it and wanted another one for free.

The old lady who shoved me, and cut in line, using the excuse, "I'm old, and I have rights." To which I simply cut in front of her, and said, "I'm the generation you hate, but I was still here first."

Then, of course, she tried to sit next to me. That was funny.


And to think, that's only my corner of the crazy I saw, while you experienced the joys of RIPTA lines serving Olneyville. Think of the crazy Richter sees during his morning commute, or the zealots that harassed my roommate the other day when she was walking to Walgreens for a pack of smokes.

I'm still a firm believer that Lovecraft and Poe simply wrote what they saw from College Hill...Maybe it's a good thing we can't see as far from Federal Hill, well, except for the ghetto on Smith Hill, but we only go there for 2 things: IHOP and the brew store.

Did you know Providence has seven hills? Just like Rome. Only instead of Aventine, Caelian, Capitoline, Esquiline, Palatine, Quirinal, and Viminal, it's Federal (Richter and I), College (Lovecraft), Constitution (North End I believe), Weybosset (Cathedral downtown), Christian (You and the castle), Tockwotton (Fox Point) and Smith (VA and the ghettoooo).

Yeah, shocked the shit out of me when I heard, too. Coincidences to the ancients are always a bit too common in these parts. Be it Ancient gods or Ancient civ, there's something binding us, and the weird, here to Roger William's great religious experiment.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

It's like recycling only it comes out the same end it goes in!

And less calories!

Just wait til I tell you about this parasitic infection I picked up!

Tell me more about your weight loss program!