Bolognese Machiavelli

[EK WAFFLR]

Bolognese Machiavelli

1.) Arrange to have garlic and onions cast into hot oil.
2.) The carrot and celery you must divide against themselves. Ground beef, too, shall turn upon the burner; crush any coherent resistance with a spoon of wood. Sautee until no hint of blood remains to stain your hands.
3.) Perhaps, in a dark place without witnesses, the tomato shall meet with the knife.
4.) The basil and parsley you may use without consequence. For long minutes, all shall be muddled and roil on the surface of the flame.
5.) If it is most advantageous, store cold for the proper day.

[Triple Zero]

[EK WAFFLR]

3.) is my absolute favorite.

[East Coast Hustle]

This is fucking brilliant.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

 

[Freeky]

   Oh man.

[Jasper]

I am humbled.   

[Cramulus]

posted to http://www.reddit.com/r/discordia/ -- upvote!

[Triple Zero]

OT but it seems I missed a few hilarious things in that Reddit, among which:

http://torrentfreak.com/file-sharing-recognized-as-official-religion-in-sweden-120104/



Note how their logo is a black pyramid with a K in it?

[navkat]

That sounds Nasty.

[minuspace]

    I love how you remembered the celery!   

[Reginald Ret]

We need to translate more recipies into macchiavelinese. Make it a whole book!

[Freeky]

This is still awesome. 

[Richter]

 

[Richter]

Inquisitorial Breakfast:

First, let the cured porks of the commoners be seized, unsuspecting at an early hour, and brought before the Inquisitors.  Render them in the fires of inquiry until there is nothing more to be gained, and set them aside.

Next, let the noble breads or bagels suspected be brought forth.  Let them make accounting for what facts have been has clarified of their serfs.

Spare none the hot fire of inquiry, even the matronly egg, who shall fade from hard shelled and indolent, to white with fear.

Let all be assembled publicly, as in the auto de' fe.  Lord willing, after the fires of purification, all shall be consumed.