News:

Revenge is a dish best served salty, sterile, wet and warm.

Main Menu

Michelle Obama

Started by Scribbly, February 02, 2012, 01:27:04 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Scribbly

The First Lady of the United States can do 25 pushups.

This is apparently important news which we must all be made aware of.

Carry on.
I had an existential crisis and all I got was this stupid gender.

Scribbly

A facebook protest has obtained 1500 people 'against turning off the streetlights at night'.

THIS IS ALSO NEWS.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!
I had an existential crisis and all I got was this stupid gender.

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:43:43 PM
A facebook protest has obtained 1500 people 'against turning off the streetlights at night'.

THIS IS ALSO NEWS.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!

HAW HAW!

Odds are, what's going on is someone's got his hand in the till, and they don't want you looking.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Scribbly

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 02, 2012, 01:45:45 PM
Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:43:43 PM
A facebook protest has obtained 1500 people 'against turning off the streetlights at night'.

THIS IS ALSO NEWS.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!

HAW HAW!

Odds are, what's going on is someone's got his hand in the till, and they don't want you looking.

We wrapped up with a reminder that snow is this wet stuff which falls from the sky but, unlike rain, it sticks around for a long time and makes things tough.

I can't stand it, Roger. I feel like the dam is about to burst and drown us all but all anyone wants to talk about is the result of last night's Got to Dance.
I had an existential crisis and all I got was this stupid gender.

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:51:10 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 02, 2012, 01:45:45 PM
Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:43:43 PM
A facebook protest has obtained 1500 people 'against turning off the streetlights at night'.

THIS IS ALSO NEWS.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!

HAW HAW!

Odds are, what's going on is someone's got his hand in the till, and they don't want you looking.

We wrapped up with a reminder that snow is this wet stuff which falls from the sky but, unlike rain, it sticks around for a long time and makes things tough.

I can't stand it, Roger. I feel like the dam is about to burst and drown us all but all anyone wants to talk about is the result of last night's Got to Dance.

Hush.  The dance band is still playing, even if the deck is rising a tad at the stern.  Have a little consideration for music lovers, okay?

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Cramulus


Cain

Lies.  Michelle Obama hates America and thinks she can tell you what to eat.  THIS is the real news you need to know.

East Coast Hustle

Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:27:04 PM
The First Lady of the United States can do 25 pushups.

This is apparently important news which we must all be made aware of.

Carry on.

Given how many push-ups most Americans are probably capable of doing, that may very well be newsworthy. :lulz:
Rabid Colostomy Hole Jammer of the Coming Apocalypse™

The Devil is in the details; God is in the nuance.


Some yahoo yelled at me, saying 'GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH', and I thought, "I'm feeling generous today.  Why not BOTH?"

Cramulus

We need to start a facebook pention to add pushups to american classes

or  :?

AFK

Clearly this is further indication that she is an East German Anti-Colonial!
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Scribbly

Quote from: Fuck You One-Eye on February 02, 2012, 03:31:02 PM
Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:27:04 PM
The First Lady of the United States can do 25 pushups.

This is apparently important news which we must all be made aware of.

Carry on.

Given how many push-ups most Americans are probably capable of doing, that may very well be newsworthy. :lulz:

But I'm not even in the fucking US!

I could understand it if David Cameron's dead-eyed spouse got down on the floor with a talkshow host, or if his infant son tore Jeremy Kyle's throat out with his teeth or something...

But now I am being subjected to the minutiae of YOUR fucking daytime television during the news!

:cramstipated:
I had an existential crisis and all I got was this stupid gender.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 03:34:41 PM
Quote from: Fuck You One-Eye on February 02, 2012, 03:31:02 PM
Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:27:04 PM
The First Lady of the United States can do 25 pushups.

This is apparently important news which we must all be made aware of.

Carry on.

Given how many push-ups most Americans are probably capable of doing, that may very well be newsworthy. :lulz:

But I'm not even in the fucking US!

I could understand it if David Cameron's dead-eyed spouse got down on the floor with a talkshow host, or if his infant son tore Jeremy Kyle's throat out with his teeth or something...

But now I am being subjected to the minutiae of YOUR fucking daytime television during the news!

:cramstipated:

My guess?

It's the Empire's little way of reaching out to touch you. To remind you that it's not what's happening close to you that matters; it's what's happening in the Empire's capital. To make sure you care, and identify with the goals and interests of the Empire.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 03:34:41 PM
Quote from: Fuck You One-Eye on February 02, 2012, 03:31:02 PM
Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:27:04 PM
The First Lady of the United States can do 25 pushups.

This is apparently important news which we must all be made aware of.

Carry on.

Given how many push-ups most Americans are probably capable of doing, that may very well be newsworthy. :lulz:

But I'm not even in the fucking US!

I could understand it if David Cameron's dead-eyed spouse got down on the floor with a talkshow host, or if his infant son tore Jeremy Kyle's throat out with his teeth or something...

But now I am being subjected to the minutiae of YOUR fucking daytime television during the news!

:cramstipated:

"EVERYWHERE IS AMERICA."
- Saint Toyama Koichi
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

P3nT4gR4m

Quote from: Nigel on February 02, 2012, 03:40:11 PM
Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 03:34:41 PM
Quote from: Fuck You One-Eye on February 02, 2012, 03:31:02 PM
Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:27:04 PM
The First Lady of the United States can do 25 pushups.

This is apparently important news which we must all be made aware of.

Carry on.

Given how many push-ups most Americans are probably capable of doing, that may very well be newsworthy. :lulz:

But I'm not even in the fucking US!

I could understand it if David Cameron's dead-eyed spouse got down on the floor with a talkshow host, or if his infant son tore Jeremy Kyle's throat out with his teeth or something...

But now I am being subjected to the minutiae of YOUR fucking daytime television during the news!

:cramstipated:

My guess?

It's the Empire's little way of reaching out to touch you. To remind you that it's not what's happening close to you that matters; it's what's happening in the Empire's capital. To make sure you care, and identify with the goals and interests of the Empire.

Whilst IAWTC, it still seems a bit retarded, trying to get the heart attack capital of the world to identify with someone who can do pushups. "Michelle Obama swallowed a bottle of deep-fried whisky, without chewing, and then chainsmoked her way through a carton of Superkings to wash it down?" now that would be news.

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 02, 2012, 01:45:45 PM
Quote from: Demolition_Squid on February 02, 2012, 01:43:43 PM
A facebook protest has obtained 1500 people 'against turning off the streetlights at night'.

THIS IS ALSO NEWS.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!

HAW HAW!

Odds are, what's going on is someone's got his hand in the till, and they don't want you looking.

This. And a little bit of, they want to keep you dumb, I imagine.

I honestly don't know why there is an entertainment section of the news, especially where it ends up being a bunch of unentertaining celebrity gossip. Seriously, whatever the most recent coked up starlet's antic are are not important at all. But people seem to care.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS