St. Valentine was a pussy so you could get some.

[BadBeast]

St. Patrick's Day is becoming a thing. I think it's getting worse every year. Sort of like the Thanksgiving of drinking and bar fights where people wearing green start shit with people who don't. After that, we'll start celebrating celebrity birthdays like we do Presidents'. Ga-Ga Day will involve costumes. Garth Brooks Day will involve cowboy boots, cowboy hats, and Western-style shirts with thunder clouds and horses on them. Etc.

What about Daniel Day Lewis Day?

[Cain]

The thing is, St. Patricks Day is essentially a Irish holiday, celebrated mostly by non-Irish people (no, living in Boston doesn't count).  Also, it essentially involves drinking oneself into a stupor, which can be done on any weekend, only with more green drinks.  As such, it is somewhat retarded.

Whereas Gaga Day would not only be a statement of fabulousness, it would be open to all, regardless of race, background, alcohol tolerance or fashion sense.

[Triple Zero]

Is not celebrating "Hallmark Holidays" similar to how Jehovas identify by not celebrating birthdays and Christmas or Sinterklaas?

Something about black sheep being, you know, still sheep?

I celebrate Valentine's by doing something special, if I got someone special to do it for, and if I fucking feel like it, because it's as good an occasion as any. I don't necessarily do it on Valentine's, but I might.

And every year it's the same people that shout the loudest about how they DON'T and how it's a COMMERCIAL CARD INDUSTRY FABRICATION

I don't think that I ever spent money on a Valentine's card--of course that's easy for me to say when you can just buy a bigass bouquet of roses for three bucks.

Though I vastly prefer that one time I made a chocolate fondue with bits of fresh pineapple and strawberries and other fruits. Sure I could have done that any time of the year. With candlelight and a blanket on the floor. And said "oh no special occasion, I just don't celebrate Hallmark Holidays", but I might not have thought of it, or maybe it wouldn't have ended up the way it did when we ran out of fruit...

So, if I got the "card industry" to thank for that maybe I should send them a thank-you card?

[Suu]

St. Patrick's Day is becoming a thing. I think it's getting worse every year. Sort of like the Thanksgiving of drinking and bar fights where people wearing green start shit with people who don't. After that, we'll start celebrating celebrity birthdays like we do Presidents'. Ga-Ga Day will involve costumes. Garth Brooks Day will involve cowboy boots, cowboy hats, and Western-style shirts with thunder clouds and horses on them. Etc.

What about Daniel Day Lewis Day?

If people channel Bill the Butcher, it could get messy.

[BadBeast]

St. Patrick's Day is becoming a thing. I think it's getting worse every year. Sort of like the Thanksgiving of drinking and bar fights where people wearing green start shit with people who don't. After that, we'll start celebrating celebrity birthdays like we do Presidents'. Ga-Ga Day will involve costumes. Garth Brooks Day will involve cowboy boots, cowboy hats, and Western-style shirts with thunder clouds and horses on them. Etc.

What about Daniel Day Lewis Day?

If people channel Bill the Butcher, it could get messy.

Funny, I always think of DDL, as Bill the Butcher. 

[LMNO]

St Patrick's Day = Amateur Hour.  I stay indoors.

[AFK]

This Valentine's Day, Kay Jewelers would like to remind you that if he doesn't buy you diamonds, he's probably a serial killer.

Or:

This Valentine's Day, Kay Jewelers would like to remind you that if you don't buy her diamonds, no blow jobs for you this year.


(Tell me they don't market the shit out of THAT.)

There was a pretty blatant add riffing on that idea this time around.  I forget what it was for, if it was jewelry or flowers or chocolate.  But the tagline was something like, "For a Happy Valentine's Night" 

In other words, if you don't buy this shit for your lady, you ain't getting any. 

[AFK]

Is not celebrating "Hallmark Holidays" similar to how Jehovas identify by not celebrating birthdays and Christmas or Sinterklaas?

Something about black sheep being, you know, still sheep?

I celebrate Valentine's by doing something special, if I got someone special to do it for, and if I fucking feel like it, because it's as good an occasion as any. I don't necessarily do it on Valentine's, but I might.

And every year it's the same people that shout the loudest about how they DON'T and how it's a COMMERCIAL CARD INDUSTRY FABRICATION

I don't think that I ever spent money on a Valentine's card--of course that's easy for me to say when you can just buy a bigass bouquet of roses for three bucks.

Though I vastly prefer that one time I made a chocolate fondue with bits of fresh pineapple and strawberries and other fruits. Sure I could have done that any time of the year. With candlelight and a blanket on the floor. And said "oh no special occasion, I just don't celebrate Hallmark Holidays", but I might not have thought of it, or maybe it wouldn't have ended up the way it did when we ran out of fruit...

So, if I got the "card industry" to thank for that maybe I should send them a thank-you card?

Doesn't your country make out like bandits from all of the flowers we American blokes buy for our ladies? 

[LMNO]

I don't think that I ever spent money on a Valentine's card--of course that's easy for me to say when you can just buy a bigass bouquet of roses for three bucks.

Oh, you crazy Belgians, with your socialist state-subsidized flowers... In the US, during the week leading up to VD, flower prices more than triple.  A "bigass bouquet of roses" will run you about $60, if you decide to go cheap.

[Scribbly]

I don't think that I ever spent money on a Valentine's card--of course that's easy for me to say when you can just buy a bigass bouquet of roses for three bucks.

Oh, you crazy Belgians, with your socialist state-subsidized flowers... In the US, during the week leading up to VD, flower prices more than triple.  A "bigass bouquet of roses" will run you about $60, if you decide to go cheap.

My dad once bought my mum a £200 bouquet. Being in the decorating business, she knew how much this cost.

She hit him with it.

They buy each other chocolates and go out for dinner now.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Why is one stupid made-up holiday any better or worse than any other stupid made-up holiday?

Tip: all holidays are made up. Celebrate them or don't, nobody who matters gives a flying fuck.

[Elder Iptuous]

Tip: all holidays are made up. Celebrate them or don't, nobody who matters gives a flying fuck.

except on National Mile High Club Day.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Why is one stupid made-up holiday any better or worse than any other stupid made-up holiday?

Tip: all holidays are made up. Celebrate them or don't, nobody who matters gives a flying fuck.

I am annoyed by most holidays. 

Especially Veteran's Day & Memorial Day.  The first is a day made up to show respect for soldiers who were "respected" enough to be sent off to someone elses' war, and then when the war finally ended, were told that they'd have to keep fighting a bit longer, so we could have the war end at 11AM on 11/11/18.  Great.  I'm sure they're all very grateful, in their mustard gas-soaked graves out in some farm field.

The second is the one where I take off of work, not to observe it, but to keep from being bothered by people wanting to "thank me for my service".  Look, if you'd REALLY wanted to thank me, you wouldn't have had those phony fucking "wars", not to mention the ones that came after them.  My experience wasn't war, it was a fucking TRADE SHOW.  And these kids today?  They're basically mooks.  Their "war" is ARMED FUCKING ROBBERY.

Thanksgiving is where we thank Jesus for saving the pilgrims, when they were actually saved by the natives, who we then robbed, raped, and killed.  Have some turkey.

And all the other ones, ALL OF THEM, are nothing more than reasons to buy MORE CRAP.

Except Easter, which is when Jesus came out of his cave and saw his shadow, so they had 400 more years of Rome.  And then he laid a chocolate egg or some shit.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Why is one stupid made-up holiday any better or worse than any other stupid made-up holiday?

Tip: all holidays are made up. Celebrate them or don't, nobody who matters gives a flying fuck.

I am annoyed by most holidays. 

Especially Veteran's Day & Memorial Day.  The first is a day made up to show respect for soldiers who were "respected" enough to be sent off to someone elses' war, and then when the war finally ended, were told that they'd have to keep fighting a bit longer, so we could have the war end at 11AM on 11/11/18.  Great.  I'm sure they're all very grateful, in their mustard gas-soaked graves out in some farm field.

The second is the one where I take off of work, not to observe it, but to keep from being bothered by people wanting to "thank me for my service".  Look, if you'd REALLY wanted to thank me, you wouldn't have had those phony fucking "wars", not to mention the ones that came after them.  My experience wasn't war, it was a fucking TRADE SHOW.  And these kids today?  They're basically mooks.  Their "war" is ARMED FUCKING ROBBERY.

Thanksgiving is where we thank Jesus for saving the pilgrims, when they were actually saved by the natives, who we then robbed, raped, and killed.  Have some turkey.

And all the other ones, ALL OF THEM, are nothing more than reasons to buy MORE CRAP.

Except Easter, which is when Jesus came out of his cave and saw his shadow, so they had 400 more years of Rome.  And then he laid a chocolate egg or some shit.

Easter is my favorite. We get drunk on rum-soaked cake and then burn a life-size effigy of Jesus, just like the early Christians did.

[Don Coyote]

Why is one stupid made-up holiday any better or worse than any other stupid made-up holiday?

Tip: all holidays are made up. Celebrate them or don't, nobody who matters gives a flying fuck.

I am annoyed by most holidays. 

Especially Veteran's Day & Memorial Day.  The first is a day made up to show respect for soldiers who were "respected" enough to be sent off to someone elses' war, and then when the war finally ended, were told that they'd have to keep fighting a bit longer, so we could have the war end at 11AM on 11/11/18.  Great.  I'm sure they're all very grateful, in their mustard gas-soaked graves out in some farm field.

The second is the one where I take off of work, not to observe it, but to keep from being bothered by people wanting to "thank me for my service".  Look, if you'd REALLY wanted to thank me, you wouldn't have had those phony fucking "wars", not to mention the ones that came after them.  My experience wasn't war, it was a fucking TRADE SHOW.  And these kids today?  They're basically mooks.  Their "war" is ARMED FUCKING ROBBERY.

Thanksgiving is where we thank Jesus for saving the pilgrims, when they were actually saved by the natives, who we then robbed, raped, and killed.  Have some turkey.

And all the other ones, ALL OF THEM, are nothing more than reasons to buy MORE CRAP.

Except Easter, which is when Jesus came out of his cave and saw his shadow, so they had 400 more years of Rome.  And then he laid a chocolate egg or some shit.

That is how I feel about those two holidays. "Did you go out to get free food on Veteran's Day?" "No" "WHY NOT??" "Because I fuckig hate being thanked for my service by...OH FUCKING FORGET IT" And then there are lights and sirens and I wake up in my barracks room wearing two day old clothes and feeling like a gym sock.