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Let's Talk About Standards

Started by Cuddlefish, May 25, 2012, 04:16:54 PM

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Faust

Quote from: Cuddlefish on May 25, 2012, 04:16:54 PM
A few things have happened recently that make me want to get some feedback.

I was having a discussion with a friend of mine about dating, meeting people, etc. I was complaining that I feel like I will likely die alone, as the standards I set for potential mates are absurdly high. During this conversation, I also realized that I may not get laid any time soon, because a recent "upgrade" in my standards, for even a simple one night stand, are almost unable to be met by 90% of the populace (figures are approximate and entirely made up).

Secondly, I just graduated from a two year community college, with plans on continuing my education. I expected to feel good about it (probably because that's what I was lead to believe). However, despite high-honors, deans list every semester, and the respect of many of my instructors, I actually feel a little embarrassed about the whole thing. I feel that I did not match the standards I had set for myself. It's almost like anything under highest honors (which was a mere .09 GPA points away) might as well have been an out-right failure. 

Nothing is good enough.

When prompted (by myself, or others) to lower my standards, I refuse to even consider it. However, I would like to NOT die alone, and I would like to feel a sense of accomplishment from my achievements. Is this MY problem? Is the lowering of standards the answer here? If so, how does one go about doing that once expectations have already been set?

Feeling like I was going to die alone came every time it was single, It best not to concern yourself with it. Personally all I look for in a partner is self respect and confidence, it's more about making a connection with the person than anything else anyway.

I've always had trouble feeling good about my accomplishments, getting my degree, getting a good job never feels real or like anything of significance, but I have found looking back through my old journals where I would write about being worried about working at something or not passing exams or something it does actually feel kinds of nice, maybe you should try that?
Sleepless nights at the chateau