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Coyote: A word with you.

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, June 12, 2012, 07:28:02 PM

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The Good Reverend Roger

June 12, 2012, 07:28:02 PM
Evidently you have been comparing and contrasting that scene in Charles Maturin's "Melmoth the Wanderer," the mise-en-scène in which eternal Melmoth regards shipwrecked sailors being devoured by sharks with a blissful serenity with the scene in Lautremont's "Maldoror" which is fascinatingly similar, suggesting that le Comte de Lautremont was in fact familiar with and in admiration of the Maturin. You also appear to have been deconstructing the Proofs of Immanuel Kant, which is as honorable as it is deplorable.

One salutes your intellectual vigor, your various and sundry critical faculties, the fortitude of your spleen and ideal, as Baudelaire did describe. TCC was your Hobbsian Leviathan, your Keane child with magnificent eyes, whereas PD.com is your Moore-like Utopia, or perhaps your Arcadia as depicted in the tableaux of the baroque painter Nicolas Poussin, or for that matter the milieu of the primarily hued Madonna-con-Bambinos of a Raphael, a Titian, a Fra Angelico in all your Uffizis, your Vatican Cities, your Louvres of the psyche. That is good! Or as you so vernacularly ejaculate in all-caps, "cool."

From node to node, this medium is like unto the Net of Indra of yon Hindu tradition, that multiheaded cobra, that old octopus of Frank Norris, who was American, or perhaps not unlike a dissolute uncloth'd game of "Twister" circa 1967 replete with swinging singles, cheap scented candles, incense and peppermints, tambourines and elephants offered unto Gog and Magog. There was that enigmatic monolith in the grand cinema of Stanley, and soon thereafter clockwork ultraviolence, followed by Lady Lyndon's betrayal by her betrothed, but now there is this, the gnosis that surpasseth that offered by the serpent of Genesis, the photovoltaic chemistry of Benjamin Franklin, the vagina dentata of Jung, the maximum hold of the Final 'Net.

Or words to that effect.

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Don Coyote

#1
June 13, 2012, 05:38:40 AM
Oi Reverend!!!! What the hell man? Look I know that shit that is going to happen in Trafalgar is going to bug you, but that is not excuse for bring up my extra-curriculars in a public forum. I mean, damn, shit, fuck, dude, it is NOT my fault that things will happen that way. I am sorry that you will never get to get it on with that statue.

It pains me to say this, but I engineered PD.com a century ago as a breeding ground for unlicensed scorpion tap dance gambling. But NOOOOO you fucks just had to invent your fucking interwebs with your lolcats and your trolls and bacon memes. Mutha fuckas, I was going to be rich. I was going to OWN Australia and half of New Zeland with that cash. I was going to cut you in man, but that shit that will happen in Trafalgar, just means no.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#2
June 13, 2012, 08:58:24 AM
 :lulz: What the shit

You fucking Holy Men.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#3
June 13, 2012, 02:11:00 PM
Quote from: Guru Quixote on June 13, 2012, 05:38:40 AM
I am sorry that you will never get to get it on with that statue.

That statue wanted me.  It had a sexy plinth.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

#4
June 13, 2012, 02:39:37 PM
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on June 13, 2012, 08:58:24 AM
:lulz: What the shit

You fucking Holy Men.

I've been the lucky recipient of many acts of unsolicited kindness this month; including pictures of diseased lungs on billboards to force me to stop smoking, Christians reminding me that Jesus was beat to a bloody heap on my behalf to remind me that if I don't become his zombie slave I will fry in hell forever, vegetarians reminding me that if I am cruel to the noble chicken I will make the baby Buddha cry, dozens of kind strangers calling me on the telephone around dinnertime to help me with my carpet cleaning/home mortgage/charitable contribution needs and hundreds of good-hearted souls who emailed me to help me get an erection which lasts 70 hours1.

I am filled with warmth and if I am filled with any more warmth I will start shooting people.






1  That last one is puzzling.  Who the hell wants a 70 hour erection?  LMNO has had a 30 year erection, and it's caused him no end of grief at airport security.  2 hours should be enough for anyone under normal circumstances...After that, you're just bragging.

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Don Coyote

#5
June 13, 2012, 06:10:50 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 02:11:00 PM
Quote from: Guru Quixote on June 13, 2012, 05:38:40 AM
I am sorry that you will never get to get it on with that statue.

That statue wanted me.  It had a sexy plinth.

Look man, we have RULES and LAWS for a REASON. If you contraindication1 them then you might has well be a ANARCHIST or a HEDGEFUND MANAGER, or HALLIBURTON. I will NOT be held accountable the terriblosities that will befall you and those around you, and those not around you, and THE CHILDREN. SWEET AND SOUR HOT AND COLD RUNNING JESUS ON A CRACKER, the CHILDREN, just think of them. Having fun. Not learning the properways of IN THE NADS, or how to MAKE BABY JESUS CRY IN THREE EASY INSTALLMENT PLANS.

YOU, yes you, are the REASON we had nice things, but you never sent that thank you note to Great Aunt HGYGKUYRKJLOIULNF"gyyfutyfrj, and now we have to accidentally the beartraps and shoes.

THE SHOES!!!

OH GOD

IT IS FULL OF SHOES!!!!!


1. turns out to be a real word. D/N/T the HOLYTM

The Good Reverend Roger

#6
June 13, 2012, 07:12:54 PM
Quote from: Guru Quixote on June 13, 2012, 06:10:50 PM
Look man, we have RULES and LAWS for a REASON. If you contraindication1 them then you might has well be a ANARCHIST or a HEDGEFUND MANAGER, or HALLIBURTON. I will NOT be held accountable the terriblosities that will befall you and those around you, and those not around you, and THE CHILDREN. SWEET AND SOUR HOT AND COLD RUNNING JESUS ON A CRACKER, the CHILDREN, just think of them. Having fun. Not learning the properways of IN THE NADS, or how to MAKE BABY JESUS CRY IN THREE EASY INSTALLMENT PLANS.

I TRIED to tell them about I WILL KILL A MOTHERFUCKER, but they just looked at me like I was a CRAZY PERSON.  They just shook their heads sadly and then looked away.  But now they're slave laborers in their own homes and they call me on the phone and say "WHY DIDN'T YOU WARN US?" and I try to explain but I can't get them to understand my position and they just jabber nonsense at me and slam the phone down.

Tell me, Coyote, JUST WHAT THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Don Coyote

#7
June 13, 2012, 11:19:13 PM
Buy Peace Bonds, sell War Bonds, exchange Chili Bonds, steal Fap Bonds, pirate Viagra Bonds. What more and less tv. Devour an entire free range rare steak, wash it down with a diet cola beverage. Give lions the stink eye while you eat a garden burger, feeling smug that you are a primate that doesn't eat meat. Disregard the chemical tastes of the stews that are used to solidify and stabilize the fats in your diet, that you shouldn't be eating except when you are lowcarbing. Pay $100 of shitty boots that were made from recycled materials in Pakistan in a free trade workshop. Fight the system by using your iphone to tweet your videos on youtube that you took of the horrors of recycling high tech that no one loves or wants. Then recycle your iphone in a year when the newest and besterer one comes out. Remind everyone how much you need the unlimited data so you can share your lolcats and witty insight into how stupid the president's hair looks. Eat the hell out of your factory raised cow-like meat with artificially colored, preserved, pasteurized cheese food-like product. Ask for extra sugar in your tomato based sauce. Rise it all down with more diet cola beverage, that contains traces of carcinogenic dyes. Grow your own food. Fertilized with your own shit. Die of parasites.

The Good Reverend Roger

#8
June 13, 2012, 11:38:09 PM
Quote from: Guru Quixote on June 13, 2012, 11:19:13 PM
Buy Peace Bonds, sell War Bonds, exchange Chili Bonds, steal Fap Bonds, pirate Viagra Bonds. What more and less tv. Devour an entire free range rare steak, wash it down with a diet cola beverage. Give lions the stink eye while you eat a garden burger, feeling smug that you are a primate that doesn't eat meat. Disregard the chemical tastes of the stews that are used to solidify and stabilize the fats in your diet, that you shouldn't be eating except when you are lowcarbing. Pay $100 of shitty boots that were made from recycled materials in Pakistan in a free trade workshop. Fight the system by using your iphone to tweet your videos on youtube that you took of the horrors of recycling high tech that no one loves or wants. Then recycle your iphone in a year when the newest and besterer one comes out. Remind everyone how much you need the unlimited data so you can share your lolcats and witty insight into how stupid the president's hair looks. Eat the hell out of your factory raised cow-like meat with artificially colored, preserved, pasteurized cheese food-like product. Ask for extra sugar in your tomato based sauce. Rise it all down with more diet cola beverage, that contains traces of carcinogenic dyes. Grow your own food. Fertilized with your own shit. Die of parasites.

I just started dancing. 

At my desk.

Two of my electricians are staring at me in stunned horror.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

LMNO

#9
June 14, 2012, 12:57:09 AM
Hey, may I set that to music?

Don Coyote

#10
June 14, 2012, 01:04:45 AM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on June 14, 2012, 12:57:09 AM
Hey, may I set that to music?

I would be honored.

Don Coyote

#11
June 14, 2012, 01:05:50 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 11:38:09 PM
Quote from: Guru Quixote on June 13, 2012, 11:19:13 PM
Buy Peace Bonds, sell War Bonds, exchange Chili Bonds, steal Fap Bonds, pirate Viagra Bonds. What more and less tv. Devour an entire free range rare steak, wash it down with a diet cola beverage. Give lions the stink eye while you eat a garden burger, feeling smug that you are a primate that doesn't eat meat. Disregard the chemical tastes of the stews that are used to solidify and stabilize the fats in your diet, that you shouldn't be eating except when you are lowcarbing. Pay $100 of shitty boots that were made from recycled materials in Pakistan in a free trade workshop. Fight the system by using your iphone to tweet your videos on youtube that you took of the horrors of recycling high tech that no one loves or wants. Then recycle your iphone in a year when the newest and besterer one comes out. Remind everyone how much you need the unlimited data so you can share your lolcats and witty insight into how stupid the president's hair looks. Eat the hell out of your factory raised cow-like meat with artificially colored, preserved, pasteurized cheese food-like product. Ask for extra sugar in your tomato based sauce. Rise it all down with more diet cola beverage, that contains traces of carcinogenic dyes. Grow your own food. Fertilized with your own shit. Die of parasites.

I just started dancing. 

At my desk.

Two of my electricians are staring at me in stunned horror.

EXCELLENT

I hope that as decompress from college, that more of the horrormirth that I learned will tumble out.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#12
June 14, 2012, 02:21:25 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 13, 2012, 11:38:09 PM
Quote from: Guru Quixote on June 13, 2012, 11:19:13 PM
Buy Peace Bonds, sell War Bonds, exchange Chili Bonds, steal Fap Bonds, pirate Viagra Bonds. What more and less tv. Devour an entire free range rare steak, wash it down with a diet cola beverage. Give lions the stink eye while you eat a garden burger, feeling smug that you are a primate that doesn't eat meat. Disregard the chemical tastes of the stews that are used to solidify and stabilize the fats in your diet, that you shouldn't be eating except when you are lowcarbing. Pay $100 of shitty boots that were made from recycled materials in Pakistan in a free trade workshop. Fight the system by using your iphone to tweet your videos on youtube that you took of the horrors of recycling high tech that no one loves or wants. Then recycle your iphone in a year when the newest and besterer one comes out. Remind everyone how much you need the unlimited data so you can share your lolcats and witty insight into how stupid the president's hair looks. Eat the hell out of your factory raised cow-like meat with artificially colored, preserved, pasteurized cheese food-like product. Ask for extra sugar in your tomato based sauce. Rise it all down with more diet cola beverage, that contains traces of carcinogenic dyes. Grow your own food. Fertilized with your own shit. Die of parasites.

I just started dancing. 

At my desk.

Two of my electricians are staring at me in stunned horror.

:lulz: This makes me want to hug people.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

LMNO

#13
June 14, 2012, 03:41:08 AM
Quote from: Guru Quixote on June 14, 2012, 01:04:45 AM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on June 14, 2012, 12:57:09 AM
Hey, may I set that to music?

I would be honored.

http://www.reverbnation.com/artist/control_room/284942?tab=profile&subnav=profile_songs

In case you couldn't guess, it's "Rant of the Coyote".  Don't say I never did anything for you, you bastard.
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