How to BE a fat bastard

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

Peanut butter milkshakes with cheesecake. 

But seriously, I wouldn't worry about it. You'll probably outlive EVERYBODY.

[East Coast Hustle]

ECH, you're dodging the question, what do I need to eat to be a fat bastard?

I'm 6'1" and barely 138 pounds.

That reminds me, when I get home you're coming over for dinner. I'll try to make it as calorie-laden as possible.

[Triple Zero]

This thread inspired me to make a toast cheese sandwich with bacon and aged gouda and sambal badjak and bacon.

I tried to snap a picture but I ated it.

[LMNO]

I offer the following for your consideration:



This is a bacon cheesburger between two Krispy Kreme glazed donuts.

Courtesy our newest poster child for DIABEETUS, Paula Deen.

[Elder Iptuous]

wtf is the appeal of that?!
the sugar would ruin the taste of a burger.
plus, a decent burger is already messy enough without being glazed.



ooh... but if you could make a burger in kolache format, that would be awesome...

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

wtf is the appeal of that?!
the sugar would ruin the taste of a burger.
plus, a decent burger is already messy enough without being glazed.



ooh... but if you could make a burger in kolache format, that would be awesome...

Sausage kolaches. I've never seen them frosted, though. Just wrapped in mildly sweet yellow dough made with a fuckton of egg yolks and no whites. I can post the recipe if anybody wants it.

Sausage goes with all kinds of sweet. That's why people push them around in pancake syrup.

[Elder Iptuous]

they have the pastry kolaches with the fruit in them, and they are sugary.  like with the crystallized sugar on top...
not the meat ones though.

i love stopping at the czech stop in West whenever i go down to austin.

but i'm wondering if there's a way to have a cheeseburger in a kolache.  somehow have the meat, cheese and bread hot with the veggies cold inside...

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

ECH, you're dodging the question, what do I need to eat to be a fat bastard?

I'm 6'1" and barely 138 pounds.

That reminds me, when I get home you're coming over for dinner. I'll try to make it as calorie-laden as possible.

[Freeky]

I offer the following for your consideration:



This is a bacon cheesburger between two Krispy Kreme glazed donuts.

Courtesy our newest poster child for DIABEETUS, Paula Deen.

You're shitting me.

"Hey, everybody!  We don't need to worry about things we eat!  Yeah, screw making insulin, we'll just shoot up whenever!"

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

they have the pastry kolaches with the fruit in them, and they are sugary.  like with the crystallized sugar on top...
not the meat ones though.

i love stopping at the czech stop in West whenever i go down to austin.

but i'm wondering if there's a way to have a cheeseburger in a kolache.  somehow have the meat, cheese and bread hot with the veggies cold inside...

Just make hamburger buns out of kolache dough, I guess.
Takes awhile, though. The good kind has to rise twice.

[Cain]

I hate to rain on y'alls' parades, but done properly, deep-frying is a reasonably healthy way to prepare your food.

Of course, the food being deep-fried can, itself, be horribly unhealthy, and most people don't have the first clue how to deep-fry things correctly, but still.

"Done properly" is not one frequently associates with Scottish cuisine.

They'd deep fry Irn-Bru up there, if they could figure out how.

Via TDM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDimFZ0peu4

Deep Fried Irn Bru Butter Balls 

[Cain]

I disagree Cain, you are probably mostly right but deep fried Mars Bars aren't always indigestible. There's a chippy in Stirling that used to do a stunning haggis and chips and a really delicate deep fried Mars Bar.

Haggis makes everything better, though, here's a bag I bought the other day for a laugh. Turns out they are really really tasty

http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a289/goblinhill/Haggiscrisps.jpg


and what is not to love about naturally grown haggis?


edited for fat fingers . . .

Properly made haggis is a joy to eat.  In my four years in Scotland, I managed to have it once.  The rest of the time it was the dreaded haggis from a can, or worse, vegetarian haggis.

I suppose anywhere that could make haggis well probably could do a decent deep fried Mars Bar....but that place is mostly certainly not the St Andrews Fish and Chip shop.  Batter and deep fry ALL THE THINGS is all they know how to do.

[MMIX]

There's nothing sadder than a bad chippy when it comes to take-aways.

[zengmar]

what's in a vegetarian haggis?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

what's in a vegetarian haggis?

PLEASE NO ONE ANSWER THAT.