Sermon # Whatever: I fucking hate you. Die.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

AND THEN YOU PUKED UP THE HALF LIZARD.

It's legs were still kicking, and it set my stomach off.

AND THEN THE CAT ATE IT.

I will NOT be held accountable for the actions of that fucking cat.  I didn't buy it, I never agreed to let it stay.

YOU deal with the little Nazi furball.  I HATE cats.

[Freeky]

AND THEN THE CAT BARFED IT UP.


Luckily, it was all over your boots.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

AND THEN THE CAT BARFED IT UP.


Luckily, it was all over your boots.

Twice-Barfed Lizard. 

[Freeky]

AND THEN THE CAT BARFED IT UP.


Luckily, it was all over your boots.

Twice-Barfed Lizard. 

The stench was horrific.

[Freeky]

When I'm on drugs, you fuckers will KNOW it.

AND THEN YOU NEVER SHARE YOU BASTARD!

[The Good Reverend Roger]

AND THEN THE CAT BARFED IT UP.


Luckily, it was all over your boots.

Twice-Barfed Lizard. 

The stench was horrific.

That was the cat's part.  My puke has no odor at all.  Comes with being Holy^TM.  I also don't rot.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

When I'm on drugs, you fuckers will KNOW it.

AND THEN YOU NEVER SHARE YOU BASTARD!

That's because you would just use it to get high.  For me, it's a religious thing, not some crass means to excuse running around naked and acting like an animal.

[Freeky]

When I'm on drugs, you fuckers will KNOW it.

AND THEN YOU NEVER SHARE YOU BASTARD!

That's because you would just use it to get high.  For me, it's a religious thing, not some crass means to excuse running around naked and acting like an animal.

YOU ARE A LIAR, SIR. 

I SAY AGAIN, YOU ARE A LIAR.

You are acting like I am not sitting across the table from you, seeing that smirk on your face.  I'M SITTING RIGHT HERE.  I CAN HEAR YOU GIGGLING.  You use cactus simply as a crass excuse to run around naked and act like an animal. 

YES YOU DO SIR.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

When I'm on drugs, you fuckers will KNOW it.

AND THEN YOU NEVER SHARE YOU BASTARD!

That's because you would just use it to get high.  For me, it's a religious thing, not some crass means to excuse running around naked and acting like an animal.

YOU ARE A LIAR, SIR. 

I SAY AGAIN, YOU ARE A LIAR.

You are acting like I am not sitting across the table from you, seeing that smirk on your face.  I'M SITTING RIGHT HERE.  I CAN HEAR YOU GIGGLING.  You use cactus simply as a crass excuse to run around naked and act like an animal. 

YES YOU DO SIR.

Balls.  That's just my sanctity leaking out a bit.  I eat cactus to commune with All Things.  But it's like an old school "party line".  You never know who's gonna pick up the phone.  It's usually not anyone with modern sensibilities or standards of conduct.

That time, it was some Wotan-wannabe who needed to be The Mighty Hunter.  It could have been worse.  I could have picked up on one of the old English gods.  That's ALWAYS a mess, and you can never get the stains out.

[Freeky]

I think I might have preferred if you had gone over to Welshland to conquer them.  All of that shenanigans is normal over there.

And they share.

[tyrannosaurus vex]

Is slack a sub-genius thing?  Those guys are weird.

I don't recall discordianism ever requiring having a voice or using it.  Either to rant at others, or belittle them. It is interesting to get other people to think if only for a moment, but thinking isn't strictly necessary.

Oh my! I wonder if this statement will have any bearing on the following ones. Let's find out.

I'm a little troubled that you see yourself or others on this board as a 'superior mutant'.  Any mutations among us are sufficiently small as to make us virtually indistinguishable from each other.  Looking down on others is a little pointless, when the location of the high ground is still in question.  Of course, if you're sure you're on the high ground, by all means look down and tell us what you see.

Part of being the Pope is having the Divine Right to assert one's own moral superiority. However, in this case, TDRR really is morally superior. Especially to you. So is the average turnip, by the by.

You seem to see our society as some kind of trap to hold us back, when it seems to me that society is just as likely the wind beneath our wings.  Allowing billions of individuals the chance to work together to create something greater than the sum of its parts.  The best part is, we don't even have to see our part in this, we don't have to understand it.

In Syria, I hear the wind beneath their wings is so fantastic and amazing that most of the people don't even have any wings anymore. But no, Human society is a beautiful thing. No, really. I don't see why we should change one little thing about it.

It works regardless in spite of our intelligence and ability to see what is going on.

It's quite the trip.  If creating subversion is your trip, do it.  If it's catching the latest episode of Breaking Bad, do it.  If it's killing your fellow man, well, I would never counsel that others do that, but I know that some freak out there will, do it.

Sometimes I think you got hold of the brown acid, and are having a bad trip...
But it's your trip, have fun!

I guess thinking really isn't strictly necessary in your universe.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Is slack a sub-genius thing?  Those guys are weird.

I don't recall discordianism ever requiring having a voice or using it.  Either to rant at others, or belittle them. It is interesting to get other people to think if only for a moment, but thinking isn't strictly necessary.

Oh my! I wonder if this statement will have any bearing on the following ones. Let's find out.

I'm a little troubled that you see yourself or others on this board as a 'superior mutant'.  Any mutations among us are sufficiently small as to make us virtually indistinguishable from each other.  Looking down on others is a little pointless, when the location of the high ground is still in question.  Of course, if you're sure you're on the high ground, by all means look down and tell us what you see.

Part of being the Pope is having the Divine Right to assert one's own moral superiority. However, in this case, TDRR really is morally superior. Especially to you. So is the average turnip, by the by.

You seem to see our society as some kind of trap to hold us back, when it seems to me that society is just as likely the wind beneath our wings.  Allowing billions of individuals the chance to work together to create something greater than the sum of its parts.  The best part is, we don't even have to see our part in this, we don't have to understand it.

In Syria, I hear the wind beneath their wings is so fantastic and amazing that most of the people don't even have any wings anymore. But no, Human society is a beautiful thing. No, really. I don't see why we should change one little thing about it.

It works regardless in spite of our intelligence and ability to see what is going on.

It's quite the trip.  If creating subversion is your trip, do it.  If it's catching the latest episode of Breaking Bad, do it.  If it's killing your fellow man, well, I would never counsel that others do that, but I know that some freak out there will, do it.

Sometimes I think you got hold of the brown acid, and are having a bad trip...
But it's your trip, have fun!

I guess thinking really isn't strictly necessary in your universe.

Every day for me, V3x, is a new experience in gifted morons.  You can't get rid of them, no matter how many condoms you sell, so you learn to appreciate them, like a fine bottle of Mad Dog 20/20.  Each has his/her own bouquet of stupidity.  This one in particular is a sassy vintage, with a minimal forehead and no frontal lobe aftertaste.

I give him a 6.

[tyrannosaurus vex]

Every day for me, V3x, is a new experience in gifted morons.  You can't get rid of them, no matter how many condoms you sell, so you learn to appreciate them, like a fine bottle of Mad Dog 20/20.  Each has his/her own bouquet of stupidity.  This one in particular is a sassy vintage, with a minimal forehead and no frontal lobe aftertaste.

I give him a 6.

In fact, we should outlaw condoms and birth control altogether, because the only people who use them are people who are smart enough to use them. Instead, we should turn every window on every school bus into an emergency escape hatch, with a handle that looks exactly like a Snickers bar.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Every day for me, V3x, is a new experience in gifted morons.  You can't get rid of them, no matter how many condoms you sell, so you learn to appreciate them, like a fine bottle of Mad Dog 20/20.  Each has his/her own bouquet of stupidity.  This one in particular is a sassy vintage, with a minimal forehead and no frontal lobe aftertaste.

I give him a 6.

In fact, we should outlaw condoms and birth control altogether, because the only people who use them are people who are smart enough to use them. Instead, we should turn every window on every school bus into an emergency escape hatch, with a handle that looks exactly like a Snickers bar.

Or just have you, Nigel, and I write a parenting license exam.  If you fail it, you have to leave some organs at the desk.

That would prevent many social ills.  For example, people who think it's edgy or cool to have "wolf" as part of their name.

[Freeky]

Both of you are really on your game this evening.