The True Story Behind the Bacon Shortage

Started by AFK, October 02, 2012, 08:18:52 PM

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AFK

October 02, 2012, 08:18:52 PM
Porcine Rebellion.  The pigs are eating the farmers.






http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2012/10/01/14173510-70-year-old-oregon-farmer-eaten-by-his-hogs?lite
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[/size]Normally, I'd try to come up with a funny quip or pun but I feel bad for that poor SOB.  What a fucking way to go.
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

The Good Reverend Roger

#1
October 02, 2012, 08:19:48 PM
Happens more often than you'd think.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

AFK

#2
October 02, 2012, 08:21:36 PM
I can see it.  Those fuckers can get pretty big.
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Luna

#3
October 03, 2012, 01:39:11 AM
No shit...  And they're smarter than any critter that people keep for food really needs to be.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Cain

#4
October 03, 2012, 01:41:29 AM
Pig farms are a favourite way of disposing of corpses and frequently used by organised crime in more rural areas.

Just remember that, the next time you're tempted to crack a joke at the expense of your local pig farmer.

LMNO

#5
October 03, 2012, 12:45:35 PM
Pig farmers are like angels.  Angels that provide me with bacon.

P3nT4gR4m

#6
October 03, 2012, 01:12:44 PM

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Dildo Argentino

#7
October 03, 2012, 01:43:36 PM
As I was driving our minibus back from England in July with one of my sons and our dog and half our earthly possessions crammed in it, there was an unexpected traffic jam on the motorway somewhere in Belgium.

After driving along at walking speed for three quarters of an hour, the most horrendous chorus of terrified, lost, painful screams I have ever heard began to sound from the distance. It kept getting louder and louder, quite slowly, until we reached the articulated lorry full of pigs, lying across two lanes, on its side. There was a massive pool of mucky black blood under it.

Then it got quieter and quieter, thankfully much faster. I went off pig for over a week.
Not too keen on rigor, myself - reminds me of mortis
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