Author Topic: The Junkyard Hag  (Read 1397 times)


  • Hideous and Otherworldly Attack Duckling of DESPAIR
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 5644
    • View Profile
The Junkyard Hag
« on: October 20, 2012, 01:21:21 am »
"Junkyard Seance"

You can find her in the junkyard. It doesn't matter which junkyard in which city, because she's in all of them. She's the Junkyard Hag, the final aspect of the Black Madonna of Tucson, and she'll talk to the spirits for you for a price. Sometimes she just asks for money, other times she asks for something absurd or dangerous (how the hell do you get tears from La Llorona when she hasn't got eyes?. The Hag wont accept bile, y'know), and sometimes the she'll tell you to call Miss Cleo.

But once you pay - if you can pay and she accepts your offering - she brings you to her table, which sits in the shadow of the tallest junkyard stack, and tells your fortune.
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."


  • The planchette says:
  • Outlandish
  • ***
  • Posts: 249
  • Lawn sprinkler in a rainstorm
    • View Profile
Re: The Junkyard Hag
« Reply #1 on: October 20, 2012, 03:23:53 am »
More, please!  :)
Tolerable Terror for Toddlers Legionaire, Nixon Division™

"Onlookers will be horrified and amazed by the sheer volume of fluid."--TGRR

"SaraLee, I say unto you!  If ye have a cake and halve it, and then halve it yet again, you would have four quarters and yet still not have a dollar.  Eat of that cake, for it is cake which is NOT cake, which ye may have half a mind to have at a reasonable price, yet in indecision achieve satori with said stale Moon Pie.  That's what you get when YOU FUCK WITH US." - DOUR