Bill of Rights for the Real World

[Doktor Howl]

You have the right to turn your parents in for using drugs, kids.  They'll get the help they need.  You will then have the right to be sodomized mercilessly in foster care.

[Junkenstein]

You have the right to ignore scientific, empirical evidence which may threaten your self image.

[LMNO]

You have the right to ignore the inconvenient.

[Ben Shapiro]

You have a right to spend millions of dollars to stop the spending of thousands of dollars in "entitlements".

[Junkenstein]

You have the right to take a militant all or nothing position on complex, nuanced issues.

You have the right to insist that your opinion is the correct opinion

You have the right to be completely ignored. By people you want to interact with, at least.

[tyrannosaurus vex]

FUTURE DEFENDENT (HEREAFTER REFERRED TO AS 'YOU') HAS THE RIGHT TO [[REDACTED]] IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES WHERE SUBSECTION (B) OF THIS DOCUMENT (CLASSIFIED) DOES NOT APPLY. FAILURE TO EXERCISE THIS RIGHT WITHIN [[REDACTED]] HOURS OF ARREST OR DETAINMENT CONSTITUTES VOLUNTARY WAIVER OF ALL ASSOCIATED PRIVILEGES. THIS PROVISION IS NOT SUBJECT TO THE JURISDICTION OF ANY COURT, AND TRUMPS EXISTING STATE AND FEDERAL LAW (INCLUDING THE CONSTITUTION) WHERE INCOMPATIBLE WITH SAID LAW.

[Junkenstein]

FUTURE DEFENDENT CRIMINAL(HEREAFTER REFERRED TO AS 'YOU') HAS THE RIGHT TO [[REDACTED]] IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES WHERE SUBSECTION (B) OF THIS DOCUMENT (CLASSIFIED) DOES NOT APPLY. FAILURE TO EXERCISE THIS RIGHT WITHIN [[REDACTED]] HOURS OF ARREST OR DETAINMENT CONSTITUTES VOLUNTARY WAIVER OF ALL ASSOCIATED PRIVILEGES. THIS PROVISION IS NOT SUBJECT TO THE JURISDICTION OF ANY COURT, AND TRUMPS EXISTING STATE AND FEDERAL LAW (INCLUDING THE CONSTITUTION[REDACTED]) WHERE INCOMPATIBLE WITH SAID LAW.

Fixed.

[Junkenstein]

You have the right to confess what you did. We already know anyway.

[Junkenstein]

You have the right to pick a country and insist life is better there.