So about that ennui thing...

[Nephew Twiddleton]

We all get it from time to time.

And yeah, it's not the same as depression. It's kinda more like, I don't want to do anything. Except I do. I really really do. Just not that. Or that. Or that.

Well, fuck that.

I know what I want to do, and I don't want to do it. I just have to get there.

Last night rehearsing with Daniel, he pulled out a lot of old cassettes. I have never once seen a more prolific unsigned musician. He has albums up the wazz, it's just that most of them aren't actual releases.

What the hell am I doing wrong? He's ten years older than me and has like, 7 times my discography.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I've got something like the ennui. I've got it really fucking bad. I don't know if it's the season or if it's because I'm finally healing or if something is going haywire, but these last few days, I'm itchy as shit and kind of manic and I wake up early and I walk around the house looking for something to eat or fuck or kill only nothing sounds good AT ALL. And then occasionally I start crying for no reason.

What the shit is this.

[Phox]

Well, it's not simply about doing things right or wrong. If you want to make music, then play, write, record. If you can't do one, do another. You know what I mean?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I don't have the ennui.  Had it a while ago, though, and it sucks.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I don't have the ennui.  Had it a while ago, though, and it sucks.

I think ennui might not be the right word for what I have. Maybe it is, but it feels more like Spring fever at the dead wrong time of year.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I don't have the ennui.  Had it a while ago, though, and it sucks.

I think ennui might not be the right word for what I have. Maybe it is, but it feels more like Spring fever at the dead wrong time of year.

Are you holding your cigarettes backward?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I don't have the ennui.  Had it a while ago, though, and it sucks.

I think ennui might not be the right word for what I have. Maybe it is, but it feels more like Spring fever at the dead wrong time of year.

Are you holding your cigarettes backward?

Not even a little bit.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I don't have the ennui.  Had it a while ago, though, and it sucks.

I think ennui might not be the right word for what I have. Maybe it is, but it feels more like Spring fever at the dead wrong time of year.

Are you holding your cigarettes backward?

Not even a little bit.

Then it's not ennui.

EET EES ALL SO BORRRING!

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I don't have the ennui.  Had it a while ago, though, and it sucks.

I think ennui might not be the right word for what I have. Maybe it is, but it feels more like Spring fever at the dead wrong time of year.

What ever it is, it feels wrong, cigarette or not.

I want to EAT

everything tasty to the human palate seriously gimme that food

I want to DRINK

all the wicked good shit. I want the good booze. I want the balance of percentage and novelty


I want to FIGHT


I've never been in a proper fight in my life. GIve me a reason. Seriously. There's so much to fight for. Pick a fight.


I FEEL ALIVE.

FEEL ALIVE WITH ME. OR DIE.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I feel like a human trying to be human.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I don't have the ennui.  Had it a while ago, though, and it sucks.

I think ennui might not be the right word for what I have. Maybe it is, but it feels more like Spring fever at the dead wrong time of year.

Are you holding your cigarettes backward?

Not even a little bit.

Then it's not ennui.

EET EES ALL SO BORRRING!

I think I might be going into rut.

Except the only thing I've found satisfying in days is MATH.

That's abnormal.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I don't have the ennui.  Had it a while ago, though, and it sucks.

I think ennui might not be the right word for what I have. Maybe it is, but it feels more like Spring fever at the dead wrong time of year.

Are you holding your cigarettes backward?

Not even a little bit.

Then it's not ennui.

EET EES ALL SO BORRRING!

I think I might be going into rut.

Except the only thing I've found satisfying in days is MATH.

That's abnormal.

Nigel,

I come home and I want to punch my temples.

Because that's something to do.

There's a better use of my time and your time.

But really, I just want to punch myself in the head.

Fucked up, no?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I mean, I know what I should be doing.

But I CANT FUCKING DO IT.

Music right, yeah, that sound arranging thing......


I AM TOO BORED TO DO THAT THING THAT DEFINES MY EXISTENCE.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I think I used to have THINGS that I DID when I got like this, and those things were A: point myself North and drive fast and far until I got to the part where I couldn't go any farther without a boat, B: pour whiskey on it, C: GO OUTSIDE to fuck and fight my way through it, or D: all of the above.

None of those things sound like reasonable options to me now, though. So I guess I'll ride it out.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I think I used to have THINGS that I DID when I got like this, and those things were A: point myself North and drive fast and far until I got to the part where I couldn't go any farther without a boat, B: pour whiskey on it, C: GO OUTSIDE to fuck and fight my way through it, or D: all of the above.

None of those things sound like reasonable options to me now, though. So I guess I'll ride it out.

Fucking hell.

If I had a car I'd shun B. C is not an option because I should have A.

No Bostonian ever needs a car. No Bostonian should have a car.

Except between November and March.

I hate the cold. I hate it.

I fucking hate it.